Society falls to your feet with grace and style
...Before your lonely eyes.
Its winter breath caresses you silently,
With violent wishes...
Crimson kisses,
Fulfilling the temporary innocence and emptiness
...With calming severity;
Silhouettes in shadows trace your every step.
Casually whispering to yourself;
Somehow, somewhere,
another time, another dare;
...Another line;
...Afraid to share,
You tremble, but you know;
...Somehow you understand...
The truth beyond the temptation,
The purity beyond the question,
Knowing I’m there...
With sensuous rhythm,
The evil in others’ hearts,
Feeds the storm within.
A velvet kiss lingering on the edge of eternity,
Beckons you, blackens you,
Tearing you apart...
Silken feathers on the floor...
Broken tiles crying for more.
Give in to your pain,
Leave it behind...
Carefully shrouded memories,
Embrace your mind;
Heart felt, heart swept,
Cling to your dreams,
And I’ll take you there.
Against your better sentiments,
I’ll take you there.
2007-07-11 23:18:34 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
These...
Are the things you always wanted,
To see;
...They’re not meant for you...
...They’re not meant for me;
Hold onto your soul,
And I’ll take you there.
Forever, for you,
I’ll take you there.
2007-07-11 23:18:59 · update #1
I ran out of characters to use earlier, but, I do appreciate comments, good and bad, as long as they are honest critiques.
2007-07-11 23:42:57 · update #2
I don't know if you wanted comments about the content, or the poem itself. You have used some unique imagery which I admire, as it gives the reader "feeling"--freedom to relate to our unique experiences. You've integrated free verse with rhyme, & not "crippled" youself by forcing rhymes. I don't know what else to say....
2007-07-12 05:32:42 · answer #1 · answered by Valac Gypsy 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
The opening is a grand gesture
and then the movement, between caresses and violent wishes, that keeps going on and exasperates
And you end with
Promises, promises...that is the boldness that women fall for in poets ; )
you wish to kindle the fire in your readers?
2007-07-12 07:04:41 · answer #2 · answered by Mien 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The first time you drew me in was with a poem...I like this one the most.
2007-07-14 17:12:05 · answer #3 · answered by Candii JoJo is a groovy chick. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that really doesnt apply to me
you see ive been a puppet a poet a pirate a pauper, a pawn and i king. ive been up and down and over and out and ive been everything
but thats life.
2007-07-12 06:26:51 · answer #4 · answered by koalatcomics 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I love the words "sensuous rhythm."
2007-07-12 06:50:27 · answer #5 · answered by ♆Şрhĩņxy - Lost In Time. 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You forgot the last line:
Hallmark © 2007 All Rights Reserved
2007-07-12 06:21:24 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. Vincent Van Jessup 6 · 0⤊ 4⤋
good poem
2007-07-12 07:56:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yahoo Answers is a site for asking questions. What is your question????
2007-07-12 06:22:58 · answer #8 · answered by coffee 5 · 1⤊ 5⤋