what can i do??

Question

i love my mom to death but she aint really giving me the space i need she still thinks ima kid im 15 and i dont want to spend that much time with her as i used to but no matter what ima always have time for her but she s afriad ima go out and get pragnet like my aunts did wen they was 15 but im not like that my momz always gonna be my best friend she still is we still spend time with each other but sometimes i want to be alone and i tell that but then she thinks somethings wrong when theres not but i tell her i like to be alone sometimes to think and write poems and songs but shes always trying to be under me to protect me from the world for once i wish i could make my own desitions for once what can i do? tell her to leave me alone but i dont want to be mean about but sometimes i need space.... I NEED HELP

Answer 1

Let me tell you a story.
My daughter is 17, just graduated from high school.
When she was 15 and 16, she didn't want to spend any time with her mother at all.
Always wanted to go "hang out" with her friends. Didn't even want to sit still long enough to watch a movie with her mother.
Don't get me wrong, my daughter works a lot of hours and makes her own money, and has for the last 2 years.
She said she couldn't wait for graduation, because the day after she was moving out of our house. She didn't want to tell us where she was or was going, didn't want to tell us who she was with or what time she would be home.
She came right out and said that her mother's meddling was the reason she wanted to get out of our home because mom was making things so unbearable.
He mother wanted her to stay on the birth control shot, but my daughter insisted that it made her gain weight (which is a side effect) and that she "wasn't stupid" and that she would NEVER have babies and knew better than to get pregnant.
Guess what.
She didn't even wait until graduation, she moved out a month before.
She is now pregnant, due in January.
She calls and comes over every single day.
She doesn't go anywhere besides work without her mother.
Every time she needs anything or any little drama comes up in her life she runs to her mother.
She expects her mother to take her to all her Dr. appointments and to deal with everything that comes up.
All I am saying is, BECAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR.

Answer 2

Well you can always sit down and talk with her. Tell her that you love her very much and that things will never change between you two but that you are getting older and need time to be alone. Tell her that, that doesn't mean you're doing anything bad it's just that you need time to think about life and express yourself by writing poems, song, and etc. Also tell her that both of you will be bestfriends forever and that you will tell her everything so not to worry because you will keep her informed. Well i hope i helped =)

Answer 3

It's time to have a serious talk with your mom. Reassure her that you don't want to make the same mistakes your aunts made and that it will be a guiding light when it comes to boys/relationships.

She's having a hard time, too, especially if you two are so tight. (She probably feels that you're pulling away from her -- which you are but not in a bad way (you need space to find yourself; an identity outside of your mom, your friends, etc.). It might help to explain to her that you are sensitive to her wanting to be around 24/7 to protect you but that she needs to start trusting you to make good choices.)

Start with baby steps. If you show her that you are a responsible person who makes good choices, she might ease up on you. Also, perhaps you two can plan regular mother-daughter outings so that she feels included in your life. Good luck.

Answer 4

Time for a heart to heart with your mom and explain to her just what you have written here. Maybe over a lunch, a coffee or cup of tea. Without getting excited keep everything at a low key you will get a better response if no one is on the defensive.

Answer 5

just tell ur mom that u want a little space she will understand hopefully thats al u can do

Answer 6

just tell her, u won't kill her, she won't have the big heart attack.