I am a mother of four that has been a stay at home mom for 13 years now. I am suppose to be going back to school this fall. I am going back to become a LPN it has always been a dream of mine to become a nurse. The problem I'm running into is that everyone, but my kids think that I am being selfish. They fill this way because we are in a very bad financial situation right now and they think I should get a job instead of going back to school. My husband's family is really putting me down and making me fill bad for it, they say I'm putting too much on my husband. That he shouldn't have to be the only one that works. I think that they aren't seeing the bigger picture, if I went to work tommorow it would have to be a minimum wage job and after I finish school I would have a very well paid profession, one that I can be proud to have. ur probably wondering what my husband thinks, to be honest I think he fills the same as his family does. Please help, tell me what u'd do in my situation.
2007-07-09 16:01:10 · 10 answers · asked by earthwater_76 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I had to take a test inorder to enroll and I scored okay. I got a 98 in reading a 90 in writing and a 80 in math. They told me that was just fine.
2007-07-09 17:00:08 · update #1
You can never go wrong with education my dear, and you said it yourself..."the bigger picture", your husband might not see it now, but would sure enjoy it when the time comes. Do what, as a mother, you feel is right for your family. Either get a dead end minimun wage job or sacrifice a year or two in school and not only have a better job and a career but also realise a dream.
Good luck!!!
2007-07-09 17:07:00 · answer #1 · answered by Chula167 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. That's a hard situation. While I would like to say that you can never go wrong by furthering your education, I don't feel right in saying this because you have no support system at home. Nursing school isn't easy and the demands that it makes on your time makes you crazy. I don't know how you can do this without any help on the home front. You are going to need a lot of free time to study if you are going to pass. Your husband will need to help you with the kids too. I hope that you will be able to talk with him and tell him that this is your passion; that your dreams didn't die when you got married and had a family.
This country has a shortage of nurses so you will be needed anywhere you decide to work. Also, you will make more after you graduate than you will ever make in a min. wage job. I don't know what advice I can offer to you, but I hope everything works out for you and your family. Don't give up.
Good luck.
2007-07-09 23:13:03 · answer #2 · answered by getusedtoit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a classic financial decision problem. You have to spend money to earn more, or you stay with a less desirable choice. When you take the other parameters into account, you have 4 kids and a husband probably not earning much, you would be digging a bigger hole in hope of something better. Priority should be on your kids first because you brought them to this world. You should have planned things better --- 4 kids and stay home with minimal education. People will chastise me for saying that but your life now takes second to your kids and family needs because you have to take responsibility for what you didn't do before.
One more thing. Are you confident that you are good enough to be admitted and finish the program? Or it is just a dream and you really aren't sure of your proficiency?
2007-07-09 23:28:32 · answer #3 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You all need to have a family talk about this; your kids aren't old enough to understand that you are going back to school to get an education to get a better paying job. They don't understand the ramifications of being stuck in a minimum wage position. They are the ones acting selfish, not you.
2007-07-09 23:04:56 · answer #4 · answered by chrstnwrtr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your kind of in a sticky situation. Honestly, you and your husband should sit down and talk this out. If you go to school, maybe get a part time job to help out while you are in school maybe a waitress job on weekends or selling avon or something that you can do from home to help out with the financial situation. I definitely would stop worrying about what everyone else says. you aren't married to them. talk with your husband. Best of luck and if you deside to go good luck in school.
2007-07-09 23:13:24 · answer #5 · answered by cheoli 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what really matter is your decision... discuss it with you family (meaning kids and husband only) that you have already sacrificed 13 years of your life by being their slave (methaporically speaking) tell them that what you are going to do will also benefit them in the long run, just a little sacrifice (how many months?) your kids attitude towards it speaks of influences from your in-laws (don't know about your husband) you are not "putting" too much on your husband, didn't he "put" too much on you when he saddled you with four kids? did he finished his studies? did he stopped work so that you will be the one to work and he will be the one to take care of the kids? everyone has to go through a lot of sacrifices to achieve their hearts desire. maybe, your kids are scared because your attention will not be totally focused on them (or because they won't have someone to slaved over, like picking up their mess, washing their clothes, unless you've already trained them to clean up on their own) same goes for your husband. change always gives us apprehension, it's how you deal with it, how you embrace it, that you can be satisfied (or nearly satisfied) with your life. do you want to grow old wondering what might have been?
good luck
2007-07-09 23:26:15 · answer #6 · answered by unhappily married 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband is OK with it then you and he have made a family decision about your future. Is there any possible way you can get a part-time job to at least defray some costs? Are there some on-line classes you can take to help defray cost and then you can be home for child care? How about his family kick in and help with child care, etc.... instead of making you feel badly for wanting to improve the sitaution for your family.
2007-07-09 23:09:51 · answer #7 · answered by Cloee Quips 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LPN if I'm not mistaken make really good money. They quite frankly are tunnel visioned. If you can tough it out until you get your LPN license your financial problems will go away.
Simple minded people rarely if ever see the big picture.
2007-07-09 23:11:02 · answer #8 · answered by Buffet4life 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen to your kids. In this matter, their wisdom exceeds that of their elders. Look for scholarships and get a Stafford loan to pay your tuition and help with the bills.
2007-07-09 23:08:25 · answer #9 · answered by nightserf 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
DON'T SECOND GUESS THIS DECISION.
GO BACK TO SCHOOL!!!!
don't listen to the bs that others lay on you. do what you have to do to better yourself and your children and your family!!!
GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!!
more women should do what you are doing!!!!!!!!
2007-07-09 23:07:52 · answer #10 · answered by KRIS 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋