She drank when we dated but now she drinks on a daily basis and can drink more than my guy friends. Should i do anything about it or just leave it alone? My question is: to what degree am I responsible?
2007-07-07 06:49:10 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If you still count her as your friend, then yes you have a responsibility to a degree. That is to voice your concern, and let her know why you think she might have a problem. If this fails you might discuss this with her family to let them know thay might need to pay more attention.
On the other hand, you cannot take responsibility for her problems. Do not let her blame you for her problems. many addicts will look for a scapegoat rather than look within themselves to see the true weakness. These are her demons not yours. She is the one who decides when to drink and how much.
Ultimately, whether she addresses this issue or not lies with her. You cannot fix someone who does not acknowledge they need fixing and who refuses to take responsibility and accountability for their own problems and actions.
You can always let them know if they do not shape up you are moving on and will no longer have time for their B.S. No one says you must hang around and watch some one self destruct who you care for or once cared for. Because, after you voice your concern the ball is in her court. If she chooses to make the right decision or not is out of the scope of your power.
Alcoholism can be very tragic and touches a lot of people on the peripheral of the issue because of the way the alcoholic interacts with those people around them. Its a bad disease and condition. I wish you luck my friend.
If you want to speak to other regarding this you might look into an AA meeting and ask them advice.
I
2007-07-07 07:05:33 · answer #1 · answered by Alvin W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie when your dealing with someone who has an addiction issue it's never easy. My mom is an alcoholic. Sometimes she's normal, sometimes she is happy drunk and sometimes she is angry drunk chasing you out of her house with a shot gun. There really isn't anything that you can do to get her help if she doesn't want it. What you can do for yourself is go to AA meetings. You can look them up on the Internet and see where they have a program meeting close to where you live. Good luck. you are not responsible for her actions and you have every right to leave her. she has a disease. talk to the people AA
2007-07-07 06:56:56 · answer #2 · answered by JillardG 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really don't have much responsibility in the situation, providing she isn't harming herself (yes, I realize by drinking she is harming herself) or others, for example, driving drunk. Ultimately it's her choice to drink and it's going to be her choice to stop, if she chooses to stop. However, if you believe her drinking is truly harming her, then you can get professional help for her, whether it is from police or taking her to an ER, etc. Otherwise, I would suggest talking to her about her drinking, saying you feel concerned about her increase in drinking over time. Check out detox programs in your area (look in the phonebook or call a mental health agency in your area) and suggest detox if she's wanting to quit drinking, or suggest AA meetings. Like I said before, ultimately it's her choice whether or not she stops drinking, but you can offer alternatives for her and just be there for her.
2007-07-07 07:21:32 · answer #3 · answered by Angelia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do no longer understand... Why might it truly is your duty to assist your EX-female chum get rid of her nasty eating conduct?!? It almost sounds as while you're experiencing emotions of guilt or something. Why could you? Did you rigidity her to drink? have you ever pushed her or inspired her to drink? Your former female chum is a grown woman, I collect? hence she is and can be a hundred% to blame for her very own unwell movements, am I perfect? in my view, i do no longer think of that it is your duty to do something approximately it until... until you have now grow to be quite good & close acquaintances, perhaps? If it is unquestionably the case, you're able to constantly help her AS a pal, why no longer? yet having pronounced that, do you realize a thank you to assist alcoholics? that's a affliction, you realize... right this is a link which could pastime you, who is familiar with? good success which incorporate your little quandary & very own challenge, lol!
2016-10-20 04:46:43 · answer #4 · answered by xie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you are threatening her and are forcing her to drink, you are not responsible. Its up to her if and when she wants to stop.
2007-07-07 06:59:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ex is the ONLY one who can do anything about her problem.
No matter how much you care, she has to want it for herself.
2007-07-07 06:58:26 · answer #6 · answered by surffsav 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋