My dad just got married again.....?

Question

My dad just got married again and I don't really like my new step-mom. She is really controlling, fusses about everything, and is lazy. I know that my dad is somewhat happy, but when I went over there the other day, he was threatening to call off the wedding. I really dislike her, but want to respect her for my dad's sake, and want it in return from her too. What do I do?

Answer 1

I have been in your shoes about 2 times. My dad was crazy about this lady and to be she was the devil. ME and my father had a very close a relationship, i was the apple of his eye, some ppl who didnt really know me but knew them told my dad I was just being a jealous daughter but those who knew me knew something was wrong. I never had problems with his previous girlfriends except for this one.

At the time I was 16 and honestly I didnt talk to her much, all i saw was a person who was using my dad and on top of that she was awful looking. I tried speaking to my dad but he was the happiest I ever seen, he sat me down a few times and I alway told him how I felt. But as a child I felt that it was her responsibility to talk to me and start the relationship.

Then 2 years later, he proposed. I didnt know how to react but if he was happy I was too. I felt like it was time for us (me and his wife) to have a relationship. 2 months before the wedding we start "hanging out", she was actually a cool person. Then a week before the wedding she got sick and then 3 days after their wedding date she died. (they never got married) I was so devastated. Now I some what regret not getting to know her. We had our differences and my dad explained why we didnt get along, a previous relationship, her ex chose his daughter over her and she was scared of me.

Now my dad was gonna get married to his ex before this lady and honestly shes puttin him threw hell. He opened his eyes and left her.

So sit down, speak to the both of them and try to get to know her. If you still feel that way, than no one cant change that. When she comes around say hi and bye, just give her that much respect no one is going to force you to do anything.

Answer 2

You don't say her age BUT in my age range (50 +/_ 10 years) only having 50 lovers might just put you on the low end. I do know women my age with less than 10 but I also know ones that top 100. The number of partners isn't what I would designate as what makes a woman a "ho" but her character in how and who she is doing. Although she may be a gold digger like you think, give her a chance to at least be polite to you and you be polite to her. You don't need to be her best friend, just friendly for Dad's sake. Her true colors will show out over time. Good Luck and let's hope there isn't a number 6!

Answer 3

Tara--your dad is remarrying and this is a grown up issue--so try to understand that part of it--he wants companionship and security---he is not considering you and how it will affect you. She will be a new "mom" to you--and the growing pains will be tough--so don't be a baby and fight this whole thing--they are adults and you are a kid--- fighting the issue will make it a lot more difficult if not impossible---time to relax, let them do what they are going to do--wish them a lot of luck and then just be nice--try to be positive and keep your future in mind--you still have to do good in school--that is the key to your future ---and your escape when you reach the age of 18--then you can leave and live your own life. Get a little job--save up the money--don't buy stupid stuff-- save for the future. Learn to talk with courtesy and respect--yelling and screaming and crying is childish---be mature---try to be agreeable.---try to take responsibility around the house--help with stuff before being asked--avoid all the pettiness. Keep your room neat--that is the one place you can have peace and quiet and relief. Keep looking to the future and you will do just fine--be nice relax and good luck

Answer 4

You have a meeting with her and your father. Let her know to keep everyone happy and for the sake of you father you are willing to respect her but you will also like the in return from her too.

Just be the bigger person

Answer 5

Since you don't live with them, it's totally your dad's decision if he wants to marry her or not. I'd try to be as friendly as possible when you're in their presence, but keep your distance the rest of the time. If your dad can find some happiness in his life, then let him, and get on with yours.

Answer 6

You're dad's a grown man who has already been through one divorce. He should know what he does and doesn't want. If he's still having trouble figuring it out, he shouldn't get married again.

Answer 7

I know your dad loves this Woman, But he should ask you what you feel about er before he goes off in Marries some Woman you don`t like try talking to him in maybe he will understand.

Answer 8

have a talk with her, NOT your dad, tell her how you feel and let her know that you arent going to go tell your dad to dump her but if she makes visiting unpleasent you will stop visiting and when he asks why you havn't been comming around you'll tell him about this conversation, and ask her if she really wants your dad to make a choice between his daughter and his gf does she really think she stands a chance?

Answer 9

well, sounds like maybe you need to get to know your dads new wife a little better. maybe spend some one on one time with her. have you talked to your dad about how you feel?? as a step mom, i know its not always easy .... for either side.
just be open to learning to accept her, as she learns to accept you and your habits. dont force it, but do put effort into making a friendship.

Answer 10

well, you are your dad's child...not hers...let your dad know how you feel and let him know that you will always support him being happy but, you will not communicate much with his wife because she is not healthy for you to be around. you want positive around you and she is not someone that you want a relationship with. you can still speak to her and be cordial without being all friendly and fake with her.