mom smoking help!!?

Question

my mom has a prescription from her doctor to quit smoking, but she won't use it cause she still wants to smoke! she goes through more than a pack a day, and i found out dogs can get cancer too!!! which isn't suprising cause my former dog died of nasal cancer. :( she smokes everywhere!!! i can't stand it! it limits me to stay in my room all day or go outside because i can't even go downstairs without smelling smoke!!! she puts my whole family at risk of cancer, and i care about my mom. i don't want her to die of cancer or anything either. sometimes i just feel like throwing all the lighters, ashtrays, and cigarettes away! but i won't because i'll get into trouble. i yell at her everyday, but she doesn't care. she says she will pick a day to quit, but it has been over a year, and she has smoked for more than 20 years!!!! i want help!

Answer 1

I wish I couold help you - I am going through the same exact problem except it's my mom, dad, aunt and grandmother - i know, it's madness (and none of them are even trying to quit). I don't want to smoke because it is disgusting and can kill you (plus makes you smell bad). I suggest to trying to calmly discuss with your mom the fact that she is putting you and your family in danger of the risk of getting second hand smoke. Tell her that it can kill her or she can end up with lung cancer and that you are really worried about her health and wants her and you (and your family) to be healthy and won't be in danger from second hand smoke. I hope I helped, and good luck (I only wish that my own advise would work for my family :( )

Answer 2

I'm sorry about your situation. I was in the same boat, but my mom eventually died of lung cancer. Throwing everything away will not work because she will just go buy more. I did that with my mom, too. Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do. You can beg, plead, yell, whatever, but it won't do any good. My mom had 2 heart attacks, had cholesterol that was through the roof, high blood pressure....all from smoking and that was 10 years before she died. The doctors told her quit and she pretending to, but still smoked and smoked up to the day she died, even while on oxygen. It still makes me mad because I feel like I should have been a reason for her to want to live. I feel like it was a slow form of suicide. I also felt like she didn't care. She died when I was 22 and it hurts me so much to think that she won't be around when I get married, have a baby, etc. You may tell your mom that....that you need her around and you want her to be there on your wedding day, the day you have a baby, etc. Don't expect it to change her, though.

Answer 3

I don't smoke anything. So pot was not an option for me. With that said I really do not have a problem with those that choose to do pot. I feel the same way about it as people that smoke. Please don't do it in my house, or in a confined area where I can't get away from it. I really do not want it around my kids. I think pot is safer then alcohol. I have known people that smoked pot. The majority of them did it to relax which meant they were hanging out at home. I feel that it should be legalized as that would kill a HUGE crime industry. Not much point in smuggling it over the borders or having secret deals with individuals when that person can run down to the local convenient store and pick it up. It could also be extra income for the governments as they could profit off it. I don't think it should be done while children are being watched. Like any substance, regardless of how mild it may be, it can impair your judgement. =)

Answer 4

Well, yelling doesn't help. That will only make her more determined to smoke. What you need to do is sit down with her and tell her that you want her to be your Mom for a really long time. It has to be her decision to quit because as you can see, it is not easy and only she can decide she wants to be smoke free. Ask her what you can do to help. Maybe you can take walks together in the evening. What she needs to do is get some white plastic drinking straws, cut them the length of a cigarette, stuff them with cotton, and place them all over the house in clean ashtrays. I did this and it works. Then she can "smoke" them when she wants. Not only does she have to break the nicotine addition, she has to break the "hand to mouth" addiction. She doesn't want to replace that with food. I quit this way. And I had one of the plastic straw cigarettes in my car. I did it for months until I could give up the fake ones, too.

Answer 5

Amanda ... I totally understand what you are going through as my parents were/are in the very same boat. Yelling at your Mom will not help her to quit. it will only make her tune you out. The best thing for you to do is be supportive during this. Bring home or print up information on the new ways there are to quit and make sure she knows that you will be there for her.
It is an addiction and if she has smoked for 20 years it will be a very difficult one to stop. There are so many options for smokers now that she CAN be successful but it may take a while to find one that works for her.
Instead of yelling ... LISTEN to her and let her know how you feel as well but gently. Most smokers hate the fact that they smoke as much as us non-smokers hate to be around those who do.
Good luck to you and your Mom, I wish you all the best!

Answer 6

You can be straight forward with her and make her explain why she cannot quit. Record it, then play it back and ask her if that sounds realistic.
Find out what she use to enjoy doing and ask her why she was able to stop that.
You can have her play a game like monopoly or a card game and set a high point goal, then after about 30 minutes ask her if she would like to stop, if she says yes ask her why she could quit that but not smoking.
My mother has said she quit smoking due to the fact I asked her "If Uncle James, Aunt Margaret, and Daddy can quit smoking why can't you." She said she could never answer the question so she quit. That was 41 years ago.

Answer 7

I can tell you love your Mom very much, and I can certainly
understand your concern for her health as well as the health
of the rest of your family.
Second hand smoke is a considerable risk. Has anyone
spoken gently to your Mom and asked her if she would at
least consider smoking outside so she is not putting the health of her loved ones at risk?
That said, it is not easy for someone addicted to nicotine to
stop smoking, though many have done so---for health reasons of their own, or for the sake of their loved ones.

Nagging, scolding, hollering, or threatening people who
smoke does not help them to quit. Often, loved ones become frustrated with the smoker and revert to such tactics out of concern that hedges on desperation.

I found a couple of sites online that offer assistance to those
who have a loved one that is smoking---but you love them
so much you want them to stop.

Here they are:
http://www.health.ri.gov/disease/tobacco/helpingothers.php

and
https://www.cbn.com/LivingTheLife/Features/MiscTips/Quit
Smoking.aspx

Do what you can do, and then focus your energy on your
health and happiness. Hopefully, with your strong feelings
regarding your mother's addiction, you will not be tempted
to smoke yourself. That is one good and positive thing.

I wish you success as you attempt to do a good thing for your
Mom.....but remember only she can make the decision to
stop.

Take good care of you!

Doris
[e-mail]

Answer 8

Would your mom let you smoke a cigarrette? If not then she needs to stop smoking inside the house, because you are getting just as much of the toxins and nicotine as she is when she lights up in the same room as you.

Ask her if she could at least only smoke outside, and not in the house or the car.

Answer 9

if you don't mind me asking how old are you because i used to have the same problem...... when i was younger i used to come home crying saying i was being teased for having everything smelling like smoke and my mom felt terrible. But when i got too old to cry i used to multiply how many cigarettes she would smoke a week...... she got mad but she really was bothered so if you have a lil sibling have them come home crying.... they love the innocent! but if not..... try being annoying or just have a true heart-to- heart with her and tell her how much your effected by this. Your mother love you and you need to show her you care!! best of luck!

Answer 10

throw everything away on her..she'll be mad now, but in a couple months she'll be thanking you