For a while now I've had feelings for a girl who has pretty much been my best friend since high school. We met the first week of our Freshman year in high school and now go to the same college.
I've asked what to do about it on here but I got responses that don't work for me: tell her how I feel or find a different girl.
I know it COULD be for the best, but the chance of messing up the friendship makes "could" just not be worth it to me (also, I in no way fit the pfrofile of the guys she dates). I also don't feel that the feelings are reciprocated because she is almost always in a relationship with another guy. I, on the other hand, am all but unable to talk to other girls because I can't get past this friend of mine.
ASIDE FROM TELLING HER HOW I FEEL, what can I do to try to move on and find someone else?
2007-07-07 19:11:30 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I feel the need to respond to the "CHICKEN" answer. It's not that I'm scared of the rejection, that's just something that you have to get used to as a guy. As much as I'd like to think it, not every girl is interested in me.
However, what I am scared of is what else can come with the rejection in this case. With 99.9% of girls, if I make a move and they respond negatively it's really no big loss to me, I just move to the next one. But the same situation with her could result in a loss of a really good friendship, and it's just not worth it to me.
2007-07-07 19:22:26 · update #1
I had the same problem, but with a guy of course, I never thought i would get over him because we were always together as friends. i watched him date girl after girl and it was hard. I dont know how well this will work for you but what i did was try to spend time away from him for awhile, hanging out with other friends meeting new people kept my mind of of him. Eventually i met someone new and he was just something in the past. were still friends till this day, and now he likes me. So i really dont know if this was help full to you or not but i tried.
2007-07-07 19:17:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I definitely wouldn't tell her how you feel because it will seriously damage the friendship and probably lead to a series of awkwardness. I confessed once to my friend who I formally was close and things didn't go so swell after that as in how close we are today as friends. The best thing is to stay as friends and keep it that way. If you do tell her, brace yourself for a world of hurt and pain.
By the way, give it some time and you will get over it. I know from my experience feelings are the hardest things to control.
I know this is easier said than done but you need to break the emotional attachment you have going on. Try finding another girl who is more interesting like an opposite personality from you and go out to meet new folks.
Good Luck. I hope this helps.
2007-07-07 19:33:08 · answer #2 · answered by Steven 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess u could make new 'female friends' and get to know them...see if maybe there is a way that u might like them. it does't really sound like a good plan. if u didnt say the 'aside from telling her how i feel' thing i would've told u to tell her how u feel...but ur right. it's not worth destroying a friendship. hate to break it to u though, that's the only way you'll get past her. if u like her and u dnt let her know how u feel, then nothing will ever happen between u two. and it seems to me that its probably gonna be hard for u to move on to somebody else...even if u do ask for advice on yahoo. so just see what everybody else says, and think bout it...do wut feels right. oh and if u do tell her how u feel and she doesnt feel the same way or u get a weird response, make sure u let her know that u still want to be friends and that it won't change anything in ur friendship.
2007-07-07 19:37:12 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can deside what is right for you. Seems she is not too interested in you but try this. Get her alone and have a few drinks then casually sugest sex. If she laughs it off, laugh with her and bury any idea of a relationship with her. If she gives in, go slow afterwards she where it leads but dont force it. Women like slow, slow, slow! More that one marriage has been born from this type of beginning.
2007-07-07 19:19:29 · answer #4 · answered by disposabledude 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to her and tell her you met this girl and you really like her but your unsure of this girls feelings towards you and you don't know what to do about it. Don't let on that you are talking about her and maybe she will give you some good ideas on how to deal with it.Maybe she will catch onto what you are saying to her and if she does know you are talking about her she will ask if you are talking about her but if she says nothing then you have nothing to worry about because she will still go on like before as your friend. You have nothing to lose by doing this and everything to gain.
2007-07-07 19:26:12 · answer #5 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you can always go to social events to meet new ppl and maybe move on. and i think it's cute and if you have that much feeling about them you should tell her or ask her out or something cuzz usually or sometimes the girl is waiting for the guy to make the moves.
2007-07-07 19:16:00 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. Cats 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that does not leave much. I guess you can be her best friend and watch her get with other men lol. NAw but really I guess thats all you can do. Get out and see if you can find anyone else
2007-07-07 19:16:15 · answer #7 · answered by ca803 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try not talking to her, or try not to be in the same place she goes. Also, try talking to someone else that you may think is attractive, like in one of your classes. Also, try not thinking about her.
2007-07-07 19:17:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
CHICKEN>>>>>>>> you need to take her to the lake and tell her ... NO GUTS!!!!
2007-07-07 19:16:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋