To all loners, are you really a loner?

Question

I would like to know if all loners really like to be alone or deep in their heart they actually want to have friends and people to be around them.
In my secondary school I have clique and I felt that my whole class is my friends, I can communicate with almost all of them. However I really behave like a loner now in my college, I have no clique in class and totally a loner. Most of the time during lecture I will always sit alone as other ppl just sit with their clique or sits is reserved for their clique's ppl. Most of the time I will be sitting alone, but deep inside I actually long for a best friend or a clique. Sometime when i sit with them and if they see any other ppl sit alone they will tease them for being loner and have no friends. It sounds so pathetic, I'm sure they also said the same thing to me behind my back whenever I am alone.
I don't think I am going to force myself to get a common topic with them. Although the feeling of being alone is awful but I know it will end.

Answer 1

lets say... you and me need to be friends...then we can leave our lonersome selves . (im a big time loner with no life.)

myspace. me.

www.myspace.com/black_cloak_emo

Answer 2

I need balance in my life. I need to feel like I have a few good people in my life that care about me, but I also need my time alone. I have always been this way. If Ive been going out with friends every night of the week, I feel a strong urge to stay in alone. Its refreshing for me. I also cant stand having a roomate. Dont worry, if you keep an open mind- Im sure you will start to make more friends. A good thing to do is become a regular at a bar, if youre 21. Ive made so many friends just by going and sitting at my local bar every week.

Answer 3

from what you wrote, it seems to me that YOU are the one who should take the most responsibility for the situation. Seems like you purposfully are imposing aloneness upon yourself. In high school it was easy to be part of a clique..but in college, most students are seperated from their old friends and have to make new ones..also, I believe that the others are not shunning you..most likely they are just letting you be whom ever you want to be.. if you choose to sit alone, they probably think that you want to be left alone.. there is an old saying that " opportunity knocks for the people who are already on the dance floor".. If you want to dance, then get on the dance floor. DO something, become a part of the action or you will become a sullen loner who thinks that people are talking about you.. say hello to someone..you will be amazed how that opens things up.. most people in general who see someone as standoffish presume that they are a little weird and the more you standoff the more they will think you to be weird..and then they will begin to not trust you.. I suggest you do this...if you have the guts.. ask your instructor if you can address the class for a couple of minutes.. if you get the permission.. walk to the front and say this.. I am ____ and I have made a dumb mistake.. I did not know anyone when I came to this school and I still don't.. I probably have made myself out to be a loner, or weird, or something.. but the truth is.. I am a pretty good guy.. if anyone is interested in knowing a pretty good guy.. just look behind you.. I am the dumbell sitting by himself.. thanks.. If you have the courage to do that..then you will be amazed at how many friends you will have.. in a herd of cattle there is always a bell cow.. that is the leader.the rest are followers.. all you have to do is decide which one are you going to be.. a member of the herd or a bell cow.. good luck

Answer 4

Depends on the type of loner. Some loners really are tweaked out by any social interaction. Other loners like me want to have great friends, but grow tired of childish people and generic nightlife. Before you know it you're at home with no friends and no need for them. It happens outta nowhere sometime in the mid to late 20s. It's normal and is a part of growing up. Adults are too set in their ways to successfully be part of a social group. Too many ways for nerves to get rubbed the wrong way.

Answer 5

People aren't "loners" by choice. Sometimes they simply have no peers. When too large a percentage of people surround a person, and these cannot share this person's rare perspective on life and the world, a person can either pretend to see other than they really do, but an air of mystery is always observeable.

People get angry and frustrated in their attempts to understand me personally, and the feeling is mutual. In the end...I have simply found that living alone is a happier alternative. Ways to distance myself from others are boundless.

Answer 6

It would be great having lots of friends, but in reality most people seem to irk me in one way or another. I do have some friends, but I've never had any close friends. I see being a loner as the lesser of two evils at the moment.

Answer 7

I would think most people want to have friends around them and won't want to be alone. However I feel that having friends around us is a good thing but at certain point of our life we have to be alone for a while. You just be yourself and don't try hard to fir into your friends circle, true friends will always prepared to accept who you are and not shun away from you.

Answer 8

i do not consider myself to be a loner but you will not see alot of people around me. i have a few choice friends that i enjoy being with. i don't need to be with a lot of friends. i'd rather have one or two really good friends than 20 so-so friends.

Answer 9

of course it will end. being shy or introverted ,or lack of others agreeing with your opinions,is not a loner.
by being alone doesn't construe loneliness.
a loner is someone who walks a path,with never ending twists and turns,,,,,,alone,and chooses such.
take care.

Answer 10

I would think most people want to be liked and have friends round them. however it doesn't always work like that, and sometimes we find ourselves on the outside looking in for whatever reason. don't try too hard to fit in, just be yourself. it's one thing to have alot of acquaintances, but more rewarding to have one or two really good Friends. Don't let it worry you.