I've been married for about 20 years. I consider myself a good person, a good husband and a good provider, for my family. My wife and I have always had a rocky relationship. She's one of those people who is loud and flys of the handle easily. She fusses at me and we get into arguments a lot. She trys to embarass me at times and can be a real b---ch. Sometimes she's okay but most of the times she's not. I've never cheated on her because I'm not that kind of person. In the past few months there is a single young lady at work who is always polite, kind, and compliments me. I find myself looking forward to seeing her at work. Work was a real drag until I met her. She hasn't a clue but I think about her often. I know the difference between infatuation and true feelings but this lady is wonderful. Her compliments are genuine and she says she likes it that I listen to her and enjoys talking with me. Then when I go home at the end of the day, the bubble bursts. Is it wrong to I feel this way?
2007-07-11 13:25:01 · 9 answers · asked by Nash M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow. This is hard. Home is suppose to be a haven; a place of support and not a battle ground. Of course you love going to work now; who wouldn't. What you're getting at work is what you should be getting at home; support, complements, love and affection. No, it's not wrong to be attracted to someone else who is providing you with what you need. But, it will be wrong if you take it to the next level and have an affair. You need to reconsider your marital relationship to determine whether or not you will be happy for the rest of your life. Talk to your wife and lay your cards on the table in regards to your feelings. Make it clear that if things don't change, you may have to make a move to change your situation. Good luck. But, don't have an affair. Take the right steps; get out of your current situation if you have to first.
2007-07-11 15:13:44 · answer #1 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you are feeling for this lady is perfectly understandable...You are human, and you don't have a happy married life. If this woman compliments you and makes you feel good about yourself, then of course you feel attracted to her!
What you should be aware of is that this is EXACTLY how affairs get started...A little "innocent", harmless flirting, spending time together, talking about serious issues and WHAM!- the chemistry explodes!
You should really evaluate the pros and cons here....If you are very unhappy and think you should call it quits with your wife, be a man and do things upfront...Ask for a divorce before you start getting more involved with this other woman. If you feel you have too much to lose, then put some distance with this other lady and stay away from temptation....
Those who play with fire get burned...sooner or later!
Good luck...
2007-07-11 14:04:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you and how old is this single young lady? It sounds to me that you're tired of your old nagging wife and would like to be a sugar daddy to this young woman you work with. This is bad news. First, it's not a good idea for a married man to have an affair or even thoughts of an affair...especially with someone he works with! Secondly, if you're so tired of your wife then seek counseling or end the marriage. You will then be free to chase all of the single young ladies you'd like.
2007-07-11 13:59:34 · answer #3 · answered by CrazyLove 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There is nothing wrong with finding people attractive or enticing - even if you are married.
What is wrong is acting on it.
If you want to be friends - go for it. I do believe that good friendships are "gender-neutral" If you want to be more than friends, get your wife's permission or break up with her first; doing otherwise is unfair to both women.
2007-07-11 13:34:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not at all you are married, not dead. And the new and freshness of this lady makes you feel alive, vibrant, and appreciated. All things that tend to lack in frequency in a long marriage.
2007-07-11 13:30:33 · answer #5 · answered by cynical 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
techabically,yes. sounds like you're not happy in your marriage?so why not divorce?life's short,why not live it in piece?you can't control your heart... it's gonna like/love whom it pleases.tell your wife you're not happy and go get your divorce.maybe this lady at work really likes you.does she make you happy; do you feel alive when you're with her? then be with her.
2007-07-11 13:37:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You cannot help how you feel or what thoughts your brain throws your. You may only control what you DO.
As such, you are DOING nothing wrong.
2007-07-11 13:32:09 · answer #7 · answered by Mike 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever heard the saying "Dont sh*t where you eat".......Don't get involved with a coworker, it always ends bad!! You need to focus your attention on tryin to DE-B*TCH your wife instead of boning your coworker.
2007-07-11 14:04:34 · answer #8 · answered by YUMMY1 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no its not wrong,been there,done that.when ur not happy,ur not happy.
2007-07-11 13:49:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋