For Older Adults?

Question

What would you like to have known at age of 20, that you happen to discover about life as you have become more experienced?

im not asking this question to 20 year olds but to 40 or older as I might have written my question alittle confusing.

Answer 1

I'm only 27, but there are many things I wish I knew at age 20 that I discovered later in life.

The first being that I was a smart, attractive girl. I was so judgemental of myself that I never allowed myself to have the confidence I deserved. I was thin (nearly underweight for my height) and pretty, but all I could ever see was my flaws. It's true what they say. You are never as fat as you imagine. Don't become obsessed with fashion, weight, or looks at all. It really cheapens life for those who can't see past that stuff. And if you keep bringing it up to others, soon they WILL be able to see your faults as you do.

Second - the only thing you are in control of is yourself. Learn to let go and be more go-with-the flow. Do your best to create the best possible circumstances for yourself, but then be willing to make adjustments without stressing out. My father in law has a great quote - "Let's make a plan, and then play it by ear". You'll be much happier, healthier, and positive if you learn to bend.

That said, discover the things you WON'T bend on, and then DON'T bend on them!

The third is that life really is what you make of it. It's all about attitude and perspective. If you don't want to be bored, don't be boring. Always be doing something worthwhile, and make sure that at least HALF of what you do is selfless.

pay attention to others. Try to anticipate what they want/need without them having to ask you. Listen to them without trying to prescribe a solution or change the subject back to how you relate. Let go of yourself and just LISTEN. If they want help, you'll know it. And if you really listened, you'll be able to give it wisely. But most often, people just want someone to relate to them so they don't feel so alone in their own thoughts.

Stay organized. Especially with your personal space (cleanliness is mostly maintenance!) and your schedule. It's not nerdy to keep a calendar if it means you won't always be the one half an hour late or the one to forget the important events.

Make a big deal. Family traditions, holidays, birthdays, a friend's good news, etc. Make it a big deal. FILL your days with these little adventures.

Be loyal. But also - don't be afraid to walk away. Don't hand your time and emotional energy over to someone who consistently abuses it. Be ever loyal to your good friends, but be ever watchful for those who pretend to be your good friends but really suck you dry.

you are never stuck. We are creatures of change. Always look for ways you would like to change, and take control of that. Always be improving. Always be learning something.

Be in charge of your own education. Even in college, nobody but you can make you learn. If you go to college, savor that experience. You'll miss it when it's over.

Be quick to forgive.

Especially yourself.

Answer 2

Oh, my. Well, I am an "elderly" person on social (in)security, so I can think of a number of things.
First, inflation is a terrible force; what I could live on when I was 20 (less than $1,000.00 a year) is not enough for the groceries and utilities and other expenses for one month. An older house then sold for $800 to $3,500; cars with V8, factory air, tinted glass, etc., went for $2,000...I could live on what I earned and save money. No more.
Second, well, for sure I have found that what I considered important when I was 20 I now find are trivial, such as my "collections" of books, records, etc. What is really important are the people in my life, my wife and sons foremost.
Third, education is meaningless. A master's degree not only doesn't guarantee a good job, it makes it more difficult to find a good paying job because so many employers will say, "You are over-qualified!" What really counts is what you learn in the "school of hard knocks" --- real life. (Over the years I have known many others with master's degrees, even doctorate degrees, out building houses, selling cars, houses, whatever. In the Army, from high school drop outs to master's degrees we were all doing the same thing!)
Fourth, enjoy your life today; tomorrow it may be too late! You could die, or become disabled, lose your mind to Alzheimers, or whatever. Don't live beyond your means, but don't waste money on meaningless possessions when you could enjoy life with your family and friends.
There is so much more, but I think this highlights it.

Answer 3

In approaches, I absolutely feel the more youthful adults. They are given such a lot know-how earlier than they begin ingesting approximately impaired riding, having a pal and reliable intercourse laws. These are even taught by way of the university a bit of bit. I feel that there's extra concentration now than there used to be whilst older adults have been more youthful, and ingesting even as underage is not a taboo. People speak approximately it (although it's a criminal offense) and mothers and fathers are extra accepting of selecting up there teenaged youngsters from events whilst they're inebriated, so they do not force house. I understand that I might inform my youngsters that if they're ingesting, pleasant, however name me whilst you're coming house and I will select you up - no questions requested. Anyways that's my opinion!

Answer 4

If I had known at 20 that teaching special education classes would be as stressful and tedious as it is, I would have never invested those 7-8 yrs to get a Masters in that field. Now I'm stuck in a career that is depleting my vitality and love of life. I'd like to make a career change now...but I am in my 40's, a parent and see no viable options for escape.

Answer 5

That I didn't have to marry the first kid I had sex with; to give myself time to develop my interests, abilities and skills before I got married. As it turned out, I was able to do those things between the age of 22 and 40; and to adopt a baby in my late 30's. Also, to have had help in looking at possibilities as a teenager. I'm 78 now, and in those days there were the standard student counselors and tests of abilities and interests, but I never paid much attention to them. I wanted travel and adventure, but as a young woman in the early '50's, had no idea how to implement them--other than to enlist in the Women's Army and my Dad nixed that! I HAVE had many adventures and am thankful for them all! I ended up teaching Kinders for 5 yrs; then working for 21 yrs as a therapist for very troubled adolescents.

Answer 6

A better treatment to women, now that I'm more experience I've learned that women should be treated in a better way than just to hang around for few days. Now I know how to look the inner beauty than the outer one, now I do know how to appreciate the feelings in a better way and I've learn that all women are beautiful some how. I wish I knew that at my 20's

I'm not 40, but I'm over 30.

Answer 7

Basically not to sweat the little things. Don't allow people to get to you. And accept the things you cannot change. I used to let others opinions affect me & now I've learned that I have no control of what others think & feel about me. And if they feel negatively about me, then it's their problem & I can't do anything about it. Of course, I'm always nice & kind and respectful of others. But I don't allow others to disrespect me. It's just that plain & simple. My life is a lot easier now than it was when I was 20. Good luck. 2D

Answer 8

that your 20 s go really really quickly, so live everyday to the full because one day you will wake up with a husband a few screaming children and a very very large mortgage and you will long for the good old days when you didnt have to plan 2 weeks in advance to go out for a few drinks with your friends,

Answer 9

Not to give my heart away too easily.
Believe in what people do not what they say. (even family)
Saving yourself for the right man has value.
Leopards do not change their spots.
Real estate is the best investment over time.
A good education is key.
Your life is whatever you make it and it takes careful planning.
Men think very differently to women.
There really is good and evil.
Learning continues every day.
People do not like to hear the truth.
The love you have for your child is the sweetest love.

Answer 10

My parents said I should be a lawyer, because I loved arguing with them all the time. I should have listened; instead of taking the easy way out. People that push themselves get places easier then those that wait for gravity to do it.