This isn't the first time he has gone w/ out a job for a long period. We have 2 kids. It's not only that he doesn't work, we do argue a lot. We've been married for 12 yrs.
2007-07-12 04:24:23 · 22 answers · asked by bre 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He sat at home for 7 months while i was working, no health problems. I still had to take the kids to daycare.
The day after i asked him to leave he started looking for a job, I had been telling him for 7 months that he needed to work, he just didn't want to.
I did take him to the doctor, the doctor told him to get a job, guess what, he still doesn't have a job.
2007-07-12 04:42:09 · update #1
Do u love him? is everthing good? is this just an excuse just to divorce him?
Talk to him explain your feelings about him not working, and the strees it is causing, if he isn't prepaired to work it out get rid of him u can do better.
tc
x
2007-07-12 04:29:26 · answer #1 · answered by 8Ball 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got 12 years of marriage, that I assume he has contributed as a working partner yes? And you want to end 12 years of marriage and 2 children, over 7 MONTHS? That doesnt make sense.
I agree, he needs a job. But you didnt say why he doesnt have one? Or if he has been looking for one?
When you commit to marriage you are commiting to the good and the bad. Would he stand by you if you were unemployed for 7 months?
You owe it to him, your kids, yourself, and the marriage vows to try and work this out. Tell him your concerns. Talk to a marriage counselor. Exhaust all means necessary to try and find a happy solution before leaving/asking him to leave.
Obviously there is a bigger problem at hand, and either you dont know what it is, or you do and arent saying.
So put your big girl panties on and handle this like a woman. Talk to your husband!
2007-07-12 04:39:20 · answer #2 · answered by LeJess 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't know your complete situation at home but based on not working alone ....which often finances cause arguing, I wouldn't see it as grounds for a divorce. However, I am guessing there is a whole lot more going on at home that you didn't state here and if you have done it all, seen doctors to see if he is depressed, gone to counceling to help and so on then I would say you should move on. But for not working alone? Doesn't seem a good enough reason.
2007-07-12 04:32:55 · answer #3 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the reason that you argue a lot could be because he doesnt have a job. Why doesnt he have job? Could he get a job if he wanted to? If you are questioning your love for him then yes you should ask him to leave, but if it is just because he is not bringing in any money tell him he has a choice to either get a job or go. I am sure if he loves you and his 2 kids that he will jump up and get a job. Try to work it out before you just give up on him though.
Good Luck!
2007-07-12 04:30:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well...if hes there for the kids emotionally than that's a good thing. Is he trying to get a job? If not, I can see where you're coming from. He could even work at McDonald's. At least he would have some money coming in.
2007-07-12 04:37:40 · answer #5 · answered by Got Curves? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand that you might go through hard times since he is not working. I mean after all you are the one who supports the house and on top of that you still waste your time arguing with him. I think its best for you and your kids to leave him. Your family is not going to be stable if he does not help out. :) Good luck. You are doing the right thing.
2007-07-12 04:31:56 · answer #6 · answered by Sonrisaloca 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOu didn't say what job he does or used to do. People lose their jobs left and right these days. And men really don't like to be jobless and that adds to the frustration at home.
It is unreasonable to ask him to leave because he is at least 1/2 of the household. Basically you want to divorce him over money matters. And do you work? How would you feel if he asked you to leave if you lost your job?
2007-07-12 04:34:08 · answer #7 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No it is not unreasonable to ask him to leave. With him just sitting around that's an extra mouth to feed, extra person to provide a home for and buy clothes and other supplies for without the extra money to do it with. If he was staying home, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, etc. I'd say let him stay b/c women do that all the time, but that's not the case, sounds like it's time for him to go.
2007-07-12 05:08:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
is he looking for a job? or is he just sitting around? does he help with the kids?
you shouldnt just divorse someone because they dont have a job. there needs to be more issues to it. not everyone can easily find a job or get hired some where.
if hes abusive or something like that, then thats different.
2007-07-12 04:28:23 · answer #9 · answered by Awesome Rockin Mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends. Is your husband just lazy, or is he having a tough time finding a job? Has he been trying, or has he been sitting around not caring? If he doesnt care that your family needs him, and he rather be lazy, talk to him more, if you dont see immediate changes, you have to move on for your family. If he has been trying stick by him, be there for him, if you love him.
2007-07-12 04:33:07 · answer #10 · answered by answerme143 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Based on the info you provided I don't think it is unreasonable to divorce him over this. There may be more than meets the eye here though. I don't know your life. Is he actively looking for a job, if so then you should support him through his search. Only you know what needs to be done here. Good luck.
2007-07-12 04:27:57 · answer #11 · answered by Jewells 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋