Im pregnancnt right now and before my ex boyfriend left outside the country we were happy. When he was away he told me that he did not treat me as girlfriend. It hurts when he said that because i accepted him in my house and treated him right and loved him a lot because he'salso the dad of my baby. He just told me that he will just support and send money but until now he did not send and not yet paying his debt to me on which I have no money to pay for the credit card as he used my bro's credit card. I do not know if I will still purue the communication. Some said no because he's nothing but my bro said yes just for the baby. But whenever I ttalk with him it hurts a lot. I only remember the pains he caused me. PLEASE HELP ME!
2007-07-05 17:44:20 · 11 answers · asked by fairy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
ive been there and i can tell u that five years later i am glad that i decided to open the lines of communication again. my childs father and did a lot of bad things to one another before i got pregnant. then after i had my daughter i found he had baby w/ another girl a week after my daughter was born. i hated him, despised him. i wanted to hurt him in the worse way and i did. after that we didnt talk for like 3 yrs. the only person who truly got hurt was our child. she suffered bc of out immature ignorance. we are now on speaking terms bc of our daughter and she is so happy. she loves her daddy and im glad he is being part of her life. so its up to u if u want him in ur child's life.
2007-07-05 17:51:07 · answer #1 · answered by the_kid_doesnt_care 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships involving children can be tricky when they break up. It's best to remain civil for the childrens sake, they dont want to grow up seeing it's natural to argue and hate.
However, this does not mean you have to show any special favours to the estranged partner, including letting him into your home. Nor does it mean you have to talk to him any great length of time, thus giving him false signs that you are still vulnerable to him by "needing"his company. Any future relationships will feel the strain too, having to put up with your ex's timely appearances and demands.
You should get a mediator, someone who opens the door when your partner pops round, someone who will take and return your child at given times agreed by you. You dont have to face him at all. Even though he's out of the country now, it wont always be that way.
We've all heard the promises of support but usually they come with proviso's, conditions. The fact that your brother is involved, financially also makes things more complicated.
I think you need to see your lawyer, solicitor and involve the help of the social services. Sure they poke their noses in, that's their job, but you run the risk of getting into a situation where more problems will arise if you don't seek the help of professionals from the outset. See your citizens advice counsellors and ask their advice. They will put you in touch with dedicated people who will help.
Think of your child, stay safe.
2007-07-05 18:31:09 · answer #2 · answered by ~☆ Petit ♥ Chou ☆~ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No! you may desire to make a existence on your son and you...i will inform you from journey that your husband won't substitute. If there is everyone on right here that disagrees I doubt they're being straightforward or it truly is going to likely be one in a million. the reality that he dsrespects you in public could desire to talk volumes. You deserve a robust existence. in the previous you progression directly to a diverse guy, get YOU in examine and stand on my own tall and robust. Being a single mom isn't virtually as perplexing as dwelling in hell and hoping that as quickly as your son is sufficiently old you will no longer have 2 men treating you a similar. toddlers learn by ability of occasion. come across a guy which will take care of you like a queen and be a robust occasion on your son and till you do, delight on your son. God Bless You i know you're hurting however the hurting will in no way end till you smash out and bypass away this hell on your previous.
2016-10-19 02:35:06 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
since you are pregnant, you should do whatever makes you happy. that baby will suffer inside you when youget stressed out.
When the baby is born, if the father can be a positive force in the child's life, i would say absolutely do that.
If he is willing to be a father then the child deserves that relationship. take care of yourself while you are pregnant, and when the child is born, give him the chance to be a good father for the sake of the child.
if he cant be a positive role model in the child's live, then dont push it. you can do this on your own, but it will be hard.
good luck, and i hope your child lives a happy healthy life.
2007-07-05 17:49:57 · answer #4 · answered by Kim N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're pregnant and it hurts you to talk to him, don't. It's not good for you or the baby because of the stress it causes. Try talking to him by email. It may not hurt as much. If it does, have your brother talk to him for himself as far as the credit card goes. I'm sure your brother will understand. As far as supporting the baby, I'm sure you can find plenty of help. Everything will be fine, but don't let him hurt you. You don't deserve that. Do what's best for the health of you and your baby.
2007-07-05 17:49:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a loser sweetie and I feel bad for your situation right now...you will need to file child support papers etc..for now, maybe a bit of distance..you need it for your health and the baby.
I know it's too late but why did you get involved with this guy and get pregnant? Please be careful with future relationships and take care of your heart, it now also belongs to the little life you are about to have.
2007-07-05 17:49:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
dun be a silly girl dear...he hurt u...so why u still want to betray urself and hurt urself by talking to him ? u know it hurts..u know it right ? when u hurt, how can u raise the baby ? u need a peaceful heart to raise ur child..just tell ur baby that ur dad has passed away..try as u can not to let ur child know that his dad is such a jerk and that his mom has gone thru so much pain to raise him up...it will make him sad...stop talking to him...dun hurt urself..only u are the person who loves u most
2007-07-05 17:52:59 · answer #7 · answered by sil3nt_h3art 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter how YOU or HE feel about each other you are the parents and need to act mature for you child's sake. It is possible to just speak of only the child and it is actually possible to not to have to speak to each other.. Just agree on visitation and child support and stick to it.
2007-07-05 17:49:10 · answer #8 · answered by Jules 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although it hurts a lot you should think about your child. Would he be a good father? If so I think you should try to set your feelings aside.. Good luck
2007-07-05 17:47:44 · answer #9 · answered by Jamie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he refuse to give you money go to court so by law he have to give you money if else he might go to jail.
You can prob find welfare or gov funding for single moms
2007-07-05 18:03:52 · answer #10 · answered by Frank W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋