help me help her?

Question

So me and my ex broke up about a month ago she was living overseas
and has been back to the states for 2 weeks now
She broke up with me because i lied to her (no cheating tho) but since
she got back to the state she started going out with someone else and she has
been in a relationship with this person for 2 weeks and last nite was the first time we had seen each other since december we were supose to talk and fix our
problems and just plain talk so we could end up being friends...

Well one thing led to another and we ended up making out and just plain cheating on her new relationship we both know its wrong ...and she now says she wants to
be with me but she feels bad for this other person bc this person has fallen for her already and she doesnt wanna hurt em.

Im trying to be fair and i wanna help her understand or help her find out how she could break up with this person she says she loves me ..but doesnt know what she feel about this person..

to me this other person is nothing but a rebound...

help me come out with good advice for her

we both feel bad about the cheating..it was never meant tohappend

i know i cant make her decision for her i just wanted to hear some words of wisdom ....she complains about this person n she really doesnt know why she is with them bt she says she loves me ....

Answer 1

You want to help, don't help. By giving a solution to the problem, no matter how it works out, it will be your fault.

Your best answer is that you will support what ever decision she makes.

Answer 2

You lie and she cheats......I dont know about everyone else, but to me you seem like the perfect couple! Tell her that because you lie and she cheats that you all are meant to be. Tell her to drop the guy who doesnt lie.
Reality dude: Why would you want a chick that cheats? This is what is going to happen. She is going to string both of you along and in a few months you are going to come back out here and have another question like "why cant I make this girl love me and stop cheating?"
Acknowlege that she doesnt love you, and then move on and find a chick who doesnt cheat. There are millions of them out there.

Answer 3

Stop wasting your time. Memorize this and live by it: one chance per lifetime per person. No exceptions ever.

You didn't have a fight. You broke up. And she is dating somebody else. It can never be the great relationship you could have if you move on and find the right woman.

Throw her number away, cut your losses, and if she ever calls, tell her you are too busy to talk to her. Next.

Find a woman who respects you and is really interested in you. This one doesn't respect you, and she isn't that interested in you. You know how I can tell? She broke up with you and is dating somebody else. Jeez, be a man for Goodness' sake.

Answer 4

If she's only been with person #2 for a couple of weeks, then breaking up should be easy!
She should just say that she never got over you and that she doesnt think it's fair to lead him on like that when she still has feelings for you

Answer 5

i think that if she really wants to be with you that you should just let her figure out exactly what she wants... if she truely doesnt like that other guy and as u said hes just a rebound then she should break up with him.. i know that sounds mean but in the long run its the best thing to do bc its better then having him fall deeper inlove with her if she doesnt have feelings for him bc she has feelings 4 u... just tell her that you'll be patient and b there for her no matter what.

Answer 6

ITs only a two week relationship. She should be able to easily break it off. Have her Tell him the truth on why she is breaking up, No sense in hiding it. Two weeks is too new of a relationship , she wouldnt know how she feels about him yet. So break up now with him, the sooner the less complicated it will be later.

Answer 7

She obviously feels something for him otherwise she wouldn't care about hurting him. The best thing for her to do is take a week break from both of you so she can sort her head out and decide what she really wants!

Answer 8

She has to sort her feeling out to be fair to you, her and the innocent third person. Be gentle but tell her to have a break from the both of you and to sort herself out. To be fair to you all, you all need to be happy. If she isn't happy with you then just accept it and move on.
Everything happens for a reason but sometimes it takes a while for it to become clear.

Answer 9

It's all dating really, and that means that she can decide to stop dating one man and re-start dating another if she so chooses. If you and her and serious about giving your relationship another try, then she should break things off with the guy she has been seeing for the last two weeks. She should be honest and tell him that she has re-connected with her ex (who is you) and that she wants to see where it leads.

Answer 10

If the new guy she's seeing has already fallen in love with her and it's only been 2 weeks that's a red flag in my opinion.

Yes, it will hurt the other guy if she breaks it off with him, but if the two of you want to be together then BE together. If you're in love then you'll still be in love whether you're together or not, and which is worse - for her to break up with him or for her to stay with him and continue to be in love with you?

Good luck!