Why is most of the questions in Marriage/Divorce about unhappy couples and divorce?!?

Question

Is EVERYONE THAT unhappy with their marriage?! It's really sad... I'm sure alot of these ppl that are complaining about their spouses really truly love them when it comes right down to it, so what's the deal? Why spend so much of your life complaining about the love of your life instead of telling ppl how happy he/she makes you?! Just curious to see what everyone else thinks about this. Is everyone as disturbed as I am? I'm not saying I'm not guilty of this myself because I am... and I DO really love that wonderful man that I married! I love the way he knows what I like in bed without me having to tell him. I love the way he laughs, I love the silly things he says... I love how determined he is to take care of his family, even when it's hard to get out of bed at 2am to go to work! I love that man! Tell me what you love about your spouse... =)

Answer 1

What kind of questions would a happily married person ask in the marriage/divorce section, do you think?

Right now, I love how he's decided to clean the basement for us all, with a dream of a happy family room down there. I love the way he walked/swam with our son from one end of the deep part of the pool to the other, as my son made his first journey all the way across by himself, tonight. I love that he's just as involved in the pet problems as I am. I love that he thought my online friend's fiance's custody issues were sad. That's just the 'i love him because' things from this evening :D

Answer 2

Yes, I love my man, you will notice that I do not have any relationship questions posted here. I do not have the need to talk about the bad things that happen. Marriage is hard, and to be honest it does down right suck at times when you think there is no way to get along today because you both had a hard day, and you're tired, and you do not want to deal with another thing. That is why you married though, to go through the good, the bad, and the ugly, and have that wonderful person beside you. The divorce rate is over 50% in this country, I do not think that a lot of people take marriage seriously anymore, it has become disposable like most other things. Most people are unhappy for good reasons, have you noticed that there are not that many people on here not going through an affair of some kind. It is very sad. For a lot of people, I believe that they have lost the moral value of marriage, and fulfilling sexual fantasies with other people, or taking out their agression on their spouse, or their addiction is more important.

Answer 3

I think most of us unfortunately have time for the things that make us feel angry or frustrated. Many people seem to have these issues with cheating on here probably because when people feel taken for granted someone new makes them feel special. It is a cycle.
I follow the rule of 3 in my marriage and I think it works fairly well. 3 times a week I make sure I cook and we eat as a family, 3 times a week a compliment or a thank you, 3 times a week some touching and no more than 3 minutes of whining about him to my best bud.
The more you look at a problem, the bigger it gets!
I like that my spouse is always cooking things using all these spices he tries to sneak in things. He always gives me the first drink in the soda and when I am in the shower, remembers not to flush. He knows not to eat my fig newtons and he remembers I love anything lilac.

Answer 4

I think that the big problem that couple have is that they don't know how to talk to each other. I hear it all the time. They get married, the wife stays home and the man goes to work. well of course the wife does everything and the man comes home and relax after a hard day like she had nothing to do all day. The problem is, after a while they wife gets kids and gets tired of the man doing nothing. But she doesn't tell him she just think he's gonna read her mind.
Same thing about sex, about work , about work in the house, etc.
The women think that the men are gonna read their minds but they don't.
People need to learn to know each other and need to learn how to treat each other BEFORE they get married not after.
Women think that they will change their man after they get married. NO you won't. He will stay the way he is, if not get worse.
So SPEAK NOW OR YOU WILL REGRET IT, that's what should be said at the wedding.
My husband is great, yes he has his fault, but when we got married we talked about everything from kids, to cleaning the house, to laundry, to finances etc.
We have a five year old son and I have a home daycare, he gets up in the morning, puts the dishes away and cleans the floors while I get ready and take care of our son. He takes care of the outside I take care of the inside. If I cook , he cleans, if he cooks , I clean. Marriage is a 50/50 association and couples need to know where they're going before they even think of getting there.
Amen... :-)

Answer 5

When people are content in their life, they don't need to question it. When things start to go sour or see a little off, that is when people start to question their relationships. I won't lie, I am just as guilty as other people. But I love my husband, and I am sure lots of other people on her do to.

I think that a lot of people post, just to see if there are other married people who feel the same way. Is it normal to have unhappy moments in marriage? Is it normal to question your relationship at some point? And I think for the most part it is normal. But knowing other people in the world share some of the same problems, is refreshing.

Answer 6

I come here when I have a question about a problem I'm having at the moment. Even if I'm venting about my husband, it doesn't mean that I am unhappy with the marriage.

What I love about my man...
He is such a hard worker...he would work 3 jobs if he had to.
He is a great provider, we never go without.
He loves his kids.
He knows me so well - even though I won't admit to half of my personality traits!
He still turns me on, after (almost) 13 years together.
His smile, especially when it's a genuine smile (brought on by me!!)

Answer 7

How about where you live in relation to how your health is. If you live in a low income city, and you have a minimum wage job, and you don't have enough to get private insurance, but you make too much to qualify for MediCal/MediCare... then you have no insurance and you don't go to the doctor for checkups. Basically anything and everything in sociology is related to something. If you are a low income family, and your parents work all the time they cant help you with your homework so your grades fall, and you dont have enough to pay for tutoring, and you have to work too after school. Its all related.

Answer 8

I'm deliriously happy with my husband. He's the man of my dreams.

I think a lot of people who are unhappy either need to vent, feel justified or are honestly asking for help. I think a lot of happy people are probably here answering the calls for help. That's what I'm doing hanging out here anyway.

In order to have a happy marriage you have to work at it & that's something most people don't go into marriage knowing & they don't figure it out until it's too late...or never figure it out throughout their five marriages & divorces. sigh.

I'm a big advocate of working on your marriage & appreciating your spouse.
SG

Answer 9

I don't look at these Q&A as complaints. I think it's their way of expressing concerns in their relationship or marriages that they haven't discussed with their spouses. Or they are trying to get advice on how to discuss it with them. Marriage is very important to me. i am not married, but i still have high hopes that it will last as long like my grandparents and parents. As far as loving things about my significant other.......I love the fact that he loves me.

Answer 10

LOL... well, it's not really that interesting for most people to read " Hey, I love my man, everything's perfect in my beautiful world.. I couldn't be happier. Oh, and I just won the lottery too." People are on here usually looking for empathy, support, encouragement and advice for their problems.. though often, you do run across someone wanting to surprise the spouse they love or looking for romantic ideas. :) We all wish we were as happy as you!