He always has mean things to say. He treats me like I'm trash. Talks to me with no respect. I don't understand. We were together for 5 years, he left and now has a new girlfriend. Anything I say, he comes back at me with a nasty attitude. Since the break up he hasn't really been there for his son. He never spends a day alone with his son anymore, his girl is always around and our son is so confused. I told him I thought it was to early for our son to be around someone new. He just got mad and says he doesn't care. Anytime he is around me and our son he is mean and hateful to me. Is there away of avoiding all of that bs. I'm almost 7 months pregnant and I can't deal with the pain he causes. It is hurting me and our son and I want to know when he will sop all of this?
2007-07-06 07:13:39 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You don't need the pressure. Get a restraining order against him. Keep him away from you. Especially now. Dont let him around you or the child. It sounds as if he doesn't care anyway.
2007-07-06 07:18:45 · answer #1 · answered by Dannos 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry dear, but there's is really not much you can do due to the fact that he treats you like crap and you try to point it out to him and he seems to defend himself in every way possible. Basically, just get him out of both you and your son's life. If he can't respect you nor his own son then he really isn't the right man or father for both of you. Yes it will be hard to fight for custody and such but if he acts like that towards you everywhere, think of how he could act in the courtroom? So no worries about the custody issue, as far as your pregnacy, having stress into you and the baby will give you the risk to lose the baby. I suggest you should just push him out of both you and your son's life. You can always find someone so much better who can not only be good to you but also be a good father figure to your children. Do it before it's too late, sounds like he could be the violent one and end up hurting you and your children. GOOD LUCK!
2007-07-06 14:29:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have the courts set up his visitation with his son as supervised visitation at a public place. You can even have it done at the police station family visitation room! I hardly think he'll be nasty to you there! And while you're going back to court to this, I'd include something in regards to his girlfriend. My divorce papers state that my ex cannot have a woman stay past 11:00 at his house when my children are there and he cannot have a woman live him whether they are there or not and cannot remarry for at least 24 months after the divorce. This was done for these same reasons....during our separation he took my oldest daughter to spend the weekend with him at his apartment...and I later found out that his girlfriend also spent the weekend there! The point of visitation and joint custody is to spend time with the kids...not your significant other.
2007-07-06 14:23:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lots of hugs sweetie
i know how you feel
first off you have to think bout YOU>>YOUR SON ANS NEW BABY TO BE
you 3 are the most important people now
ok??
put him out of your thoughts
dont open the door to him or accept calls from this man
go and get him for child support and anything else..even a restraining order if your scared of him
also when applying for child support if he can have supervised visitation only with his son
its hard tellign a child why their other parent isnt around
but id jsut tell your son..daddys working..or daddy will be here sometime
its not good to lie but when their small they dont understand
get your child involved with other children his age and doing things like the library movies etc.. this will help occupy his mind..and you need your rest as well..and that includes MENTAL rest
take care of you sweetie
we cant tell you..what you already know as to why hes acting like this..so go on with your life.. take time for you and your children to heal and move on
good luck and hugsssss
sweetie you dont really need that kind of abusive man in your life anyway.. and neither does your children
2007-07-06 14:21:05 · answer #4 · answered by bettym 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he won't. that's the bottom line. Once an @ss, always an @ss. Now, how can you avoid this? well, I am assuming that you are divorced. If not, FILE and do it now. Get the upper hand. Second, you need to document what happens. I assume also you are pregnant with his child. MERCY. You need to get some help for yourself. I'm again, assuming, there are "women's shelters" where you live where you can get counseling. You need to do this, and you need to stand firm. I think you need to make it clear to him that if he continues treating YOUR SON this way, you will take away his visitation rights. If you "play this card", you better be ready to back it up. In fact, I don't know if I just don't play the card and get it over with.
Moving, to me, seems to be an option. You need to get him paying child support and you need to get yourself on your feet. simple as that.
2007-07-06 14:19:31 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. Cellophane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you got yourself a real winner there honey. I know that men can be jerks after break ups or divorce but if you are pregnant just stay away from him for a while. Stress on you is stress on the baby. You don't need drama BS in your life right now. Also, you don't deserve to be treated like that, stand up for your self.
2007-07-06 14:18:14 · answer #6 · answered by Sandy B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh yes. As hard as it's going to be you have to ignore him. Use your family and friends to help you then everything else will fall into place. If he comes back after he realizes what he's done to you, cool. If not, you never once wasted another day or minute expecting him to change. I believe in change, but men have to do it on their own.... women can't make any man change so you have to move on so he can figure that out on his own. Your son and unborn child need you. Pay close attention to them and their needs... not his. Speaking from experience and my outcome was the opposite, but I'm much happier now. Good luck.
2007-07-06 14:38:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has guilt and that is his way of expressing it. However you do not deserve it and either does your son. Move on get strong and get away from this guy. Are you pregnant with his child. Why? If someone treats you this bad, why???? would you put up with it. You have to get some courage and stay clear of him and this girlfriend. You do not need it. Look for someone who likes you and everything else will fall into place.
Good Luck!
2007-07-06 14:18:56 · answer #8 · answered by jjeano661 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is looking for an excuse to not see you or his son and you have the perfect opportunity to get rid of him. Set up child support and any alimony through the court and let him go his own way. He is far too immature to be a good influence on your son. You do not need him.
Take care,
Troy
2007-07-06 14:37:44 · answer #9 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in this situation, your son will be fine, but you have not let got if he can still hurt your feelings. try to let got of him and not care about what he thinks or feels because he is your x and not your present. Let miserable people be miserable my themselves! Live your life to make you happy and if he does his son wrong he will be the one to suffer in the future! Don't pay him no mind! Don't call him, let him call you and when he says something nasty hang up on his @@@ and tell him you will only speak to him if he speaks to you with respect!
2007-07-06 14:19:57 · answer #10 · answered by Racy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋