I got a phone call from him at 3am this morning Ive told him he can sleep in my spare room. He was leaving her 5 years ago and I convinced him to stay telling him that the greener fields were never that green when you got there. Am i doing the right thing?
2007-07-06 19:13:54 · 12 answers · asked by D 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
JMc I am certainly not a fan of his wife or vice versa.
2007-07-06 19:21:48 · update #1
His wife was having an affair and probably still is but he brings in a good income.
2007-07-06 19:52:13 · update #2
Just be a good friend to him and support him when he needs it. he will make his own decisions and you cant interfere with that just give our opinion when it is asked for and not all the time. be sensitive to his feelings as he is bound to be hurt by the situation and obviously loves her to have gone back in the first place.
2007-07-06 23:14:56 · answer #1 · answered by Giggle Angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, in the short run you're dong absolutely the right thing to help your friend - but let's also look at the bigger picture.
Hard luck about the marriage bust-up. And now -
It's time to look at practical details. It's a bad move to leave just because she says so. If he's off after another woman, it's a different story - but leaving the house just because his wife wants him to makes it almost certain that she will have the house when the divorce comes along. Hasn't he thought of that? I bet his wife has, or why isn't she moving out to someone's spare room?
In the meantime, she has the use of a house (is he still paying the mortgage?) and he has to find, at his own cost, somewhere to live. He can't live in your spare room until he retires!
In his own interest, he should get back in there at once. If the marriage is mendable, that's almost always better than the alternative. If it's not, he should sit tight and wait for her to move.
Are there children? If there are, it's another (the best) reason for staying put. Children need two parents. As well as that, it's really bad from every point of view, for them to grow up with the idea that men can be just shunted around simply because a woman says so. Men hold up half of heaven.
2007-07-06 19:54:05 · answer #2 · answered by Michael B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well to offer a sanctuary to anyone in need is doing the right thing. As for convincing him to stay with his wife whether that was wise or not depends on lot of factors which you have not mentioned. So it is difficult to say whether you was right or wrong at that time but now you are doing the right thing.
2007-07-06 19:49:10 · answer #3 · answered by hopeless 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Giving a friend a place to stay, is the right thing to do. If i were you id give him the shoulder he needs, let him voice how he feels. Your right the grass isnt always greener on the other side, but he has to see that for himself.
2007-07-06 19:26:38 · answer #4 · answered by mazza 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on circumstances with the home they are in, does it belong to the both of them? or is it just hers, if it is the both of theirs then why should he move out not unless he has been a bad boy
2007-07-06 19:38:08 · answer #5 · answered by Janet C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should he leave, unless he's guilty of something, if not he should tell her to leave, as for doing the right thing, well what is the right thing ?
2007-07-06 19:19:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should go stay with a male friend, you will get part blame for him leaving even though she asked him to.
2007-07-06 19:46:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He needs to stay somewhere. Good for you for being a good friend.
2007-07-06 19:18:54 · answer #8 · answered by lulu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seem.s like you and his wife dont get along from the typing in my opion?
2007-07-06 19:33:02 · answer #9 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are friends with his wife as well.
I CAN SEE TROUBLR AHEAD.
2007-07-06 19:18:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋