My husband sometimes has random women hit on him. It usually does not bother me, but sometimes when these women are throwing themselves at him, I tend to get upset. He brushes it off and says it's not a big deal, there's nothing to worry about. But recently there has been a female that he worked with for a few weeks that keeps texting and calling him. He says she's just a friend but as a woman I can tell she wants more. How would you handle this situation? I trust my husband but still there is always that "what if" in the back of my mind.
2007-07-09 03:44:31 · 29 answers · asked by Amanda 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thanks everyone for your answers! I do trust my husband and I don't believe anything has happened or will happen between them. This woman lives across the country and they will probably never work together again. Which is why I am so confused as to her calling/texting every other day. She even has him on her top friends list on Myspace! They worked together for 14 days, it's not like they've known each other for years or even months. I have pointed all these things out to my husband and he says he understands where I am coming from but thinks I am overreacting or that I don't want him to have any female friends. I told him I didn't want him to have any female friends like her :)
2007-07-09 03:58:58 · update #1
I love it when they say it's no big deal. They need to realize that it is a big deal when it obviously bothers you this much and I can't blame you. Tell him if its' no big deal then it wouldn't be too much trouble for him to block her number so her messages won't get through or block her from emailing him. Or no big deal for him to just tell her to stop contacting him altogether. No big deal, right? If he chooses not to, to spare her feelings rather than take yours into consideration, then it would be a big deal.
2007-07-09 04:09:32 · answer #1 · answered by foodieNY 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you should express these feelings to him and tell him to let her know that it's inappropriate unless it's work related. He is probably being honest in that it's nothing..but some men don't realize when a woman is crossing the line.
I know we women have to trust our men but certain women pass the line of respect and need to be reminded. It's one thing for him to have a female friend or co worker who is repectful but it's another to have a female constantly calling and texting...some women have no respect! Good Luck.
2007-07-09 10:55:02 · answer #2 · answered by ~ ♥ ~ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well you should first go for the female doing this to him because she is the one in wrong if she knows he is married.Talk to her and be a little less harsh with telling her to back off.Then maybe talk to him and tell him you told her to back off.If she keeps coming at him then tell him if he wants the marriage to work he better think hard of the phone calls from the other female if he loves you he will lose contact of her.give him the speech girl.
2007-07-09 10:50:38 · answer #3 · answered by Hotmom1216 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain!! There is nothing you can do really, he has chosen to marry you, you are the one he is with, and he loves you. I have been dealing with the same problem for 2 years, except I'm not married to him, which makes it harder. You (and I) need to stop living in the what if's!! Maybe if you tease him about it a little, in subtle ways, instead of coming right out and saying "Why is she doing that, do you want her?" Then maybe he will be more comfortable explaining the situation to you.
2007-07-09 10:58:26 · answer #4 · answered by blondie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him know how you feel and don't let him tell you "it's nothing." It has you worried for a reason so you need to voice that. I have had to do the same with my man and he didn't understand for like ever and then I finally told him he needed to end the friend ship or that I would have to leave. He ended it but is not nice about it. I don't regret telling him how I felt. It doesn't pay to be unhappy or worried all the time. Tell him.
2007-07-09 10:49:19 · answer #5 · answered by mrs_me19 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you don't have to worry about the women. You have to see how your husband handles the situation. If he brushes them off, then you shouldn't have anything to worry about. If his ego gets bigger and bigger because of the attention, then you might get worried. You are the one that caught him, so give yourself a big pat on the back and know that YOU are the woman he wanted because he asked you to marry him. Just think of all the other girls he could have picked!! But he picked you. And lucky him, you picked HIM.
2007-07-09 10:52:40 · answer #6 · answered by The pink panther 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL sounds like my husband!
does he not see that she wants more?? they never do or if they do, they don't admit it.
i would talk to him about it. tell him that you know that HE would never do anything but she wants more. if he is aware of the situation, chances are that he will eventually see her for what she is.
females can be really bothersome sometimes. they always want what they cant have. let him know that you TRUST him but that sometimes girls have a tendency to go a little over board.
why would females not flirt with him, you think he is a great catch chances are others see that to. let him know how much you love him.
2007-07-09 10:50:59 · answer #7 · answered by missingoz 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you are married to a gorgeous guy you must never ever show you are upset. you can say something when you get wind of some girl trying to create a relationship with him like, " how is our girlfriend today?" ' what is the latest from our sad little honey?" if you act like you are amused at the ridiculous notion that some girl could ever ! take your guy you will project strength. it takes special skills to have a gorgeous guy. a lot of other girls think you are so lucky, that you have what they would love to have. so, yes, they brazenly try to take it. i am constantly amazed to the tips of my toes that women are so disprespectful of each other, but it goes with the gorgeous guy territory. your job is to stay hot, and to always stay one step ahead of these women. act like these girls are hitting on the both of you. " oh, how could someone like THAT ever think she could get to us!" the trick is to act like you are.... NOT a little jealous, but to act like you are a little sympathetic to their hopeless cause. then, you and your husband have a secret together about another, sad woman. the horror is if your husband has a secret with another woman and you ! are the one out of the loop. being upset will do that. the fact that you see these texts is good proof that you are the one in the loop. if you were not, he would delete them. keep laughing, keep enjoying the gorgeous, it is fun to be married to a beautiful man.
2007-07-09 12:15:56 · answer #8 · answered by jaded 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think any women should really be texting/calling that much. How about you answer his phone when she calls. Go in to his work unexpectedly looking sexy as hell, get your hair done, something super sexy, take him to lunch, and do your thing..have sex with him during his break, if you don't have money for a room, just do him in the car..that will get his mind off of her. At least the coworker will see he has a sexy wife and she is no competition, she will see he is yours!
2007-07-09 10:51:53 · answer #9 · answered by Nickname123 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him know it is bothering you, also advise him you are a woman and you know how the think even though he may not think its a big deal. But that other woman has other intention. Also advise its disrespectful for another woman calling and texting him, if he cares about the marriage and your feelings he will stop.
2007-07-09 10:49:23 · answer #10 · answered by Brezzy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋