do you think that this matters?

Question

i am 16 and matture for my age and i am with a man who is 27. i love him very much and he loves me. we talk for hours every day and never run out of things to say to each other when ever we are together its like there is no one else in the world i feel completly safe with him and know he will never hurt me and i will never hurt him. i have recently found engagment ring brouchers at his house but he doesnt know i have seen them. do you think the age difference matters?

i live in the uk and the age of concent and the gae u are legaly a adult is 16

Answer 1

age certainly matters when one of them is underaged.

he is an adult, why can't he find someone his own age to be with?

i think your mom needs to do something about this.

Answer 2

Legal age of consent or not, I think any 27 year old man should want a mature woman, not a very young, TOO young girl. At 16 you still don't know yourself well enough (and you're not done developing your personality) to make a good choice on what kind of man you need to make you happy. If you were 25 the age difference would not be a big deal since by then you'd be old enough to have your personality set and be much more likely to know what kind of man you need.

At this point you should step back from the relationship and concentrate on things you need to do. Get a good education, find out who you are, and what the world is about. Then after you finish growing up, IF you both are still interested in each other (if it is real love it will NOT hurt to wait), then you can pursue the relationship.

Honestly, the main reason a man would want someone so young is so that he can control you and who you are & become. And a controling man is the hardest thing to live with, and often abuse follows. I've seen it happen way too many times. So please stop, think, and ask for help with this from your parents, or another trusted adult.

Answer 3

When you are 16 you like to think you are mature but how could you be? your hormones are doing the rumba most of the time.
Because you don't play with dolls, your body is developed and you know about sex does not make you mature.
If you were 'mature' we would not be having this conversation. Matured is when you know when to walk away from something that even though it makes you feel good it really is bad for you. In addition if you were that mature you'd be wondering why is this MAN with you at all?
Typically age does not matter I was married to someone 10 yrs younger than me for 11 yrs.
But in your case it's a difference between as adult and a very young teen. I do not know what state you are in but most states have laws against this for a reason.

Answer 4

I have friends who met when he was her teacher and she was 15 and he was 30. After a marriage and divorce on both their parts, they met again when she was over 30... and they are now married.

What they did that was right was NOT get sexually involved.
In most cases a 27 year old man is taking advantage of a 16 year old girl. Your description sounds like he really cares for you. If this is true, then you two will NOT get sexually involved and will choose to keep it a friendship ONLY.

At this time the age difference is A HUGE INSURRMOUNTABLE OBSTACLE. and Sexual interaction is called statutory rape!

Say nothing about the brochures. If he asks you to marry him, you would probably have to have parental consent, depending on which state you live in.

As you get older, this kind of age difference would matter less, but right now it's too big an age difference.

Answer 5

Sure the age difference matters. It may not seem like it but it will. I was 25 and my now ex husband was 37. The age difference didn't seem like a big deal for a while but became a problem after a while. My guy now is only 2 years older than me. We have everything in common. Your 16 enjoy being young while it lasts. You have alot of time to think about marriage. If you have found your soulmate, he will still be there in 2 years when you are an adult.

Answer 6

It matters a lot! You are way too young. I know, when I was 16 I was involved with a 26 year old. Come to find out he just wanted someone he could form into his own "perfect woman". I was just the right age for him to do this. Thankfully, my mother stepped in. Now I am almost 40 and can see clearly that he would have been the worst thing to happen to me. At the time, though, I hated my mother and thought he and I were just perfect together. At 16 you have no clue what life is about. I know you don't want to hear that, but it is the truth.

Answer 7

Youve got alot of growing up to do before you could ever become even close to being mature for your age. Any guy thats 27 that even thinks about a kid, and thats all you are, sorry, has a mental problem that could very well fall under a phedophile definition here. He could be charged with contributing to the delinquincy of a minor, or statutory rape amongst other things. There is absolutely no reason known to man that an adult has to engage in any kind of relationship (other than being related) you speak of with a minor. There are plenty of women his age out here. This has illegal aspects here, so go be 16 and leave this guy alone and grow up. Nothing good could or will come out of this

Answer 8

At your age the age difference does matter. If you were 21 and he was 32, that would be different. I'm 42 and my husband is 30. We started dating 7 years ago and married 3 years ago. We were both adults. You should finish school and focus on YOUR future and 5 years down the road, if you two are still together, then great. If not, then you know you weren't meant to be together and you figured that out while growing.

Answer 9

I think right now in your life the age difference wont matter but you really need to consider the future . right now he is young and so are you , but one day there will come a time that he will begin to slow down and that may effect you, when he is in his mid 40's you will be in your mid 30's , which is the peak of your life , and you will still be wanting to go and do things , that he may not be interested in anymore . but then on the other hand you may get married and do just fine for the rest of your life , I have no problem with age differences, I am just trying to help you think through it so that maybe you can make a clear decision. there is no way to predict the future, all we can do is pray hard , and ask for guidence and except the right answer when we get it from God. good luck to you .

Answer 10

It might not matter later in your life, but right now it does. You are still a child...you still have maturing to do. A 27 year old NORMALLY is adult, but it makes me wonder why this one feels like it is okay to be with a sixteen year old girl.

Don't rush your life and try to be grown up so fast. Enjoy being young...there is time for all the love, engagement, marriage, etc...later. Date some guys your own age and have fun.

Answer 11

If you were 30 and he was 41 it would not matter.. but given the fact you are only 16, it matters a lot.. to the fact that you are not grown yet.,.. you may believe that you are very mature for your age, but we all did when we were sixteen. You need to experience life, experience yourself and find yourself before you make any life decision such as marriage.
If this man knew you enough, and loved you enough, he would respect that you have to grow up....
Are your parents still involved in your life? At sixteen I would not be letting my daughter date a 27 year old.
Good luck, and don't ruin your life....