recently married, made husband give up his subsription to playboy and penthouse. Insecure or right on my part?
2007-07-10 10:20:45 · 48 answers · asked by rainydaze 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
both
2007-07-10 10:22:22 · answer #1 · answered by vinny 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2016-07-26 13:37:36 · answer #2 · answered by Paige 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insecure.\
Erotica is simply an alternative form of sexual arousal; it is harmless fantasy and nothing more.
Regarding fantasy, Helen Fisher ("The First Sex," Ballantine Books, Feb. 2000) says that 71 percent of men and 72 percent of women fantasize while having sex with a partner. Men fantasize about conquest and domination, women about submission and surrender.
Dr. Joyce Brothers says, "It might relieve some of your guilt to know that many happily married individuals who have no thought or intention of ever betraying their spouse have sexual fantasies about someone other than their spouse."
Both men and women (single and in a relationship) have shown a desire to enjoy erotica in some form.
Women should take note that there is a very successful series of erotic anthologies called "Herotica." The stories are all written by female authors - not male!
The latest estimates are that Americans now spend somewhere around $10 billion a year on adult entertainment, which is as much as they spend attending professional sporting events, buying music or going out to the movies.
As long as a partner is taking care of his/her obligations and responsibilities (job, family) and seeing that the other person is being fulfilled sexually, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with enjoying alternative forms of arousal.
If he is fulfilling you sexually, give him some privacy and space to indulge in a little fantasy. Your relationship is not at risk.
2007-07-10 10:40:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Penthouse is nothing but a trash mag. Playboy actually has good articles sometimes. I know its cliche or whatever but it's true to some guys.
so not about the penthouse but if he has that one chances are the playboy was for the same reason. let him get maxim instead.
2007-07-10 10:24:17 · answer #4 · answered by jedi46300 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are right. He doesn't need to view those magazines any more now that he is married. It is a form of mentally cheating, and that, to me, is the same as doing the act itself. Don't fall for that excuse that "I just read it for the articles." After I got married over 20 years ago, I took all of my husband's smut magazines and burned them in the barbecue pit. If he ever tries buying one again, I will shred it & shove it up his you-know-what. He will not expose me to gutter smut. I am glad you took a stand. Don't let anyone tell you that you're insecure either. That has nothing to do with it. Married men shouldn't need to look at other naked women. If they do, they shouldn't be married. You did good.
2007-07-10 10:28:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that was the right decision for you, it is not the fact that it is a problem the issue is that you have a problem with it. Marriage is full of compromises and anyone who is not willing to make compromises that are reasonable are not really in a relationship that is a partnership, looking at dirty pictures that are of women that not only airbrushed to be perfect but surgically altered to do so is grossly unfair to the rest of us who are insecure enough as it is without the constant reminders that there are illusions of better. If I am not enough for my man, then why is he with me? Love is seeing the faults and the blessings and loving both equally and because of them not in spite of them, so you go girl!
2007-07-10 10:27:14 · answer #6 · answered by carpathian mage 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why would you do that, did he ask you to give up something? Are you so insecure about yourself and your relationship that he can't look at naked ladies? You realize that now if he does want to look at naked chicks he will have to sneak around to do it. Like on the internet or something. At least he was doing it out in the open, now who knows what will happen. Peeping at the neighbors, maybe? Checking out websites on the internet are worse than a few magazines.
2007-07-10 10:37:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
since you are newly married, I say insecure and that is ok. Your husband will have to help you with your insecurities. In my case, my wife got me a subscription of playboy after we had been married a couple of years. I gave and give her enough reasons every day to feel confident, secure, beautiful and sexy about herself. Been married for 10 years.
To add to that, for now your husband should only be interested in seeing you naked :O)
2007-07-10 10:27:18 · answer #8 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insecure!!!! It's ludicrous to think that just because you are married that you get to choose what your spouse reads. Marriage is a coupling of two individuals not a merging of two people into one. Good to see your making demands early, sure that will go over well in the long run.
2007-07-10 10:48:58 · answer #9 · answered by irish_savage 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be ready for a storm of controversy on this one! It can show insecurity on your part, but the other side of the coin is that if he has you, why should he be looking at other naked women? But since you "made" him give those up, he may resent it and even sneak Internet pr0n. There may be a serious discussion between you two coming up.
2007-07-10 10:25:00 · answer #10 · answered by Stormbringer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Way insecure !!!!!
I think I'd go for an annullment if I was him !!!
God - if your that controlling now, what's he got to look forward to in the future ......... A nagging / b*tching / fridgid wife. No thank you.
Oh well - he's probably too young and too whipped to understand his prediciment right now. And by the time he does, he'll have a mortgage and you'll have popped out a couple puppies, so he CAN'T get out without it causing him financial ruin.
What a sucker !!!
2007-07-10 10:34:44 · answer #11 · answered by aa889d 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋