She is very secretive about what she's doing on there. She uses the site under an assumed name, so I can't even check that way. Should I even want to check? She excells in every other area and I have no reason not to trust her, but there's a little voice in my head that keeps nagging me with questions like: Why doesn't she want me to see what she's doing, etc. I've asked her and she assures me there's nothing to worry about.
I've thought about restricting her use, but I trust her and don't want her to think that I don't. Anybody else going through this?
2007-07-09 07:53:00 · 39 answers · asked by Bon Mot 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I have three teenage boys 13-16-17 and they all have my space pages... my way of keeping an eye on who and what is going on ...is to have a my space page myself and have had each one add me to theirs..... they are still allowed to go and be themselves with their friends but I can see thru my page...... And it is not being nosey or showing them you can't trust them...... it's keeping them safe..........also always have the computer in a central area of the home so you can see why they are using it.... letting kids have a computer in their room can be dangerous.....monitoring where they go and who they talk to is a smart way to allow them freedom with out dangers............ good luck
2007-07-09 08:00:19 · answer #1 · answered by mercy me 2 · 9⤊ 0⤋
Ok, here is my suggestion... i am not a mom of a teenager but i am 19 (married with a baby) and i know the mind of a teenage girl. 1. the fact that she excells in everything else does not matter when it comes down to boys, dating, and myspace. Myspace has become very inappropriate. 2. remember your motherly instincts! if you have a feeling something bad is going on then chances are they are. Your right there is no reason she should be hiding anything like a webpage from you especially one that chances are has her picture. there are too many pervs on there to allow a naive teen on there.
what i suggest you do is
1. if you have a good relationship with her and you trust her for the most part, then get on there and make a page yourself... have her even help you.... add her to your friends and that way you can see all her friends and comments that they leave and what she says on there.
2. Restrict the site or make her show hers to you everyday. including her mail..... make sure her age is right and make absolutely certaint that all her friends are people she knows no exceptions. not even bands because some bands will blog inappropriate things that a 15yr old doesnt need to read.
3. Most parental locks will block myspace... why? because it is not a good site for people under 18. yeah it helps you keep in touch with your friends and so does the phone and going to school and going outside your home!!
4. there is also a website that i heard some highschoolers at work looking at its called myyearbook.com, i took some time to take a look at it and it doesnt seem as bad but ther are still some photos that are a little much.
5. make it to where you have access to her page as well. username and password. that way her email can be checked as well.
i hope what i have said will help.
Good Luck!!
2007-07-09 08:19:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Ok....First of all Id like to point out that myspace is only unsafe it you let it be so for everyone saying stuff like its a deathtrap and its how strangers find out about your children why dont you just think about it. With or without out myspace, if your child wants to give away personal info he/she can just find another way to do it if they dont have a myspace.
Now to answer your question, Your daughter might have stuff on their that would seem inappropriate. I would tell her to let you have her password or, as another person suggested, create your own account and just check up on her profile(then you could see what everyone else does and she still gets some privacy) She would probably like the second choice better.
But then again, she is a teen and most teens just dont like their parents to know anything about them,whether good or bad. They feel as if their privacy is everything and that their parents need to stay out of their life.
I suggest that you check it out and then you decide. If she doesnt let you see it, threaten to take it away. If it ends up being bad, tell her if she cleans it up to your approval she can keep it but if she doesnt,it will be taken away.
Myspace really isnt that bad
and is a great way to keep in touch with people.
Good luck=)
2007-07-09 10:28:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be concerned. I have a myspace (I am 26) and have seen many young girls putting things on there that are not true, just to look "cool". They may put things like they have been drunk before and what type of sexual activity they like. If she is hiding her page under an assumed name, you can only assume she has something improper on there. I would definately take some type of action. Maybe tell her she can have a page as long as you can see it. If she refuses then tell her she cannot have a page. You can see if she gets on the site at your home. Most public places have these types of sites blocked. Good Luck!
2007-07-09 08:00:19 · answer #4 · answered by mom2rhylee 1 · 5⤊ 0⤋
My daughters are not at this age yet, but my concern is that she is being secretive about something. Websites like MySpace are a scary place for children, but she could be using caution. For example if she has her site set to private, then only her "friends" can see her page and send her comments. I would create your own account under an assumed name and try searching for her. Or if you know how to check your computer's history that may help you. Someone cannot tell who online is looking at their profile and chances are they are not looking at their own. If you get to her profile you can see her comments and who her "friends" are. This seams to me like secretly reading her diary because you are worried she won't talk to you. Sometimes a parent has to invade the privacy in order to find out things our children are not telling us.
Having an assumed name means she doesn't want just anyone to be reading her profile, so that is proactive on her part.
2007-07-09 08:03:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok, on the subject of the not liking boys section, she's you're daughter. Did you tell your mom and dad approximately all the crushes which you had? If she does have acquaintances, that's sturdy. yet perchance she's not spending time with others because of the fact she feels that they don't likely like her. Have any of them called to ask her to do something? that could desire to be the concern, is that she's waiting for them to call. coach her that to make a chum, she desires to be a chum. meaning she desires to %. up the telephone and dial their extensive type. If all else fails, pass to a counselor. attempt to make it a set element, and pass in there together with her so she isn't on my own. yet permit her be conscious of that if she desires to speak to the counselor on my own, with out you around to hearken to what she has to declare, then that option ought to be open.
2016-11-08 20:14:42 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes if she doesn't want you on there or shuts off the computer when you enter the room then you need to get onto her myspace and figure out who she is talking to. She could be posting naked pictures of herself on there or chatting with older men. She could be doing all sorts of bad things. There's some software you can buy that records all the Instant messenger conversations you have with someone so buy that and make sure you don't tell her about it. Print off all her old instant messenger conversations and shut down her myspace and block that site. Also block any other teen chatting site like hi-5, teenspot.com, icq.com, etc.
2007-07-09 10:23:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a 14 year old daughter and in order for her to be on myspace I have to know her password. It is very easy for someone to take advantage without them realizing it. I found some guy she just met on myspace trying to come over to our house to see her and she was soon grounded because she is only allowed to be friends with people she actually knows. I sent him an email on her myspace profile and told him he'd better move on or I'd have him reported to Myspace. Privacy is important but you pay for the internet service and the computer. It is your job to be the parent and listen to the little voice in your head - there are many instances when parents decide to turn away and fail to protect their child...just so they don't look like they are butting in. Just let her know that you've decided that you want to make sure that she is safe and you expect these rules to be followed just like the others... she won't like it but kids never like to be told what to do. You love her and her protection is the most important thing.
2007-07-09 08:13:15 · answer #8 · answered by DB 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay I am fourteen and have a myspace and don't want my mom to see because i don't want her to know what me and my friends talk about I don''t do anything bad or talk about anything bad and I'm really safe with it I just don't want my mom reading through my conversations especially since you can see every comment other people post on your myspace. I think your daughter just wants normal privacy. But if you are really worried about it you could go into her e-mails and find out her myspace url or just make her show you. Just because some people are stupid enought to give a stranger their adrress doesn't mean she is. And having it under a fake name is a good way to stop pedphiles from being ablle to track you down by just using your name.
2007-07-09 09:16:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay myspace isn't very good to have. There are weirdos on there and pedifiols. I do not car ewhat anyone says even if your page is private hackers can still get in. They find a way. You should block myspace from the computer, after talking to her. I know now that shes a teen, and alot of teens do exactly the opposite of what their parents tell them to do. You need to protect her until she is an adult. Because if anything happens to her you'll never be able to live with yourself. You'll have that weighing on your heart the reast of your life because you could have done soemthing to prevent it. Get a police officer and show her pictures of a crime scene where a teen was abducted and murdered because of meeting the person off of the internet. so good luck.
2007-07-09 08:13:09 · answer #10 · answered by Lady 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I am a mother myself, but I am confronting my brothers constantly to check on myspace, my nephews and nieces have things on there that I would punish my daughters for. They aren't bad kids and they don't realize there are people on there that want to take advantage of them. She is fine as long as you know where she is and isn't meeting anyone who you don't know.... Myspace is a great great positive place if used the right way. But, I would sit down with her if you haven't already and be "cool" as in... "II don't want to sound like I'm treating you as a little girl anymore, but I wan't you to know, that there are seriously disgusting individuals out there, especially online and I just need you to make sure you are watching out for them. Because I can't watch over you all time, I want to know that no one is causing any trouble, and if they are, I can take care of it if you need me to." that will make her feel like youre not overprotective and also, make her feel as if you trust her, but have her back if anything happens. She is being secretive because it is not "cool" to have mommy or daddy checking over you all the time, and there is probably talk about her crushes and boyfriends on there and it would embarrass her if you saw it. (kids! :))
2007-07-09 08:10:00 · answer #11 · answered by Mrs. Jent 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋