my ex insisted on joint custody. He has them 15 days each month but he is NEVER there. His girlfriend is the only person the kids spend time with. Should I have to deal with the "girlfriend"? I share visitation with their father, not her. Honestly she does it all and says I can do nothing about it. If they can't be with their dad then why should they not stay with me, their mom? Would I have a chance in taking him back to court to modify the visitation or even custody since he isn't interested in seeing them. It's always been a power struggle to say he has joint custody and I didn't "win". It has nothing to do with the children's best interest; only his ego!
2007-07-07 12:43:58 · 8 answers · asked by paisley 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't know the ages of your children, but it seems pretty stupid and disruptive for them to be gone half the month to be with someone who isn't even related. Does your state have child advocates who can look at the situation and help get the visitation modified? I think it is stupid to grow up that way. If it such a big deal to him, have him move closer. I get the "win" thing. Sounds like he's a real charmer. I personally wouldn't do it. I would not "deal" with the ex. I would get a notebook and if he isn't there, then don't send the kids and document the date and time and that he wasn't available for his scheduled visitation. Contact a family law attorney or three and get their viewpoints. Good luck. Sorry he's such a moron. Hope your kids are doing well.
2007-07-07 12:49:58 · answer #1 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is wrong. Call your lawyer and take him back to court. He has joint custody, not the girlfriend. And I know a lot of people who are divorced with kids and their custody agreement specifically states "no overnights" unless they are married. Look into that, because it can be destructive to the children, what happens if they break up? Now they've lost someone that they spend half their lives with. Definitely file a motion for a hearing on this matter.
2007-07-07 13:50:01 · answer #2 · answered by mcmommy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the children should be with you if their father isn't going to be there for them. You need to get that modified. Basically another person, that does not have the kids best interest, is helping you raise them. Not their father.
2007-07-07 12:49:09 · answer #3 · answered by Tyra99 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he got a fair judgment from the court. if he chooses to never be there it may not seem right but the kids are going to see just as much of him as he wants no matter what you do. The kids are not stupid, they will figure it out. You can try to get the court to take a look at what he is doing but they are unlikely to do anything
2007-07-07 12:56:06 · answer #4 · answered by fissionrod 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your decree should say you release them to their father for visitation and no one else so you are legally bound to follow your divorce decree. Releasing them to his girlfriend could be disasterous if something medically came up. See what I mean.You can go backto court to remodify the visitation rights to include the father being there when the kids are. If you can prove he doesnt wat anything to do with them then the courts will severely curtail his visitation rights. Good luck
2007-07-07 12:53:43 · answer #5 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would go to the judge that granted you the joint custody (if possible)and tell him/her about what is happening. that is what i would do.
good luck
and make sure you have PROOF!
2007-07-07 12:54:43 · answer #6 · answered by Dani 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can always go to court and change your parenting plan.
2007-07-07 13:56:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah...it sucks but you still have to send them. in the meantime i would go back to court and fight. maybe he should only have them every other weekend or something.
2007-07-07 12:50:40 · answer #8 · answered by VW Girl :o) 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋