my dads ruining my life and i dont know what to do?

Question

im 14 and im not allowed 2 do anything. he has so many strict rules and im always in trouble because theres to many of them. im on a friends computor now cos i the only computor we have is in his study room if i set foot in there im dead. whenever i do something wrong he spanks me and its not fair because he hardly ever does it to my little sisters. whenever i go out with friends i have to be back at around 9 cos i always have 2 be in bed at 10:30! i tryed standing up to him once and he got so mad! i can never have a laugh with him pining out something wrong in everything i do! the thing that gets me the most is the spankings,they hurt so bad and he doesnt really care!. i hate it when he spanks me and i really wish he would stop but he doesnt. my mums always at work. when shes at home she just ignores everything.i dont know why their doing this to me. im not alowed to get angry and lately i really feel like screamin my head off. dont know what to do. Mytir.

Answer 1

oh you poor little thing!
I don't know what else to suggest but this works usually for me.

When your dad is in a good mood sit down and talk with him, tell him how you feel. If he gets mad pull the crying trick and maybe that'll soften him up enough to listen to you.

If that doesn't work talk to your mom when she's home and maybe she'll talk to your dad.

Answer 2

you may not understand this now but some day you will be glad you had a parent that set ground rules for you. just look around at the kids who's parents don't give a da-- and let them run and do as they please. most of those kids will end up on drugs, jail, or in a psychiatrists office. 9 pm curfew is plenty late for a 14 year old to be out. if you feel some of the other rules are unfair then tell your father you would like to set down and talk face to face with him about the rules and if there could be some compromises. i bet he will at least listen. and since the computer is off limits to you ask him if you earn money for one can you get one that you can use. tell him you would even be willing to let your sister use it. as far as spankings, i think your a little to old for them any more. talk to your dad about that too and see if there is any other punishments he can dish out instead of spankings.

Answer 3

Sweetie, I'm sure he is just trying to protect you b/c they love you so much. I am a mom and I used to feel the same way about my parents, but now that I am a parent I am scared for my kids to do things. It really is hard being a parent. Try asking your dad if you can please talk to him and start off the conversation by telling him that you don't want yall to start an arguement or get spankings but that you would like to have a friendly relationship with him and tell him what hurts you and what yall can do to make things better. hang in there and be calm about it. good luck.

Answer 4

It depends.
Do you really love your parents? Would you miss them if you ran away?
If you really want them to care, or at least KNOW if they care, try this[it might sound a little crazy]:
Go on Amazon. Purchase one or two mini cameras, putting one in your dad's study when he's sleeping or something, and one in their room. Plan an overnight sleepover with a friend, telling the friend and the friend's parent it's okay with your mom and dad. Your parents won't know where you are, and if they care, they'll be worried sick. x] Lol, there is probably no way you'd do that.

Answer 5

As hard as it is to be 14 sometimes there are things we dont understand at that age! Have you tried speaking to your councelors at school! Or is there any type of program you're school offers where you can sit down and talk to someone about this? If not sure, please research and if you have no where to turn, please talk to a teacher. Mention your hard times and basically everything you wrote on this email. Some of your problems could be something you are just not seeing at this age (like your curfew is not bad 10:30 is a good time to go to bed) and then again your father is being unfair in other points of view. Please, you need somenone to talk to.

Answer 6

ok:

first thing: 10:30 on a school is perfectly reasonable for you age. my 14 year old son goes to bed at that time.

at your age your too old to be spanked, i dont spank mine anymore. BUT all you have to do is behave. I know you might feel like rebeling at your age but you wont win. Try respecting him and doing what he says. i know this isnt the ansewer you want but it is the only way you are going to get him to lighten up.

Answer 7

you're 14 and still get spanked? that's just wrong. you're father is wrong. i'm sorry i'm not much help but maybe talk to a relative like an aunt or uncle or grandparents about this

Answer 8

hey u r still 14.........u r still young enough to be spanked.......it sounds like u r a guy...........trust me............they r only protecting u...........from the harshness from the reality of the world...........and as for your dad not lettin u use his computer, is probly cause he is afraid u will do porn, and if they let u stay out late u might get into drugs and the other crap teenagers do........cause their parents don't give a damnn........as far as i can say u r dammnnn lucky.........cause u have no idea as of how much soo many kids would put up with your parents rules.......jst to have parents and know that someone cares for them.........so think about it...........millions of orphans and homeless kids would look wat u have as heaven where as u look at wat u have as hell.........

Answer 9

aww im 15 and my dad still spanks me...your description sounds a lot like my life, and parents will be parents...i've been through CPS and foster care isn't fun. i'm sorry, but just hold on till 18. if you need to talk: [e-mail]

Answer 10

what is so strict about hvaing a curfew? be home by 9 and go to bed by 1030 that isnt so bad, what other 'strict' rules are there that you cant do to his satisfaction?