Am I going to regret cutting ties with my wife and son when we divorce?

Question

I have caused nothing but dissapointment and heartache. I don't deserve them.

Answer 1

Cutting ties with your son is not the way to go. You need to look at how to change your behaviour to stop causing heartache and disappointment to yourself and those around you.
Find a counsellor and work on these behaviour changes with them so you don't have massive regrets in the future of not being there for your son. We are the masters of ourself and we have the capacity to change if we want to.
Your son is going to need a father who will step up to the plate to help him through life's challenges.
At this point you are feeling sorry for yourself because whatever it was you did has caused your family, marriage breakdown. Time to move outside of the 'square' you have yourself in and develop yourself to your full potential for yourself and your son's future relationship. By doing this you may develop a friendship with your estranged wife that will assist your son to learn that lifes obstacles can be overcome.
Change is hard the end result is worth it long term.
Best wishes for your future and your son's.

Answer 2

I feel like you are just asking this question because u want sympathy really---if you are a disappointment to your wife and child--then let someone else make them happy, I'm sure that they deserve someone that can make them happy and love them and if you feel the same don't look for other people to tell you that you are right or wrong---most kids don't want to be without their dads--but if you only make them sad then go on and let them alone! Any man should regret being a heartache and disappointment--you should have changed your ways when you knew you were doing wrong so i don't have much sympathy for you--and if anyone else gives you some--feel lucky --you should be trying to change and get your family back instead of looking for people to justify what the hell you are doing instead--hope this helps you out and good luck!!

Answer 3

Being divorced doesn't mean you can't compromise for the sake of your son. If you love your son, nothing will get in the way of your relationship. If you feel you haven't been good to him, then just try from here on out. Love is strong, don't let go of your boy. That is your blood, he will carry on your name. How you teach him now will determine what kind of man he will become. Don't start a trend as the abandoner, you could be starting something for generations to come. Life is about change and improving. NO ONE IS PERFECT, if you want something, do it. It's never too late!!!!

Answer 4

Wait a minute, back up and think this thing out. It sounds like your wife will be the one regretting it. You are a dissapointment to her because she has put the guilt on you.
It is up to her and you together to decide if the marriage is worth the time and effort. Any marriage cannot be destroyed if you "both" want it to work. You will not feel any regret if you are the one who "DOES" want to make it work. It will be her loss if she is the one who is to lazy to take the time and effort to put things back together. With that said, you can leave her feeling easy and comfortable with your heart knowing that you were the one who did'nt want to leave. Remember this: It will be HER loss not yours. I know you have done the best you can in the past. The heart does not give
up so easy when it feels gulity for something it knows that it was not at fault, in the first place. I hope I have eased your pain somewhat. Keep your head held high.
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Answer 5

If you don't fix what is inheirently wrong with you, you are just going to transfer those things to the next relationship. I'm not saying to try and work it out if you are hurting them, but you need some work on yourself for everyone's benefit. You will have to be a part of their lives for 18 years at the least. Make all of those interactions cordial, and just be a good PERSON. But it sounds like you have some serious issues, and if the mere thought of losing your wife and son hasn't changed your tune, then god knows what will.

Answer 6

If that's how you feel...then you can't change that, but I do know one thing for sure. There is nothing that you can do that will make your son turn on you. Dissapointed I don't think so. Just be there for him not the wife...but him. Besides if he makes something of himself you're going to regret that. TRUST ME!

Answer 7

If you are a bad person and are not willing to work at changing things you know are hurtful, then perhaps it's best you steer clear from their path. If you have serious problems and / or have addictions that are destructive, then be a man and cut contact.( I would prefer no father figure over a bad role model for my child if I had to choose.)

But if you think you can change and improve yourself, then it would be good for your son to have you influence him.

Only you know what the real deal is here....So be honest with yourself and think things over. Nobody is perfect, and being a good, responsible parent is not easy. Sort out your issues and see what it is that you can do for him. Good luck.

Answer 8

Wow wait a minute. Let me tell you a little secret we all make mistakes and we are not perfect. Yes you may have disappointed someone but cutting ties with your son because you feel guilty is crazy. He doesnt care what you have done you are his dad and he loves you just the same. Flaws and all.

Answer 9

Its understandable to want to cut ties with your wife, but not your child. The children are innocent in a divorce and you will see if you cut your child out. It will hurt you and the child weather you think so right now or not.

Answer 10

Do not cut ties with your son, he's your boy and it will scar him for life. It doesn't matter if you think you don't deserve him, he does not deserve to be abandoned.

It doesn't matter what you do with your wife but don't hurt your son, no matter what you are his father and you will be for the rest of his life. Do good by him, love him and always, no matter what stand by him.

You are just depressed, get some counseling, some help of any kind. Please, please don't cut your son out of your life.