My libido is very low?

Question

I used to be very sexual. Then I got married. Now it's boring. I like porn more than the average girl, and I like to see girls getting treated badly. I don't get to watch it anymore because I like to watch alone. Do you think this is why i have no drive?

And my hubby is aware of what i like but doesn't seem to care too much!

Answer 1

You dont need to get help , there are many people that are like that. People fantasize about many different things. Try one day to watch it and see if your libido increases , if not try picturing what it is that turns you on. Sometimes peoples sex drive decreases and increases for random reasons. medication ect .
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DIDNT NOTICE,, ITS A GIRL WRITING THIS.. " I like porn more than the average girl"

Answer 2

If I can read between the lines, it sounds like your husband doesn't know that you like porn or to watch the rough stuff. It sounds like you hid this passion from your husband while you were dating and now can't figure out a way to tell him. So you can either slip the topic of porn into a conversation to see how he feels or flat out ask him what he thinks. On the other hand, you could have a porn movie playing when he gets home and pretend that a friend dropped it off as a joke and you just wanted to see what it is all about. You should be able to tell by his reaction whether or not he likes porn. Good Luck.

Answer 3

That could be part of the reason as well. I think when people get married after a while if you don't spice up ur relationship it will get boring.

You can try things such as role play, dress up in a sexy lingerie and suprise ur husband when he comes home. Try to live out your wildest fantasies with him, maybe try some of those things u watched on the porn.
Try having sex in different parts of ur house or even outside!

Since u like to see girls gettin treated badly u can let him tie u up and give u good spankin!

Most of all u need to talk to him and express how u feel don't expect him to be a mind reader and know how u feel. Once u have the communication down everything else should fall in place!

Answer 4

No you lack drive because you do not see ourself as a Sexual creature any more.

For some reason you atribute being married to a june cleaver, and you failed to remember that sometimes you have to be a Sharon Stone (basic instinct) Minus the killing =)

It's all about taking control of your actions, HE is your husband, and it's your decision weather you will be his wife, AND MISTRESS. or let someone else fill his sexual need.

Try reading the books listed below. It's very illuminating reading, and part of the solution is find common fantasies you, and your husband share to reignite your fire.

Try doing a striptease, or playing strip poker with him.
it's about quality now, not quantity, and the more planning, "SEDUCTION" you put into it the more fun it becomes.
another idea is go on a picnic, and lay the food out all over your naked body,and invite him to eat, and make him feed you as he does. friuts work well, and so can other items.

Like I said try planing something out, and watch your hubby respond. then take turns each month planning a date. =) and do sneaky things to heighten the antisapation just a bit. =)

God Bless

Answer 5

I don't think the porn has anything to do with your lack of libido. It seems that you are not satisfied with the sexual drive you are getting. It may be that what you want in sex is not what you are getting. all you have to do is talk about it and share your desires and fantasies. many people live a poor sexual life because they are afraid to ask or talk about it simply because they think it is ambarrassing or that the other half would find them stupid ... trust me men and women would love to hear from the other spouse as to what they like and want in bed. open up and you will find the answer.
Trust me i did have the same problem, if you need someone to talk to about it feel free to contact me. Good luck :)

Answer 6

You are leaving it all in the living room (or whereever you watch the porn) I bet that you dont just watch, that you are masturbating as well. Maybe you are tiring yourself out, but in the event you arent ask the doctor next time you get a physical

Answer 7

Talk with your husband, let him know the you are slightly turned on by what you see. Ask him about a "date night." Acting out a scene. Dress slutty, meet him at a bar. Let him pick you up. Take you home. Then he can turn nasty on you. Talking dirty to you, pushing you around, getting rough. Just let him know before hand what the boundries are, and set up a "safe" word for if the roleplaying goes to far.

Sounds like fun to me! Anyone wanna meet me at the bar? lol, jk.

Answer 8

Why don't you watch it with your husband? I sneak it in here and there when I'm alone but I know I still have to treat my man right. As I've gotten older I also try to focus more on sex as an act of togetherness. Maybe more "boring" but definitely more meaningful.

Answer 9

You sound like you like to dominate your partner. You need help changing your attitude about what your marriage is all about. It's not about you. It's about you and your husband. You need to make sure you are pleasing HIM and quit being so self-centered. Change things up in the bedroom or go somewhere for the weekend to have a different environment. It takes two to make things work.

Answer 10

Most likely you are tired and not getting enough rest, eating right etc. Get better and then see.