If when you were out of town your husband /wife went out to a bar with a bunch of co-workers and says he got so drunk that one of his female co-workers dropped him off at his Aunts house to spend the night and he would get his car later,but said this coworker wasn't drunk. Come to find out the next day I read on her my space how she said she was so drunk and messed up! Then He had text messages at 3 in the morning and said he was texting her to let her know he got in his Aunts house ok. She just dropped him off! Why would he have to text her?Does any of this make since? Then I find out not only did she drive him to his Aunts house she drove him to a dance club first,where he says they played Bean Bags there and drank some more. His Aunts were actually at the first place for a while and left and said they were uncomfortable being there with him and said some girl was up his A** all night. He didn't tell me he went to a dance club. His Aunt told me on the phone. Would you be MAD????
2007-07-11 07:12:49 · 54 answers · asked by confused one 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I asked this before but found out new details. Sorry if you answered it before.
2007-07-11 07:14:04 · update #1
He really did go to his Aunts at 3 in the morning. She took him to get his car! But he still says he did nothing wrong
2007-07-11 07:21:20 · update #2
He also says that they met other coworkers at this dance club after the first bar so he said it's not like they were alone
2007-07-11 07:24:27 · update #3
He also says he lied because he knew I would get mad! You think!!
2007-07-11 07:35:42 · update #4
That one little lie would be all I need. If my other-half felt a need to lie to me he is doing something he knows I won't like. Once trust is f**ked with, it's usually gone for good. It's your call obviously, and I don't know what you know about you two. But if it were me, I bet the relationship would be all over except for the stuff division. That's just me. Lost trust before and never had it come back, without trust, is there still a relationship?
Peace
2007-07-17 13:52:28 · answer #1 · answered by Linda B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone first response is to get mad. But in reality, you shouldn't. The first thing you need to think about is " Do or did you trust him?" Only you can answer that. The best way to solve a difference is to be pleasant and mature about the matter. When someone is mad and yelling and cursing, do you really think the other wants to tell the truth. If he is not mature enough, then you need to be. I have been through this before. It will go a lot better if you keep calm.. You know the truth will come out in the end. I realize your feelings have been hurt, but that will get better. Everyone also knows that women like to lie about things.. MySpace is a gossip central. You really shouldn't believe everything you read. In this case I wouldn't, I would dig, secretly, and find out the entire truth. But don't go after him until you do find out the truth, and have the truth in your hands. It is better to go in with evidence, instead of assuming. Remember what assuming means.
2007-07-17 03:50:34 · answer #2 · answered by Misty D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell yes I would be mad. Sounds to me that these two had some action going on between the two of them. First of all this lady co-worker has NO business being around your husband alone, especially drunk. Second, when she dropped him off at his Aunts you were right when you said that there would of been no reason for him to text message her because she dropped him off there. Third, confirmation that she was "up his ***" came from someone else back to you.
This is diffently the big RED FLAG!
2007-07-11 07:41:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well lets look at the situation. Men will do what we alow them to do. They are horrible liars. SO confront him on his lies and tell him his lies will ruin the marriage and all he has to do is be upfront and honest. Just be man enough to tell the truth if he wants to be man to do the things he do. Then ask him how much he values the marriage? If you think its in jeopardy seek counselling. But spend some time together just the two of you learn to forgive each other. And most importantly you need God in everything. Without God there is nothing. Cause the way for man to love his wife is in the bible which is like christ loves the church. Faithful, unconditional , forgiving and patient. Also you may want some girls time to do you and love yourself. Cause if we don't love ourselves we can't love others. Discover you and have some you time. A marriage is hard work there will be up times and down but you have to guide your ship. Be blessed
2007-07-11 07:24:39 · answer #4 · answered by Sweet&Sexy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be very MAD. Mainly because there are so many inconsistencies with the story. I would be very upset if my husband was not only going clubbing with a female co-worker but sending her text messages in the middle of the night. Other than demanding the absolute truth of the matter from him, I don't know what else you can do.
2007-07-11 07:18:46 · answer #5 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Something smells fishy!! definally suspusious,and a well thought of lie with abli..Ok i understand designerated driver,he" drunk. this look like a set-up,your out of town, lets make it a social gathering so were not point out tother.get your buzz on,so we could get our groove on. or maybe everything did goes as he explained,perhaps the intentions were there! and he change his mind..but the (Girl) co-work made a pass,came on to him. and he refused.I would have to have some hard evidences or odd behavior from him first.but the text is the answer,whatever it said i would question! because he got drop off at the door no need to text,call,e-mail etc then madness comes in.
2007-07-18 12:43:40 · answer #6 · answered by atsinrocpalms 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you have more than just him stepping out to worry about... You are with a man that has to go to his Aunts house at 3 in the a.m. to be alone with a skank. Does he not believe in hotel rooms. He is also to dumb and broke to hire a limo or taxi to drive his drunk *** around. Now you are worrying if he stepped or not...You need not step you need to RUN....get a life a real job and make your own money. Find a man that has character and decency. Let him have your broke *** man. I would never be with someone who could not afford a taxi or hotel on a whim at any point in his life...or buy or pay for anything he wanted when he wanted. No woman needs a broke broke man...
2007-07-16 16:02:46 · answer #7 · answered by flateach33 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's got something going on.Who is this girl?I would pay her a visit.She drove him to the dance club? That's a date.He was with her drinking.Then he left with her.That's still a date.I would be beyond mad.After I got through with her,I would throw him out. Married men don't conduct themselves like this. If he has money to go out and have a drinking date with another women,Then he can rent him a apartment,then they will have a place to go when they are drunk,and they want involve embarrassing the whole family. Maybe you can forgive and forget. I don't think I could ever trust him.
2007-07-18 22:52:13 · answer #8 · answered by lotteda717 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Amazing how when someone lies to you and you go looking for the truth its always very different from what the lier said. When they see how angry you are they try to tell the story in such an innocent way. He may not have meant for anything inapproiate to happen but the fact that he lied make you even more suspicious. Mine did something very similar he made it sound like the whole job was going out this one night, When I finally got to the truth it was a client who works out at the gym where he worked who invited him out with her and her girlfriends to a club. I was so damn angry I made it clear that married men dont except single women's invitations to go clubbing. We had many fights after this happened because he lied to me for about a week. I dont know your whole situation so I wouldnt be able to tell you to kick his A-- out the bedroom for a few nights.
2007-07-18 18:23:11 · answer #9 · answered by blackpearl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would be so mad about that. it seems to me he wants two different lives. i dont believe he should be going anywhere without you anyway. when you are a couple you should go out as a couple. and it seems to me he has some tendency to cheat or he has cheated before and he seems not to care he even was acting out in public and his own aunt did not approve of it and left the club. none of it makes sense to me about getting so drunk and going to his aunts and you saying the girl was not drunk then she was drunk. maybe you should investigate and ask what her plans that night out with your hubby. and tell her what his aunt said about her being all over him. was she drunk or was she not. why were they going out anyway. i understand if they were all out together with more friends and you were invited. i mean i know you should trust but, when it is a girl and one guy and you know you cannot always trust a man or a woman at times. then, why did he not call you to have you come pick him up if he was so drunk or why did he not leave with his aunt. there is alot of unanswered questions here. you want to trust him. but, you got to cover yourself and stick your guard up. especially after you were told the women was all over your man. dont accuse just find out the circumstances. if he was not all over her but she was him maybe he is telling the truth. but, i think him going out by himself is making him look bad and not satisfied at home. you need to find out before something seriously happens that you did not want to. i will say some prayers for you. honesty is the best policy. dee
2007-07-17 05:30:52 · answer #10 · answered by dee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋