Chris Benoit killed his wife and son, then himself. His wife had previously filed for divorce, but later withdrew. Friends are saying she wanted her son to be with both parents. Do you think people stay for the kids too often and end up hurting rather than helping them?
2007-07-10 17:09:51 · 13 answers · asked by mimi s 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes. A couple should stay together for one reason and one reason only, which is because they love one another. Staying together for the kids sake is the biggest mistake a married couple could make. Although they may mean well, by staying together they are allowing their children to witness years upon years of unhappiness in their relationship. When there children grow up they will remember all of the arguments and unhappy times there parents experienced and will bring and exhibit that behaviour into their relationships. Marriage is hard work. If a couple aren't willing to put in the work, patience and love required to make their marriage work then it is just best for them to move on. Peace and God bless.
2007-07-10 17:27:38 · answer #1 · answered by cave man 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Too often, no. Divorce changes the kids forever. It scars them for life. Now that's not to say it should never happen, sometimes it has to be. But if you are unhappy, you need to find out why. Changing one spouse for another doesn't always fix the problem. Whatever is making you unhappy is probably still there. Is the spark gone? Read up on ways to bring it back. Are they cheating? Confront them and see where you stand. Do they work too much and leave you at home to tend to the kids? Find out why. Are you spending so much that it's hard to keep up with the bills? Communicate! You can get the love back. Nobody ever said marriage was easy, it's just worth it.
2007-07-11 00:18:00 · answer #2 · answered by Becky F 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. I really dont think staying together for the sake of the kids is a good idea....I think it is better for them to see two separate parents who are happy and well balanced.
Seeing their parents fight all the time or one parent abused and controlled is not a healthy environment for a child to grow up in. This just breeds another generation of people who dont know how to treat other human beings.
Staying for the sake of the kids is not a good idea. It happens too often and ends up in tragedy.
2007-07-11 00:19:25 · answer #3 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. I feel that in a situation when there are major problems that bring forth conflict... it is best to go on and leave the situation instead of staying... especially when there are children involved. Children suffer the most because most of the times, they are not at the age where they can voice how the situation affects them. Most people feel that it is the better choice to stay for the children when it in fact hinders their happiness. In my opinion it is always best to remove the children out of harms way.
2007-07-11 00:20:11 · answer #4 · answered by Candy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, i believe that is true. some parents feel it is good for the kid's to have both parents around and do not think about how the bickering and fighting may effect them. at the same time i am sure that no mother ever imagines that the father would do the kid's any harm.
2007-07-11 00:17:31 · answer #5 · answered by Star 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes.
If the parents are happy, the kids are happy.
So if you can live together and be civil and all the rest of it then by all means stay, if you are constantly yellin at eachother, i think its better to seperate.
Its a tough one, noone knows the right answer cos everyones different!
2007-07-11 00:16:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is an extreme example, but I believe children are damaged
emotionally and socially by being part of a dysfunctional family that stayed together for the "good" of the children. Been there - done that.
2007-07-11 00:16:20 · answer #7 · answered by Walter H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
opinions vary on this one. i don't think there is a correct answer. what works for some families might not work for others. i have seen families where the parents get divorce, but mom moves in down stairs, and everyone is happy. i have also seen families where the children are forever scarred because of their parents fighting in front of them.
2007-07-11 00:13:35 · answer #8 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could help ya. I am contimplating the same myself. The only thing that has been keeping me in my marriage is my kids and the fear of the unknown. I've been with him for 14 years. Kinda hard, ya know?
2007-07-11 00:24:53 · answer #9 · answered by bluebirdie1072 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I do. I left my husband of 11 years earlier this year, because it was making me unhealthy and the unhappiness was something I did not want my daughter to witness. He was very controlling, jealous and possessive, very verbally abusive, and the love was gone. I did not want my daughter to see that's how things should be.
2007-07-11 00:14:10 · answer #10 · answered by trancegoddess2001 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋