How many women are raped because they were nice but in being nice put themselves in a dangerous position?

Question

I ask this because driving into work today I went by 2 men broken down on the side of the road. My first gut instinct was to pull over and ask if they needed help but then reason took over and I thought of other women who may have done the same, out of kindness, and paid a heavy price.
What do you think may be the percentage of women who have been raped because they were too nice and paid dearly for it?

It's a scary and sad thing at the same time that I am afraid to pull over and help someone who might be in distress.

I just read over the answers given and honestly some of them make me want to puke.
The idea of "women want it" is the exact reason I am afraid to stop. There are scum (men or women) out there just waiting for the chance to take advantage of "nice" people.

Answer 1

Hi Genevieve,

Most rapes are acquaintance rapes perpetrated by people the women knew and/or trusted. However, as anyone who watches the news would know, the type of rape you just described does happen more than anyone would probably like to admit. I think you were SO wise not to pull over today. Anyone who would tell you (or any other woman) that you were being sexist or selfish or paranoid for not helping those two men, obviously is very uneducated about the dangers women in general have to face in this world. Any one who would advise a lone woman to stop and help TWO men on the side of the road has to be a total moron. To those of you who did advise this; please don't procreate, because if you have a daughter, she might actually think you know what you're talking about and end up suffering dearly for it!

Here is my rule of thumb: If the situation is something I would be embarrassed to call 911 for, then why in the world would I risk my life trying to intercede in it? It would have to be a life or death scenario before I would even consider pulling over, and even with that, I would be calling 911 before I even got out of my car.

Thank you so much for asking this question, Genevieve. I think it may have helped remind many of us that there is no room for "polite" and "nice" when it comes to self preservation. If the situation is that serious, then we need to just call 911 and leave it to the experts! Stay safe Ladies, and remember that there is a very good reason why chivalry should be left to the men (we're reminded of it every day when we watch the news)!

Answer 2

I agree with you. It is sad that in this day and age we cannot help people. It is dangerous for anyone to stop and help these days because you honestly do not know who the predators are. I read a shocking story once about a man and his wife, with their 2 year old daughter, using the scam of breaking down so they could rob people, and rape. Shocking! They were finally arrested and charged, and the child was put into foster care, but after that it really made me think twice about stopping to help, or giving any assistance on the side of the road.

Even scarier is when you break down and have a flat and are worried about who is going to stop to help you!

Answer 3

Women are raised to be 'nice' and accommodating. I have no idea of the percentages, but personally I know of two, both acquaintance raped, both afraid to make a fuss and both thought the boys were too 'nice' to persist after being told no and then pushed away. One of the girls spoke to the DA, but was told that despite bruises the girl would n't make good case, in the other the girl was so traumatized she just went home and took a bath. Both of them were 'nice'.
If you have a cell, you can call the cops to take care of side of the road problems. Even men have been mugged by a woman looking helpless at the side of a road, until the guy in the woods sneaks up and hits him. Its a dangerous world we live in. Be careful.

Answer 4

Many, but this would apply in the case of aquaintance and date rapes. When a woman's instincts are screaming at her to dump this guy, but he somehow makes her feel like she should be nice to him, and an assault happens.

The situation you describe is less likely to be a setup for a rape, as many people passing could give a description of the men. But it is still better to call for a tow truck, they could do more to help than you could anyway!

Naturally, no one is saying that rape is ever anyone's fault, except the perpetrator. But listen to those instincts. I bet most victims would say they had the feeling they should not do something, and did it anyway.

Answer 5

WOW. Most of the responses to this QUESTION want to make me "puke."

It's too bad you don't allow e-mail, "frax-" I could have avoided pointing out this stupidity in front of everyone:

"But it's the human altruistic impulse, but only women regularly do it - things like opening doors, help gather up scattered shopping, give to charity, visit the sick, send birthday cards."

What in God's name goes on in that mind of yours? Here's a tip- absolutes don't work in the "social sciences" very much.

I continue to see statements like that. That you should just keep going and leave a potentially STRANDED person on the side of the road.

I know the old saying that "paranoia will destroy ya," but this is seriously just going a little far. You may say that "I don't understand because I'm male," but, as the "person" I quoted mentioned, altruistic tendencies are HUMAN. According to "her," they are predominantly female. I wonder, then- why wouldn't the females responding want to help out a person in need?

THAT is what makes me want to "puke."

As for an appropriate response- check with the major causes of rape from a statistical standpoint- "I was raped when I tried to help someone on the side of the road" will not even be considered because the probability of such a thing happening is so low as to be negligible.

Answer 6

i really think that the percent is lower then we all think they say in rape stats that most happen with someone you know!
it was a high percent i want to say around 80%

but overall just basic crime! that's why i don't stop that and i live in detroit! lol
but someone could just kill you and steal your ride, or rape you, or just beat you down, or steal your identaty and just keep you captive, what ever the case my be it's dangrous to be too nice... now if you have a few people in the car with you the odds are more likely to not have this happen! so i try to stop if i have another MALE with me!

Answer 7

Being nice or not a woman is not to blame for her bad choices when it comes to rape...Many victims are a result of criminals taking advantage of them & a given situation,making the criminal responsible for their haneous acts of violence..Common sense must play a part in a womans daily life and hopefully will keep her out of innocent situations that go bad...Unfortunately society is more violent than ever, everyone must adapt to given situations that govern our everyday lives...=)

Answer 8

Many. Most guys see sexual activity with a less than willing female as only a small inconvenience to the woman. After all, it is only going to take a short time, usually less than 5 minutes, so guys just don't get it. Rape is an act against the will of the victim. Sometimes it's the only way to prevent more serious physical harm: consequently capitulation by the female. So, girls, be judicious when you make choices which will seriously compromise your safety. If the guy acts insulted or hurt, get a cab. You'll be happy with that choice.

Answer 9

I think that's true..lots of women are raped because they want to be nice..but so they get trapped...
the percentage is very high ...40% at least I think..
it's awful...but sometimes you want to be nice..but the fears stop you ...I sometimes feel guilty when I find myself in this position....I have the doubt that I didn't do my duty in helping and being nice with people....but this world is very scary and full of danger ç_ç

Answer 10

At this time in our lives there are many ways of communicating with people that will come to our rescue. My advice is leave it up to them. If there is a major accident thats different you know it's real and you should help.