My husband always says he's never in the mood, and if I leave it up to him, we could go for months without sex. Whenever we do have sex, it lasts ten minutes and I get nothing out of it. He puts in no effort, as if he just wants to get it overwith. I've tried everything to get him in the mood, and I know I'm very attractive. Most men would kill to have a wife with a sex drive like mine. It seems like he doesn't care. Can I just divorce him for that reason?
2007-07-07 11:23:13 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like it's not just the sex that is the problem. He seems to have no emotional ties to be with you. Sex is an important part of the bond 2 people share in expressing the love they have for one another and if this is the way he is receiving you and acting, then there are other issues involved as well. If you feel you have done all there is to do and yet still, the same behavior exists, you must make that decision as to whether it is time to permanently sever your relationship with him. Your happiness is what counts.
2007-07-07 11:28:41 · answer #1 · answered by Diva777 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, just call it Irreconcilable Differences. That way you won't have to go into details, plus the Judge won't give you a sideways look when you are sitting in chambers asking for your divorce.
If you love your husband and are just currently frustrated with the situation, maybe you should have him seen by his Physician. It sounds like he's possibly depressed. That drastically lowers the libido. If so, with proper medication, it should be back to normal.
I would exhaust all available options before just filing for divorce. I mean, if he were to be in some terrible car accident and was paralyzed from the waist down, would you divorce him because he was unable to have sex with you?
Another thing, you may very well be "very attractive" BUT he is your husband, you vowed to love, honor & cherish him through good times & bad times. Do you not think that is important?
Get him to the doctor and try not taking it so personally. I'm almost willing to bet that he is depressed.
Good luck!
2007-07-07 11:37:43 · answer #2 · answered by ♥Aimee♥™ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You probably could claiming irreconcilable differences, but that seems like a pretty shallow reason for divorce. You married him for better or for worse, guess what? This may be the worse part. How old is your husband? if he is in his forty's maybe there is a medical reason he's not into sex. He could be having some ED issues, or a drop in his testosterone could be to blame. Have you talked to your husband about this? Maybe there is something bothering him that might lead to his not wanting sex. If you truly love him then try to figure out whats going on and work towards making it better. If you're just trying to find some one to have sex with then head for the door.
2007-07-07 11:31:03 · answer #3 · answered by Odie 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hi. i can understand you must be frustrated. about divorce, have you tried talking to your husband to see if he has a problem, maybe he's stressed at work or not feeling very well, or even tired - all this thinks can cause sex drive to decrease. just think about that day you married him, would you really want to throw away all the love and trust you have for a problem that could well be ressolved. what you both need is compromise, see a marriage councilor, talk to each other. there are many reasons why he may not be in the mood.
2007-07-07 11:50:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
does he know your seriously talking about leaving him? that might make a difference. my husband isn't very sexual either I'm a hound dog for loving. I'm feeling you here. but if he knows the severity and is willing to get counseling. maybe he had some sexual trauma as a young man? why don't you give a good go at fixing this first.
2007-07-11 11:03:03 · answer #5 · answered by mytwoboyz1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only reason God gives for divorce is adultery. But He also says that once you are married your bodies belong to each other and that you shall not with hold from each other. So he is doing wrong, by denying you sex. Go to counseling yourself, because he probably won't go and see if there is anything you can do to change the situation. If not then start doing yourself.
2007-07-07 12:17:47 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Divorce is an extreme situation, but if you aren't happy then it is time to move on. Does he want to change? Does he care that he isn't meeting your sexual needs? Has he been checked by a doctor to ensure there is nothing wrong? I would answer these questions first before divorcing him. If you have kids, you need to consider their needs too. Best of luck!
2007-07-07 11:29:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have you talked to him yet? That would be the adult thing to do. There has to be a reason for this, guys look forward to putting it somewhere their entire lives. If he has stopped having sex with you, and enjoying it, he might be getting it from somewhere else. A cheater will "perform" his duties once in a while though just to keep your mind off him cheating. I thought maybe it might be medical, but if he still does it with you, then it sounds like its just a lack of interest.
2007-07-07 12:07:14 · answer #8 · answered by D G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage counseling. If that doesn't work then get a divorce. Also, behavior like his could indicate that he is cheating. Good luck.
2007-07-07 11:28:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I've seen it be grounds for divorce before. But it depends on your state. In some states, you don't need to have a reason at all (I think).
2007-07-07 11:26:15 · answer #10 · answered by kellogg_79 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋