I Love my wife - but I am not IN - Love with her. Help me figure this one out!
2007-07-07 07:34:06 · 13 answers · asked by clubmaster300087 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Believe it or not folks (this goes out to the responders of your question as well) you're not always going to be "in-love" with your spouse. It's good though that you say you still love her. That's a real marriage, a real relationship. When you get past all the lovey dovey moments, when you get past not having that "feeling", when you learn all her faults yet you still love her. There's not thing wrong with loving your wife and not being "in-love" all the time. Try taking her out on a date. The kind of date you might have gone on before you were married.
Best wishes!
2007-07-07 08:35:56 · answer #1 · answered by Beautiful Awakening 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You love her, you're just not INFATUATED with her right now. I've been through this so many times. Infatuation is not a 24/7 deal, so you're normal. The problem is that, right now, your relationship is probably kind of boring and you'd like more romance, right? You will need to add some purpose to your lives together. Take a class where you both learn something new together and have to study together, etc. Or take up a sport. Or even better--volunteer a couple times per week together at some local charity. You will both feel good about helping other people together...it will make you feel like a team and you'll be proud of each other...admiration plays a big part in infatuation...so do something together that lets you admire each other.
2007-07-07 14:59:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Marriage isn't always hot & heavy and full of passion ALL the time.. Marriage has MANY up and downs at times it feels like you are no longer IN LOVE when actually it is simply in a cruise control mode.
Marriage is about standing tough when it seems you are on the down low. Marriage is about sticking with the one you love remember the vows??
Talk with people who've been married for a long time they will tell you when you stay and work through those tough times that is when real love blooms giving way to a new begining
I say hang in there wait and see.
2007-07-07 15:01:17 · answer #3 · answered by theladygeorge 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That line is BS of the highest order.
"In love" means that you are having some really nice cloud 9 emotions...you get all happy inside when she's around and you get shivers when she kisses you. That kind of thing, right?
Well, that part of love is just a SMALL PART of the whole thing.
LOVE is not just about your gushy, cloud nine FEELINGS. Love is a commitment. A covenant that you make together. Feelings will come and go throughout the relationship, as long as you keep the covenant THAT YOU MADE with her.
So if you don't "FEEL" lovey any more, that doesn't mean that you don't love her....it means that you aren't interested in holding up your end of the covenant anymore. If you were a REAL MAN you would get that.
2007-07-07 14:50:03 · answer #4 · answered by lady_phoenix39 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
To love someone is just that...there are no 'in' or 'out' exits.
You may be at the point of your relationship where you may not like her all that much, and that's because of reality and your responsibilities are setting in. It's apparent that you are having difficulties adjusting to her flaws and your willingness to compromise.
Now you can either choose to be a willing participant and work out your dilemma, or you can do what many are doing today...looking for the nearest escape route. The choice is yours.
Be blessed in your choosing.
2007-07-07 14:56:29 · answer #5 · answered by Decent 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible to fall out of love. Sounds like the two of you just need to spice things up a bit. Have a nice romantic evening out, dinner and dancing. Remember what it was that made you fall in love with her in the first place. Stay strong, there are still some embers, just stoke the fire.
2007-07-07 14:45:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude then you have a problem ! Does she work outside of the house ?It is the role of a man to be the hunter gatherer. Greed has overtaken our country.Many women could stay home and find ways to earn money but they want more and more ! Men too want bigger and better toys ! People just need to learn to be satisfied. There are many jobs on-line plus many home-assembly jobs, I will pray for you both ! Love is everything !
2007-07-07 15:03:58 · answer #7 · answered by lonewolf 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should be talking to her about it not us...but since you ask i think that if you really love her and would like this to work out you should go see a marriage counselor and figure out where in the realationship did you find yourself falling out of love with her and why...if that doesn't work out then i suppose you guys are not meant to be...im someone who is very optimistic and belives every marriage can work out as long as both want it to work and and actually try...best of luck to and i hope everything works out..but seriously talk to her about it not us
2007-07-07 14:39:59 · answer #8 · answered by pinky1128 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In order to be really happy in your marriage, you should be IN love with your wife. If she is IN love with you and you are not IN love with her, then you are being unfair to her by staying in this relationship. Please sit down with her and have a serious discussion and figure out where things stand. It may be best to let her go and move on.
2007-07-07 14:39:32 · answer #9 · answered by Rogue 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Ditto! Lady Phoenix I could not have said it better myself.
2007-07-07 14:53:43 · answer #10 · answered by Dorothy D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋