self harm?

Question

i think a girl in my year 9 class in hurting herself. She don't really talk alot or fit in the class she looks like she has been crying alot. Is very tearfull in class and seems very depressed. The other children in the class do pick on her and she don't have friends. Yesurday she was geting something out of her bag under the table and her sleeve moved up and i could see deep scars and cuts. I've never come across this sort of thing before. And i am unsure of my footing here. Should i try and talk to her? I'm just really unsure of how to deal with this. I mean what if its not self harm them i've upset her for no reason.

Answer 1

You must talk to her - she without doubt needs someone to talk to.... When you do speak to her just say you are worried about her - crying etc.... Take it slowly and build a rapport with her. If she does start telling you things listen carefully and try not to judge her, however if she does tell you anything that could be deemed a CP issue you must tell her that you will have to tell someone. Ask her to consider counselling or get her a diary for her to write down her feelings and moods. She will thank you for your concern because if she is self-harming she is emotionally in need. Good luck with it.....

Answer 2

Its not clear from this if you are a classmate or her teacher. I feel if you are her teacher you should not even be posing this question you should know that you have to act to help her, recent Children's Law changes etc.

If you are a classmate then I applaude you for having the courage to speak up and to try and help her. I used to work with a girl who had previously self harmed. She was a shy person but once you got to know her she came out of her shell. She would not confide in everyone but I made the effort just to behave normally with her not making an issue about her appearance etc. Eventually one day she did tell me her story and believe me it hit my emotions hard, she had by the time I met her had counselling and help.

So if you do decide to befriend this girl and you need to be willing to be in their for the long term or as long as she needs you. Just act normally around her normal day to day stuff perhaps you could help each other with home work.

She may have a personal issue which is causing her to self harm or something with in her family. That is not for you to take on board be a friend that is all. Now that being said you must speak to your class teacher about your feelings and what may be going on. The school has a responsibility of care while you are all in class. Someone an adult needs to help her.

Whatever the outcome you will have done your bit to help and however it ends up you might not know it but she will be grateful for your friendship and the time you took .

Answer 3

Many states have laws stating that if a teacher has reasonable suspicion that abuse is taking place, even self-abuse, then you are legally obligated to call your local Department of Child and Family Services (or whatever it's called in your area). Nothing is 100% sure right now but it seems that you have reasonable evidence that she's a cutter. People who cut themselves rarely hurt themselves seriously, but why wait to see if that happens?

First of all, speak immediately to your supervisor at school. If something happens to this child and you did nothing, you could be liable. Ask your supervisor's advice on how to proceed. However, if he/she says ignore it, then ignore him/her and call the state like I said above.

You can talk to the girl, but chances are she won't suddenly open up and admit to cutting herself, especially because teachers are often viewed as the enemy. Also, calling home is an option but will likely lead nowhere for the same reasons. Just make sure you talk to somebody ASAP, for her sake and for yours.

Answer 4

What a caring human being you! You need to discuss this with another adult as most of the other answers suggest about the best way forward. But try and make friends with her and encourage your friends to do the same. Mind (for better mental health) produce a booklet called Understanding Self-harm. This can be found at mind.org.uk

Answer 5

If there is a school counciller ask them what to do, self harming is a complex and difficult thing to deal with, if you try to deal with it you risk making things worse when the child has to move up a class, and you can no longer spend the time with her she needs, she will just be left feeling abandoned take it to someone who knows what to do and will be in a solid position for the rest of this girls school life.

Answer 6

Yes, please talk to her, those cuts and scars are not natural. But dont talk about the scars to start, just talk generally and see if everything is ok. A child spends so much time at school and it is good you have noticed. If you dont get anywhere thr first time have a chat in a week or so. I expect she needs someone like you (who's not family) to open up to anyway.
.

Answer 7

Self harm is an indicator of severe stress or depression. She needs professional help. It may be an indicator of abuse at home. You should refer up the management chain in your school for advice on how to involve social services or the mental health team. Also are the parents aware? They need to be informed and involved.

Answer 8

Talk to her parents. She needs help. You can also check out this site twloha.com (to write love on her arms). I work with troubled youth and have dealt with many cutters. It is a sign of a more serious problem. The girl needs to be in therapy as soon as possible..

Answer 9

I believe you do need to act on this, to be self-harming the girl most be very unhappy and if it is not self-harm it could be abuse. Do you have counselling facilities at the school if so speak the them if not get advice for your Senior.
Hope this works out.

Answer 10

Contact either the principal, school nurse or counselor with what you suspect is going on. If you are a teacher, you owe it to this girl to do something. Don't ignore it. If it's a mistake, it's a mistake, but better safe than sorry.