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we havn't had sex this year. in dec. he said he didn't find me attractive. should i just wait and let him go or should i try harder

2007-07-07 13:27:01 · 21 answers · asked by rayhab 4 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

21 answers

He said that??? Jeez, that's mean. I'd be more worried about what he said than the porn. Porn is just porn. Him saying he doesn't find you attractive sounds like he's thinking of ending the marriage. When my husband did the same thing, he was scouting the net for other women. We had a serious sit-down about what he wanted in this marriage and what I wanted and took action to fix it. Yikes. I don't know what all is going on in your marriage, but it sounds like sex is a symptom of a major problem. I hope you sit him down and get it straight.

2007-07-07 13:55:59 · answer #1 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 0 0

First, it like July! What the heck is wrong with him? If he doesn't find you attractive then why are you still there? What does he mean by that? That porn is attractive? Please all guys like the porn ; but not wanting to be with their wife at all says his getting it from somewhere if not you. Why don't you ask him what he thinks would make you attractive to him again. Because you had to have been at some point in his life. If you feel you can save this marriage from destruction then do this. Look at yourself in the mirror. What do YOU see? Do you need to lose weight, have your hair done, dress nicer. Is there anything that you really feel you can improve on yourself? If so then start doing it. Buy some nice things that you think he would like to see you in and put on some makeup and have your hair done, weather it's a cut or a new do. If his worth keeping then do what you need to to make yourself attractive to him again. Otherwise let him go.

2007-07-07 13:44:52 · answer #2 · answered by Countrygirl 5 · 0 1

Try harder at what? If you haven't had sex in a year and there is no physical medical issue and he's dealing with porn, what are you waiting for? If you can't discuss this issue with him or you have tried and he has no answers, you don't have a relationship. He's living in some fantasy world and you aren't part of it. The important issue on top of this is he says he's no longer attracted to you. Get yourself away from him. He can't give you what you are looking for unfortunately.

2007-07-07 13:49:25 · answer #3 · answered by dawnb 7 · 1 0

My opinion is you should get better aquanted with him! Have some time together. Have sex with him because in marrige there is a couple of things to do to keep it healthey. Like you should have sex at least once a week. Also go out and make sure you know him like you did. Were you know him so well you know what he will say before he says it. And make him wait when he is in the mood tell him you're not try this it will work!!!

Sincerly, Concerd Person

2007-07-07 13:40:26 · answer #4 · answered by Michael Isbell 1 · 0 0

Why try harder for a jerk? My gosh girl, gain your self respect. He's a looser if he treats you that way. You deserve so much better.

There is no reason your husband should ever say these things to you and then view porn...what is he trying to rub salt in the wound?

You can find someone better , some one who actually deserves to be with the wonderful person you are.

2007-07-07 13:55:42 · answer #5 · answered by I'm Here 4 · 1 1

If you haven't had sex this year, you have bigger problems than porn. Time to have a sit down and talk. I could not live with someone who didn't find me attractive, but that is me, not you. Is your husband that attractive? Perhaps you need to have a take a full length mirror with you to have this talk. Perhaps he should stand in front if it and critique himself for a change. Good luck and peace.

2007-07-07 13:54:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

How mean. I know this must **** you off and hurt your feelings. What a *****. If it were me, I'd **** him off right back. Do something different with your looks. Get your hair and nails done. Put a little perfume on and wear sexier but tasteful clothing. Then, when he notices, don't give in. Keep him at a distance. As far as the porn, just act like you don't care. When he does give in, keep him wanting you by not paying too much attention to him but more to yourself.

2007-07-07 13:52:41 · answer #7 · answered by Honeybee 5 · 1 0

Your husband has checked out of your marriage reality entirely.
You KNOW this is wrong! You don't need us to tell you! You already know that he is having serious maturity issues, for starters.
Verbally slap him around with a wake-up call. He is seriously immature.

2007-07-07 15:44:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

it truly is not that his actual self is emotionally interested in those , as you place raunchy sexual stuff. that's that his techniques is being mainuklated via the for sure contrasting techniques provided to him which go away an undeniably great good effect on his techniques. he's being mentally tricked, because of the fact the techniques are no longer immediately spoken of in the sexual reflects. that would supply the phantasm away and rendering it much less effective. yet via appealing in this form of intercourse it is all pleasurefull, meaning all it is centred on is the exhilaration of the persons in contact irregardless of their prestige or personalities in existence, the guy is powerfulfully impacted, because of the fact society is so very centred on those statuses. which incorporate prestige of ladies human beings and their place in existence and that they are to be respected and dealt with rightand etc etc. and so whilst the clean opposite of the untouchable woman is dropped on the techniques of the guy considering that's this form of dramatic contrasts to what he has been experiencig for daily of his existence, that the effect is powerfully good and heis techniques cant get adequate of the interactions. he needs to appreciate what ios particularly occurring. the tricks used is multuilayered and interwoven. it is th point of contrasts provided to him are diverse with the point to eeo his techniques busy somewhat than for huim to parent it out. because of the fact as quickly as he truly figures it out the illusions created for him will no longer carry any means. i am going with to advise you get the e book stated in the souces section beklow my answer. yoyu study it and function him study it. take a seat and communicate numerous techniques that are provided in it.

2016-10-20 05:39:50 · answer #9 · answered by clam 4 · 0 0

First are you a christian? If so do not worry about having sex with him. Just pray for him!!! Second If he is watching porn and not having sex with you why is he arousing himself? If he is watching porn and not having sex with you who is he having sex with? Self Esteem!!!!Self Esteem!!!! Love your self be happy with who you are and leave him alone!!!!!

2007-07-07 13:53:43 · answer #10 · answered by teldis629 1 · 0 0

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