Ok so I've been with my wife for 7 years, 1 daughter 3 years old and things are rough at the moment. Relationship has not been easy, I work abraod alot and i'm not very often at the house.
Xmas 2006 my wife started talking to 'F' who became a really good ear for my wifes problems so much so that they had a Internet Affaire that led to her 'watching' him over the internet
Ok, i understood that my actions over the last years havent helped and we have tried to talk and communicate our way through the problems, apparently this affaire helped her and it made me realise what i can do to improve our situation. I understand why it happened, but when we talk about it she keeps explaining that nothing physical happened so its not as bad as it seems but she doesnt want to explain her feelings.
The problem is now she wants a "Trial Seperation" to think about how she really feels about me (and I think i know what that means!)
What do you guys think? Do i give her space?
2007-07-09 04:12:42 · 11 answers · asked by Explosive 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would tell her that the only way I'll agree to the trial separation is if the 2 of you pursue couple's therapy during that time. The time apart might actually be healthy.
2007-07-09 04:42:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not one of the guys, but I think you need to be prepared that your marriage is in bad territory. You admit that you have done bad things, and she had an affair---dont believe so easily that nothing "physical" happened--I think something did happen since she now wants a trial separation. Trial separation----that means get the divorce papers ready.
I would certainly advise you to try to work it out if you think that a third person is not a threat to your marriage. At least try and see if she wants to try, trust and faithfulness must be a major part of your marriage foundation.
2007-07-09 11:23:39 · answer #2 · answered by skyward 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure you really have much of a choice in the matter. If you say no, she will probably decide right then and there how she feels and you probably won't like the answer. At this point, she is going to decide what she is going to decide. What you need to decide is whether you can get past it and try to work on things. The only thing you can change or affect is your own thoughts and actions. She will make her own decisions and unfortunately you have to accept whatever they may be.
2007-07-09 11:19:10 · answer #3 · answered by hotchic 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Me" has nailed part of the problem, her lonliness, but I would call it "aloneness". Not quite the same thing.
Ask your wife if she would agree to marriage counseling for awhile before this trial separation, as that you can't guarantee that you would take her back if she has an affair while this separation is going on.
That will wake her up to that she may lose you forever, and that you wont' necessarily take her back if her "space" leads her back to you.
2007-07-09 11:46:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's lonely. Staying with a 3 year old while you are away is hard. Try marriage counseling before separation.
2007-07-09 11:26:36 · answer #5 · answered by Me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
iam not a guy but maybe you two need to sit down together & talk & remember what made you fall in love with each other. & rekindal the moment.
2007-07-09 11:42:06 · answer #6 · answered by susan s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, you are a fool! Do you really think she hasn't already had sex with "F"? You should have booted her out a while ago. Do yourself a favor and file for divorce and move on!
2007-07-09 11:18:32 · answer #7 · answered by Just_the_facts 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similiar boat. If you want a plan on how to get her back and have her appreciate you more email me.
2007-07-09 12:06:23 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she wants to go with the guy....and if it dont work come back to u.....(let her go dont take her back)
2007-07-09 11:18:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
"space"
TRANSLATION:
I want to be able to fuk around and I don't want you around to hassle me.
2007-07-09 11:16:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋