i need advice my friend is pregnant and won't stop drinking?

Question

she is abou 2 1/2 months pregnant and she won't stop drinking. she says she drinks like every other day. she claims she is worried about the baby having problems but I just pictures of her drinking last night. she has two kids already but i a afraid that she will not be taking care of herself on purpose so she can miscarry. I have tried talking to her but since I don't drink I am not there with her to stop her from doing it. I need advice on what to do.

she is married and her husband knows she is pregnant. he drinks also. i have told her to stop and explained to her to go to the doctor now and even offered to take care of her kids while she goes but still wont listen.

Answer 1

You can read on this site
http://www.seekwellness.com/nutrition/fetal_alcohol_syndrome.htm

or even show her similar sites. She is setting herself and that child up for a heartbreaking life. If she doesn't miscarry that child she and the child will have a life with difficulty. Best tactic is a scare tactic of what can happen if she continues her ways.

Answer 2

I have read that there really isn't a safe amount of drinking that won't affect a baby in some way. It if doesn't cause fetal alcohol syndrome it might cause a lower birth weight and or lower IQ. She should make the choice she feels she should make even if you don't agree with it. Women who are pressured by friends and the father can have a really bad emotional aftermath if they go through an abortion compared to someone who wanted one and no one said much about it. The father should have some say too since it is his child as well but shouldn't insist on what he wants if she truly doesn't believe in it. If anything they could possibly make a compromise and go through an adoption. You could bring this up to her and look u and provide her with some information about it so she can make the choice she wants.

Answer 3

She needs help. Just you won't do it. You need to aske her if she is trying to miscarry on purpose. Tell her does she want to take care of a child that has serious health problems or mental issues the rest of her life because she is too selfish to think of someone other than herself? I feel for her other 2 children. IF she is this way with an unborn child I can only imagine what the other 2 go through everyday with her.

Answer 4

It is hard to make someone stop something they do not want to. No matter what you do she may continue her behavior. Perhaps you could find some papers and pictures on line about the effects of fetal alcohol syndrome. Many people do not know realize devastating it can be and how it will affect the child for the rest of their lives. Drinking while pregnant has longer and more devastating effects then doing cocaine while pregnant.
There isn't much more you can do. Due to our legal system, there isn't much social services or CPS can do until the baby is born.

Answer 5

Unfortunately, if she is an adult, there really isn't too much you can do. She does have that choice (not that I'm saying it's the right one, because it's grossly irresponsible to go drinking every other day when you're pregnant). All you can do is express your concerns to her, maybe not spend time with her anymore until she stops drinking, or urge her to see someone/talk to someone (a professional) for her baby's sake. Good luck, and I really hope you're able to get through to her. What a horrible thing to actually TRY to miscarry :-(

Answer 6

this saddens me. unfortunately drinking usually does not cause a miscarriage - instead it will cause the child to be born with fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS). if she won't listen to you to stop drinking, then maybe plan an intervention. get all of her close relatives and friends together in one room and each person confronts her about her drinking while pregnant. who knows? maybe she really thinks that the amount she is drinking won't hurt the child - she has to be informed and she has to know that people are worried about the baby's wellbeing. and please don't let anybody bash her, it will make it worse - what she needs right now is TONS of support!! good luck!

Answer 7

A person with two children and expecting the third one is supposed to be already a responsible one and should know what she is doing and realise herself the effects her actions will have on the unborn child in her womb! If you think she is misbehaving, then she is irresponsible and you ought to tell her so. If she doesn't listen and you still think she needs help, refer the case to a local social work or family organisation. They will know how to handle the situation.

Answer 8

Oh my god..I don't know of anyone who would want to miscarry....geez. Its such a blessing to have a baby , couples are so shattered when they have to deal with a miscarriage and deliberately trying to kill the baby is just bad karma...What goes around comes around my dear..you need to explain this to her!! If she has a little bit conscience left in her,she will stop!

Answer 9

Unfortunately there's nothing you really can do. She's going to do whatever she wants. The best thing you can do is be there for her, but don't support her habit. If possible, please explain to her that drinking doesn't necessarily cause a miscarriage. If anything, she's running the risk of having a child with serious medical issues. She doesn't want the child now, does she really want if it has medical problems???

Answer 10

keep hounding her. where is the father of the baby, her mother? show her some pictures of babies/children with fetal alcohol syndrome, get on google and look for some. strange thing is, most people dont realize just how many children with FAS end up in special education. it may not look like it at birth, then again it may, but it will eventually rear its head and have to be dealt with. its a very sad, very PREVENTABLE outcome.

http://www.specialchild.com/archives/dz-011.html