How do you deal with a husband who surfs **** on a regular basis ?

Question

I have a friend whose husband is surfing the net constantly for **** -she discovered it by mistake when he was out...
She says that she feels used when they make love or even when they are together. They have a small baby - and she says that she is driven to such an extent that she is contemplating divorce...How do I explain things to her?
Is it something to be so concerned about ? Does the husband's act, amount to cheating ? If she does not bother about it - is there a chance that it can lead to something worse ?

Answer 1

Firstly this amounts to no ground for divorce as surfing p o r n network neither amounts to cheating or adultery nor creulty, the valid grounds for divorce. Rather not indulging in sexual activity by any spouse for a long period of time without any reason thus denying the regular conjugal relationship has been considered as a committing of mental cruelty towards the other spouse & it can be considered as cruelty for granting divorce to the deprived spouse. Why this friend of your feels used when making love or even when they are together only shows her inferiority complex of some type nothing else, if she is physically fit which it seems as they have a child then making love is the best a married couple should be doing & be proud of it rather feeling guilty or used, After all this is a natural phenomenon any human being indulge in as any other human activity there is nothing bad or awkward about it & being married one should be indulging it in regularly with each other for a healthy life which has been medically certified by the expert medical practitioners. No court will entertain her plea for divorce on this ground & she will fail in her case & even loose good relationship with her husband in bargain.

Answer 2

I'm not sure what the **** in your question stands for, but let me tell you that more or less 9 out of 10 people are known to have taken a peek at some adult entertainment or the other on the net. Maybe not all of them are not habitual pleasure seekers. But it is difficult to resist the temptation when you have the things just a click away. So your friend's husband isn't the only tainted net surfer on earth.
Being addicted to sleaze is surely some kind of a mental debilitation, but it doesn't mean cheating by any account. Your friend must be mature enough to realise that. In feeling being used I guess she is over reacting. Rather than going into the root of the problem, she is exhibiting a knee jerk reaction. She must talk to him patiently and discover what makes him interested in such perverted deviations. She can take him to a psychologist, if necessary. Just remember that often it is the lack of sufficient warmth or sexual unfulfillment from one's spouse that drives a person to such deviant behaviour.

Answer 3

Browsing pornsites is not a sin. He is only hyper-curious and his wife is unable to quench his curiosities. Instead of doubting him, she can have a open talk with him, keeping aside all her shy and all such emotions. Days have changed from those days when a contemporary wife had no talks with her husband about sex. Now the days are such that there is a demand for her to talk about the most important phase of life i.e sex, with her beloved life partner.

He browsing pornsites is not a legally valid reason to divorce either. She should only go thru some good magazines to know how to improve her love life better, after a child has entered the family. I would say that she is cheating him in some way by not talking to him, or by not taking good care of his sexual urges which is quite natural among all men. Its high time for her to wake up and be a good wife.

Answer 4

Whats the harm in surfing ****. Its much much better than ****** another female. Its just having fun like watching a movie. As long as it does not affect your relationship with the husband it should not be a matter of great concern. In now a days world we should be a little brodminded to a certain extent. If you take things tangently you are the sufferer.
By watching **** movies or surfinf **** sites does not amount to cheating.
Tell your friend not to take these things very seriously and be a little broadminded.
Frankly speaking all males watch porno. i dont know why but they do, but because of this not all males are unfaithful.

Answer 5

I simply fail to understand why your friend is trying to restrict her husband's behaviour when it does not affect her in any way. Instead of doing it from home, will your friend he happier if he sought sex from strreetwalkers?
People have different hobbies. Just respect that so long it causes no harm to others. Seeing what you say **** is a benign habit. You or your friend need not worry about it. Rather, ask your friend to emulate the actions of the Net and perform those for her husband. This way, she may win back her husband.

Answer 6

This matter runs deeper than it seems. Insufficient data is not good for making judgments. The writing of the above seems to make the man the culprit. is the woman performing up to par. I can understand a third party in a love triangle but surfing ___. She maybe feeling insecure. Whatever it is, she should open up her feelings to her man. Nothing is better than open communication. If she can make herself 40% understood, she should consider herself blessed.

Answer 7

is she mormon or what? What else would he use the internet for???

The entire internet really caught on because men want to look at naked women doing naughty things. In the mid 90s, 70% of all internet sites were **** sites. Hello? I don't think that these billions and billions of pictures are being looked at by the 350 most sexually deviant men in the world...

It's normal, he is a guy. We all do it at one time or another. I would be more worried if her weren't looking at ****. If she is so repressed about him looking at **** on the web, then she probably isn't great in the sack either, and it won't be long before he is doing more then looking.

Tell her to wake up and smell the coffee. It's 2007 not 1897. Get a book. Buy a toy. Buy some furry handcuffs. Get one of the 9.99 movies next time you are at a hotel... If she is so sheltered, and he is looking at hardcore stuff, then that is the real problem.

Answer 8

Be a friend, not a councillor or judge. I've seen men do worse than just ogle at ***. Would she rather he go out and have some ***? You have no right to explain anything. Just be a friend. She will have to deal with these personal matters the best way she can. You dont want to be the bad guy should they work it out.

Answer 9

Lets get it in prospective he is sitting in a room all alone and looking at pornographic images . He isn't contacting anyone in chat rooms ,he isn't calling sex lines , he isn't going out with strange women or for that matter looking at real women.

**** on the internet is like a subscription to play boy was15 years ago every man had one but no one told the little lady
Its not about the **** really its about her lack of trust in him , She cant trust him to just look at these web sites with out thinking he is going to act on them, when I think this is his primer to better sex , or perhaps an escape from an ordinary sex life a FANTASY.

Answer 10

I think it´s nothing to do with cheating.
As long as he watches "normal" **** sites it isn´t a a crime at all.
It´s something many men do and it doesn´t mean that they do not feel attracted by their wives. It´s typical for guys.
If he doesn´t watch children porns or gay **** I would just keep my mouth shut.
... well, as long as he doesn´t spend lots of money on watching these sites... tell your friend that she shouldn´t panic for nothing...