I need help and my husband is being a jerk about my needing help.?

Question

In the past I've been diagnosed with OCD, depression, and anxiety. Lately its been getting worse. Having my type of OCD is terrible. I cry all the time and i don't know why, i imagine horrible events and obsess about them all day, and i have no control over it. Every day i wake up with the thought that my husband might not come home from work; that he might die or something. These uncontrollable thoughts scare me to death and i've had them for years. I told my husband i think i needed help andhe's not being very sympathetic. I don't know what to do. He said "Everybody is a little OCD You just want to believe you're OCD." and then "What do you want me to say? I'm sorry?" I just wish he'd be a little more understanding. he is being mean and i dont' konw what to do I need his support more than ever and he's not giving it to me What do i tell him?

PS I took this quiz Are you in a domestic violence situation" and I got 15 out of 18 questions so apparently i am verballyabused do u agree?

Answer 1

Honey, if you are having all these problems and at least some of them are biologically based then you should be under the care of a psychiatrist, possibly taking meds and seeing a therapist on a REGULAR basis.

You haven't said that you are getting any help...why not? Why haven't YOU picked up the phone and gotten yourself evaluated and treated????? You are adult enough to know you have a problem, then you're adult enough to go out and find your own help.

All the things you mentioned can be managed better and sometimes even eliminated by use of therapy and meds and yet you seem to want someone else to see that you get help. You may have problems but you're an adult. Call your local mental health agency and get in to see someone ASAP.

As for your husband, I don't know. Maybe he doesn't have the first clue how to help you. Maybe he's wondering (as I do) why YOU haven't seemed to want to take the initiative and do something to get help for yourself and he's tired and frustrated.

Sorry, but it sounds to me like you are whining and that you LIKE being sick and you enjoy people feeling sorry for you.

Once you get thoroughly screened, get yourself some help and get as straightened out as you can, THEN deal with the marriage. I sincerely doubt your husband would have anything nice to say about you being a good wife at this point either.

Good luck.

Answer 2

First of all, what type of help do you need from him? Emotional, financial, or physical? I would be very clear about this with him. If it's emotional, you might have to tell him exactly what you need from him. More hugs? Assurance that nothing will happen to him? Because if OCD is the problem, then there's no amount of assurance that he'll be okay will help you to not feel like he's going to die.

You might need financial help in order to get some therapy and meds. He may be more willing to give this type of help.

And as far as physical help, do you need his assistance with the household chores? Be very upfront with what that means. Don't think that he should just look at the house and decide what to do, especially since he's working and would need to come home and work some more.

Most of all, just give the situation time. It could be that both of you are just overly frustrated right now and you'll need a lot of time and understanding on BOTH ends to get things back to normal.

Answer 3

Your husband probably doesn't want to think he has a wife who's crazy. So he minimizes the situation. Having OCD doesn't mean you're crazy, just to clarify. But your husband likely sees it this way.
Yes it would be better to have your husband's support for this but the reality is you don't have it. Don't wait for him to support you. You may be wating a long time. Take matters into your own hands and get help. If this upsets him, do it in secret. Nobody on this earth will ever take care of you the way you can and this is a time you need to take care of yourself. Your mental health is important, wether your husband sees it or not.

Answer 4

This man of yours may be very younger and he appears to be depressed considering that he used to be no longer relatively competent to be a dad and the accountability is of all of it has tired him of all his vigour. The variety of jobs he can get present him not anything however that salary packet on the finish of the week and no longer a lot of it's for him. He under no circumstances had that point whilst he would make a decision what to do along with his cash and seems like he is in a "trap 22" obstacle. So as you being the feminine are probably the most mature of the 2 of you most effective you'll be able to see the fine solution to rectify the obstacle. He demands to be persuaded to uncover in himself the vigour to tug up and out into a task he enjoys and to peer that he demands a motive to paintings and also you need to persuade him that his household are the fine motive any individual would have. He demands a task that offers him a motive to stand up of his *** and paintings difficult. it's elaborate to peer something directly whilst depressed and he's. Oh and he didn't imply that after he stated he didn't care if there used to be a divorce. That used to be a cry for support however he's 19 and he most effective is aware of to behave that method, perhaps you'll be able to type it out in combination and get him whatever he can do this he feels pleased with doing. And the ones night time shifts will pull him down extra so i advocate you get him to quit that night time shift lark as it's going to definitely be the top of you and him. he has to uncover a greater process and the quicker you get him off night time the greater.

Answer 5

the problem is that you are looking to him for a fix for you. There isn't much he could say or do that would be supportive---I know I have b een in the same situation. I couldnt get a decent diagnosis and I was jumping from doc to doc and trying to get rational input from my husband. The thing is our husbands cant be ALL things to us and we can't be ALL things to them. Get into a support group or with a counselor you trust (i like the samaritan counselors who are affiated with a religion). I found out I needed to work on me....and get happy...and stop expecting him to fix me, make me happy or change.....

If you tend to awfulize (make it worse than it is) start writing it down and get rigorously honest about your symptoms, rate them, keep a journal and talk with your doc. You may be too sensitive to your own symptoms....we all feel "off" a little part of the time whether its physical, emotionally or spiritually ......

Get help. Your husband m isses you.

Answer 6

You kinda sound like you need more help then your hubby can give you . YOU NEED TO CALL YOUR DOCTOR OR MENTAL HEALTH OFFICE IN THE COUNTY YOU LIVE IN IF YOU CAN"T AFFORD A DOCTOR THERE IS HELP AND THOSE TEST OUT THERE THE WAY YOUR FEELING YOUR GOING TO UNAWARE ANSWER THEN THAT WAY YOU NEED HELP I AM NOT SURE ABOUT OCD . YOU SOUND VERY DEPRESSED GET HELP FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY BEFORE SOME THING HAPPENS TO HURT YOU MORE THEN YOU ARE . GOOD LUCK P.S YOUR HUSBAND MAYBE OVER WHELMED WITH ALL THIS TO .

Answer 7

no, i do not agree. YOU need professional help NOW, you are in no position to make any conclusions about your husband, and he is in a state of denial. You may or may not be a hypochondriac ... and in any event, whatever is wrong need professional help...this is not a self help deal here. See your doctor and get a referral immediately. If you do not do this, it is obvious that you like feeling this way. Good luck

Answer 8

Go see a therapist you sound like you need some real help!

Answer 9

it appears that you are in need of MUCH help....much more than hubby can supply....please visit a doctor and acquire the help that hubby is unable to provide

Answer 10

I agree with Lady Phoenix.....GET HELP !

Only you can decide what is best for you.