I've been dating this guy since March. I thought he's a nice guy and is really into me. He drive 2 hrs to pick me up to dates and then 2 hrs back home. He pays for the tickets, the meals. And took lots of pics on me during dates. Plans the next dates and call me frequently...But he doesn't kiss me or tried to hold my hands. Recently he told me he's going to another State to visit his family and maybe goin g to stay there for a while (he has a 6 week vacation from work, he's a teacher). He may even stay there for more than 6 weeks just "depends". I've been asking him when he's leaving and how long he's planning to stay there he keeps saying "i don't know. i'll probably come back though." My bday is coming soon and i asked if he's going to be here but he said he would prob leave before my bday. he said he didn't think about it. He did ask me if I would like to go with him and stayed there for couple weeks but I didn't make up my mind yet. I am confused, i feel like he's playing me.
2007-07-10 20:38:31 · 25 answers · asked by My Dear 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
need answers from people who are married
2007-07-10 20:38:52 · update #1
hes got something on the side..get rid of him..
2007-07-18 15:38:15 · answer #1 · answered by Felix 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I been married 3 x's I hope that's enough. Not currently married, but I remember what I knew then. (smile) Something's wrong. I can't tell you what for sure. My first suspicion is that he's on the "down low". That's where a man has a normal date life, even gets married, but has sex with men. To them that doesn't count because they are in serious relationship with a woman. I'm guessing the pics are to prove to his family that he's not gay, or prove it to friends, etc. I dated a guy like that once. If I were in your shoes, I'd throw this one back.
The more I think about it the more sure I am that this is what's happening to you. Sorry, just call 'em the way I see them. btw I'm almost 50, I've seen a lot.
Blessed Be
2007-07-17 20:47:40 · answer #2 · answered by Linda B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about playing you. There's allot of people that are not touchy, feelly type of people. He have asked you to go with him and you are the one that is stalling. While you are waiting for him to kiss you and hold your hand, he could be waiting for you to do the same thing. He could be putting you off, because he's gonna surprise you with something big for your birthday. It's not always as it seems. I can't see a person driving for 2 hours to see you, taking pictures and spending time with someone, just to play them. Before you start confronting him on what you think and what others say, watch carefully and then gather the facts on your own. We are so use to being hurt and abused, until we sometimes jump the gun and end up losing the right one.
2007-07-17 06:55:13 · answer #3 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is comfy taking such long vacations, most people cant take off that long because they work regular schedules. Good that he is a gentleman and pays to take you out. He has a non-committal type personality, even with the length of his vacations. He does want you to spend time with him and his family on his turf, just to see if you fit in. He is not romantic possibly because he is guilty about leading you on any further than this friendship. Either he has another girlfriend, married, or got out of a long relationship and is simply not ready. "Playing you" implies like he is using you. It sounds like he is just going very slowly...and its him that is tied up emotionally that will keep him from saying what he is feeling clearly and in a normal conversation. You can continue to spend time with him, but I think that he has a problem with being open about something. If you dont begin better communication, let him go, He wont change his spots, it will be like prying a horse's jaw open to get him to be honest in the future.
2007-07-18 21:41:44 · answer #4 · answered by nightlightview 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that he is showing you respect. He must like you a lot to drive two hours one way and two hours back. There are not many guys out there that are willing to pay the bill all the time. If he is a teacher he has to have some intelligence. He also, invited you to go for two weeks when he goes to see his family. No longer then you have know him that to me seems that you mean something to him. I don't understand where you think he is playing you. I there anything you are not telling us. Believe me, this type of guy comes few and far between. Believe you're lucky to have someone like this to come into your life but I think it is too early to go on a trip with him.
2007-07-18 21:41:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
On one hand he sounds great,But on the other hand,not so great. Why do you think he is playing you? for what? Maybe he is gay,in the closet.Because of job he wants to hide this, So he needs a girlfriend,with pictures to prove it.Something is wrong.He has not even tired to kiss you?Or even hold your hand? This is not normal.The invitation to go with him,did he say where you would stay? Has he ever had another relationship. been married? A virgin wouldn't even act like this.A true mystery man. Just don't get hung up on him because something is wrong.
2007-07-18 22:26:19 · answer #6 · answered by lotteda717 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was married...its still fresh this dating-game but why didnt he try to kiss you or hold hands ,I mean anything romantic,maybe he is afraid he otherwise will scare you,are you MUCH younger than him? But hey you could hold his hand when the moment arrives or give him a kiss,not force yourself on him but just little hints you actually like him and you feel save with him,you do right?Do you know what family he is talking about,no ex-wife and kids??WHY didnt he consider our Bday,he must have felt you are looking forward to spend it with him or ?but he did ask you to accompany him so he might not hide anything,why didnt you make up your mind yet only cause he didnt kiss you yet,maybe your first kiss or more will be overthere...just to release your worries and suspicions go with him,atleast hopefully you can meet his fooks or .....kids,joke
2007-07-18 07:14:27 · answer #7 · answered by ajal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion he's not playing you because he's not holding your hand or kissing you. I think that he is just not an affectionate person. He's may not be a kissy-kissy type of person. My boyfriend is not a kissy-kissy person and is not a hand holder but, behind, closed doors is a different story. If he was playing you why would he ask u to go with him? Girl, if you have time to go - why not. After all he's giving you the opportunity to MEET THE FAM. Girlfriend go, and have a wonderful birthday.
2007-07-18 17:14:07 · answer #8 · answered by spreetray 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With him being so "I dont know" about his plans, he could be just putting you off. Before he leaves ask him to sit down with you and ask him what is going on with your relationship. Cause it really sounds like he is attempting to keep you on a string. Don't try to second guess him, just come out and say, "This is driving me nuts, everything is up in the air and if you arent coming back I have the right to know."
2007-07-11 03:45:41 · answer #9 · answered by firefly06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you want to know if he's playing you then you should tell him that you would love to go with him if you can get the time off of whatever you do. See how he react's. If he's happy about it then that mean's that he care's about you and that he's happy he'll be able to spend some more time with you. If he start's acting weird, like he didn't think you would say yes to coming or something like that then that mean's that you either surprised him with your answer or he is playin you.
2007-07-17 11:13:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was messing around with a guy and he just said he didn't kiss. It wasn't me or anything like that. Back in the 17 and 1800's Indians didn't believe in kissing some people just are afraid of germs. Could that be it?
2007-07-15 14:53:53 · answer #11 · answered by roloswife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋