Ok, I'm in a bit of a pickle, I think!! My fiance and I broke up almost three weeks ago and at the time, my two children and his son were all living together. My ex was throwing my children and I out of the house with nowhere to go, so in a bit of anger and desperation for my children to have a place, I took whatever money was left in mine and my ex's joint savings account and got a place. His family is saying that I stole his money, but it was in our joint account and I had contributed a little money to it. Am I to face charges or what-not for taking that money and closing out our joint account? Was I wrong for trying to provide a safe place for my children?
2007-07-11 13:25:37 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ok, I do feel bad for taking the money, I do! But the thing is, is that ONE I'm carrying his baby and can't raise three children on the streets, TWO I spent the last two months of our relationship being abused ranging from emotional to sexual and THREE I had planned on paying him back a portion of it after I was settled into a place. It's not like I was going to be vindictive and never pay him back, I'm not like that and I know I made a mistake, but I have my two children and my unborn baby to think about.
2007-07-11 13:43:04 · update #1
It wasn't out of complete anger at him...it was more for being angry that my children and I had only two days to be out of his house and that's what made me go to the bank and take our money...I even told him that I closed the accounts, both checking and savings, yet he never once asked where the money from the savings account was when I mentioned it. For all who asked, it 900 dollars and I used it all to secure a place, I planned on giving him half of that back through my paychecks.
2007-07-11 13:48:29 · update #2
Desperate measures call for desperate actions. It was a joint account, which means shared. You had to take your share in order to care for your children. He'll be fine, he only has the one child to worry about. You'll be okay too. I did the same thing years ago and I can understand your guilt. Tell his family to mind their own business, this is between the two of you. They didn't put any money into that account, so they can stay out of it. Good luck.
2007-07-11 13:34:33 · answer #1 · answered by floridagirl1261 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Since you were not married and it was a joint account, I don't think you can be charge you with anything.
However, keep in mind in most states if you are married and take money out of a joint account you will have to prove where the money went when a divorce is filed. Although, I think most Judge would take into consideration why you took the money and would probably not make you pay it back in a situation like yours.
2007-07-11 13:36:01 · answer #2 · answered by montana_mustang 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you did what you had to do. As far as commiting a crime, technically both of your names were on the account, and so you had access to the money without breaking any laws.
What I would suggest doing is getting a final statement on the account, and finding out exactly how much of the money was yours. I would also then make arrangements to repay the rest of the money back to him.
My only other question is- did you really have to take the money, or did you do it because you were mad? If you really needed the money, the I would hope your ex will be reasonable with you in repaying it. If you just took it because you knew you could then that was wrong.
2007-07-11 13:41:47 · answer #3 · answered by Meekla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way I look at it is, he left you in a bind and since it was a joint account that's what you had to do to provide for your children, unborn child and yourself. Churches aren't open 24/7 anymore so you can skip that, you have to do what you have to do.
Forget him, I wouldn't pay him back. Not when he's being such an a$$ to the mother of his future child!
There's nothing wrong with what you've done, skip what other's have said. You haven't done anything wrong, he should have thought about that before throwing you to the wolves!!!!
Besides, you emptied your own bank account before resorting to the other account that so many others overlooked.
2007-07-11 13:57:17 · answer #4 · answered by Maureen R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter what the final straw to the argument was, he was throwing you out. Was it thousands of dollars???? If so you may have a problem. If it was enough to pay rent, I'm agreeing with you.
Do you work? Do you have a plan as to how you are going to make next months rent???You'd better start putting all those numbers on paper, . Go to welfare, get a part time job, baby sit, clean apartments,do laundry mow grass and keep your money, in your account next time.
2007-07-11 13:37:24 · answer #5 · answered by sawNkansas 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2016-09-29 13:28:49 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This falls under extenuating circumstances as you needed the money for the kids and you to live so nothing will happen here no matter what they say or do. Basically this is none of his familys business here. This happens hundreds of times everyday and nothing happens so dont worry. Contact a local womans help group for assistance for you and the kids. Good luck
2007-07-11 13:40:25 · answer #7 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it is a joint account there is no reason you could not withdraw the money. I would offer to pay him back if you feel you owe him, but only once you have a secure place for you and your kids.
2007-07-11 13:29:01 · answer #8 · answered by ersof59 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is a joint account therefore you both had access to it. It's not like you forged his name on a check or stole his ATM card. It's not illegal, maybe unethical, but so wasn't him throwing you and your children out. Offer to repay him if that would make you feel better.
2007-07-11 13:34:25 · answer #9 · answered by ofsoundmind 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's is more than a "pickle." You have committed a crime. Call your ex and explain what you did and that you plan to pay him back his half as soon as possible. Tell him the exact amount you are going to pay him. Stealing is never justified. You can go to Social Services, Homeless Shelter, or a church for help. He knows that you stole from him. Show him you are not the person he is thinking you are right now.
2007-07-11 13:31:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋