2007-07-07 20:13:03 · 13 answers · asked by marine_playboy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think inside yourself you know the answer to this question....but
perhaps are hoping someone will supply you with enough
encouragement to either begin to date outside of your marriage
or continue.
First of all, suppose your wife feels lonely....how would you feel if she chose to "date" outside of your marriage? How okay would that be with you?
Secondly you have made a commitment to the woman you are married to. A man generally keeps his word, his vows....his commitments.....even when it becomes difficult or emotions begin to bring some temptation his way.
And again, remember, just as you feel this way, your wife
could feel this way as well. What would you expect of her?
A very dear friend once told me a story. An older, married
man had asked to take her out for dinner and some "talk"
as he was not completely satisfied with his marriage and
felt my friend was lonely (she was also married).
She told him simply and quietly...."You know, I can take
the energy I have and use it to be a cheat and go spend
time with you.....or I can use that same energy to try to
work on making my marriage better---making my husband
and myself closer and find things we can enjoy together
to build my marriage up."
Guess which she chose?
Yes. You are right. She is my friend for a reason---she
is wise, loyal, kind, and keeps her commitments in life.
Loneliness didn't lower her standards. Mine either.
You will get no encouragement from me to cause hurt and
pain to others in this world....there is enough of that. If you are lonely, go to your wife and work it out with her. She
may have something to tell you, too, about things she finds
lacking in the marriage.....
But love can and does work miracles, if we choose to
love, rather than cheat.
Those you would date or have dated have feelings, too, you
know. How lonely would they be when you aren't with them?
How lonely will your wife be while you are out dating other
women?
Time for selfishness and self absorption goes out when
the marriage bells chime, my friend. It takes more of a man
to keep his promise, to fully love his chosen wife for the rest of his life than it does to act like an out of control, hormonal teenage boy who lacks maturity and self control in relationships--in the self serving desire to meet only his own perceived needs.
If you really are a Marine, please use some of your military discipline to develop some emotional discipline. Really lonely? Spend more time with your chosen mate.....
I wish all the best to both you and your wife.
Doris
WithWingsofAngels@comcast.net
2007-07-07 20:46:33 · answer #1 · answered by Doris L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO.. when you got married you made a committment to your wife and she to you.. if you feel lonely tell her, if you can't work out whatever the problem may be.. then leave before you bring another person into your relationship and hurt 3 people instead of two
2007-07-08 04:52:43 · answer #2 · answered by Confused 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Each couple are a world of their own, I have been blessed to be married with the same woman for the past 37 yrs. i love her more than any other person in the world, But I only promised her 90% when we married. I have delivered that 90% promise and she has forgiven me the other 10% of human fault and weakness. it has worked for us, because from the beginning we did not promise the impossible.
2007-07-08 03:31:08 · answer #3 · answered by Bob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no. Divorce is okay. Dating outside a marriage is cheating.
2007-07-08 03:40:41 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still feel lonley then maybe you dont need to be with that person anymore.Dont cheat on them just tell them things dont feel the same anymore,and leave them.When you cheat that only makes things worse.
2007-07-08 03:33:59 · answer #5 · answered by neesha 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cheating is cheating no matter how you look at it or word it ... find a hobby go out with buddies ... if you are that lonely or unhappy get out of the marriage
2007-07-08 03:16:15 · answer #6 · answered by rdnckwmn64 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No. If you are that lonely, then get a divorce and THEN date.
2007-07-08 03:17:40 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if the other person knows about it and is OK with it. If not, NO. Go to counseling.
2007-07-08 03:16:17 · answer #8 · answered by Jeannie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no its not ok if your not happy with your spouse then you need to file for a divorce and move on with your life
2007-07-08 03:17:10 · answer #9 · answered by mmedina96 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's never okay. when you marry someone. you commit to that person, foregoing selfishness like "I feel lonely". If you feel lonely, talk to your wife about it.
2007-07-08 03:16:27 · answer #10 · answered by Jefe' 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋