My 17 year old is just getting his license this month. Doesn't have a job & isn't trying too hard to find one. I swear that boy will get out of the car and not even shut the door.
We have to remind him to take the trash out EVERY day & today he blew off an appointment that I just reminded him of last night. We bought him a car, but he won't even go out and start it. No interest in girls - or boys for that matter.
He loves nothing more than playing a certain game on the internet & I'm worried a lot of problems are stemming from that.
My husband wants to completely shut off the internet, computer, XBox, and PS2 (which are all in his room) until he gets it together and starts showing responsibility.
I'm trying to get him to realize it's important to to do what you need to do because it's the right thing to do - not because you're punished if you don't. HOWEVER.... I am so exhausted and at the end of my rope.
Is this normal for teenage boys? Is my husband right?
2007-07-10 07:10:57 · 26 answers · asked by nite_angelica 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
You should try getting someone he respects to tell him all this things, someone he'll listen. Maybe a friend of his, or some relative he likes. Don't take all that stuff from him, but make a daily schedule like 2 hours Internet, 1 hour PS2... This is not supposed to be normal for teenage kids, but it is getting more and more frequent. Why don't you try finding him a job.
2007-07-10 07:19:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's somewhat normal for teenage boys... not to that extent though. Your husband is right. You need to get your son's butt in gear. He's 17. Instead of acting like he's 13, he should be preparing himself for the 'real world'. By this I mean doing such things as finding a job. Your son needs a reality check.Some time away from the video games and internet will do him good. He needs to start showing at least some signs of responsibility. You shouldn't have to remind him to do everything, he should be doing it on his own. He may be angry and upset with you at first, but it's so much better for him in the long run.
Then, once he starts acting more responsible and more like an adult, maybe you could make a daily schedule for him to be playing video games... maybe like 2 hours a day, or something like that.
2007-07-10 07:35:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In These times Many Boys( And Girls now) are starting to get hooked on Computers,Xbox,PS all of that. Its normal, but if all he does is that then it is unhealthy. In the long run it could cause him visual problems. Some of these kids experience Low Self Esteem because they dont get as much contact with other people as they should.This low self esteem could stem many other problems also. I suggest do something about the Game Systems and try to encourage him to go out more, maybe for a run at the park or something that will keep him busy from the computer.
2007-07-10 07:18:05 · answer #3 · answered by Megan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my honest and non professional except for being a mom and knowning many addicts and an internet addict my self. Id' say you have an addict of some sorts on your hands.
If all he is doing is playing a game on the internet, and seems to do nothing else and nothing else is getting his attention it's time to get him some serious help!
Your husband is right. Time to pull all the systems out of his room including the computer. Get in him into councling. There is a problem and a big one at that. This is very unusual for any teenager.
I've been there with my daughter who is now 15, and at one point was very addicted to the internet. To the point that if we planned something she would throw a fit over it because she couldn't be near a computer. We were lucky to catch it early and stop it when we did. It was a matter of talking with her as well as taking the internet out of our home. And when she did use it it was only at the library when we took her and the time limit was an hour. She's learned to use the internet for fun and not to allow it to rule her life.
2007-07-10 07:45:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were in your situation I would definately think about doing what your husband wants to do. He is not showing responsibility for anything. It basically sounds like everything he does revovles around the internet. Take away his games and consoles and car as well at least for a week. That will definately get him.
He needs to learn that his responsibilities come first before his games or car. Just tell him that once he is able to put his chores and what ever else needs to be done first, then he can have all that back.
2007-07-10 07:29:50 · answer #5 · answered by laranita82 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hate to burst your bubble, angelica, but if communication and discipline weren't instilled in him all along before he turned 17, hard chance it's going to work and open things up for the family now.
you don't say if he's an ony child or what....
the bad news is:
could be he might be a closet alcoholic or other kind of drug stimulant/depressant user...
yet even without those, could be he has some serious issues that he can't or doesn't know how to deal with...and he's only being rebellious as his way of coping...
of course there are a host of other things to consider, yet of it all, the good news is:
you are not alone in any of this; you and your husband seem to be good people; however if his actions and attitude worsen in spite of punishments and attempts at disciplines --
well best to seek out counseling and more professional help in your local area than you'll find here on anything YA!
good luck to you, your husband, your son and your family!
peace out!
2007-07-10 07:37:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take away the games and the internet, and make him have to earn use of the computer. The computer should be placed in the family room so that you can monitor his usage. He should have to earn the right to use the computer, and sell the car! Make him do chores to earn time on the computer, say 10 minutes for taking out the garbage, 20 minutes for doing the dishes etc...or 1/2 hour of usage for every hour at work (make him show you his paystub!)-this is all outside of homework of course!
2007-07-10 15:19:32 · answer #7 · answered by my 2 cents 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is between two things: Either he is depressed or he is addicted to gaming. Both are possibilities. I would start by not only getting rid of the internet but completely taking away all this gaming things. Also, don't let him use the car unless he gets a job.
2007-07-10 07:16:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He needs a giant push to get him going. Obviously all he cares about is his video games and internet. Take those away and he will know that you are serious. 17 yr old boys tend to be lazy. When I was that age, I was lazy. I'll admit that. But sooner or later he has to learn that there are more things in life than just video games and such. Let him know what is up and try and straighten him out.
2007-07-10 07:16:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Ohhhhh yes. That is so normal. My brother is 20 years old and still forgets his cell phone at home, even though he is reminded a million times through out the day.
My once told me that it was because he was afraid to move on in his life and that he just wants to stay kid forever.
Talk with him about it. Tell him that he's going to receive a conversation from you whether he likes it or not.
2007-07-10 07:30:46 · answer #10 · answered by *~*RaChAel*~* 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋