I hate myself. I hate the sad and lonely person i've become. I've been betrayed by people I thought were my

Question

friends. Ever time I make a friend, I end up being used and abused. I'm at the end of my rope. I hate this society, I hate the way we are all so isolated from each other. I live in a building with tons of people, but everyone keeps to themselves. I feel like I'm just killing time until death takes me away from here. Can you offer any suggestions for me?

Answer 1

First of all...hang in there! It sounds like you're going through a rough patch socially, and want to reach out to people who are good for you.

Let's take this step by step...
1. Why on earth would you hate yourself? Because you've made some mistakes in trusting the wrong people? Well who's loss is that? Answer: Not yours, you can bring your good will and energy to new friends who will appreciate you and give the same back to you.

2. Okay, so now that the crappy people are out of the way, we can find new people who will be more deserving of your friendship. But how? Have you ever thought of volunteering at a church, school, community center, pet shelter? It will give you meaning, and you'll be meeting new people who by the very nature of the fact they are volunteering tells you the are givers.

3. Your living situation. Do you ever strike up conversations with your neighbors in the lobby, on the elevator, or in the laundry room? Start a conversation, say hello and introduce yourself! Have you ever thought about talking to management about a social event in your community room (even the laundry room would do) where there would be refreshments and music and people could get to know each other?

I know how hard it is to live in a big city (I'm a native New Yorker), but YOU have to be the change in your own life, just sitting at home thinking bad thoughts isn't going to make you feel better, but doing and seeking good will!

Good luck to you my friend and peace be with you!

Answer 2

You are putting yourself down way too much, first of write a list of what your good qualities are, because everybody has them! Doesn't matter how long this takes just do it! Secondly join a school team, doesn't matter what it is but join one because this will get you talking to people and will enable you to make some friends! We had a guy who was a bit like you who joined our drama group, very pale, never really talked to anyone, but we had to talk to him in group exercises etc. and we all soon realised he was a really decent funny guy, he was just mega shy and we all became friends with him! As for the whole bad kisser thing erm I think you'll find EVERYBODY, literally no execption is a bad kisser to begin with! Even your friend will have started off crap... Why not try and up your self confidence a bit by giving yourself a bit of a makeover aswell, get some new clothes maybe get your hair done? I know that all sounds a bit superficial but most of the time how you feel on the outside has a huge impact on how you look on the inside too! Your in a spiral of depression at the moment and every small thing that happens that in a normal situation would seem relaly insignificant seems huge and depressing because it just adds to the pile of depressing things all stocked up. To break this spiral you need to have a few changes in your life, seriously join a few clubs, maybe get a paper round, start putting yourself out there a bit trust me you will begin to enjoy it quickly and wonder what the hell you were doing before. Also anyone that picks on you is quite clearly insecure and looking for someone else they deem to be insecure to pray on to hide their own insecurities, don't allow them the opportunity anymore, don't be insecure, be proud of who you are, every person has an equal right to have friends and a fun social life and nobody is deemed ugly by everybody as we all have different taste in looks! Seriously go make that list now.

Answer 3

Do not do this to yourself! Look at the question you just posted. I hate myself. I hate the sad and lonely person I've become.

Do not say this! You are probably a wonderful person! You shouldn't put yourself down like this!

Maybe you just need to find new friends. Take a vacation, and get away for awhile!

Answer 4

I feel used by people sometimes and get very upset when I focus on the people that I feel are using or ignoring me. Then I have to start focusing on and listing the positive things in my life in order to feel better about myself. I am grateful that I have a home, my health, a computer and online service. When i am really honest with myself I find there are some good people in my life. I also find that volunteering for our local theater is fun because I get to see the shows free and get to know other volunteers. I hope your situation will improve soon.

Answer 5

I know how you feel. If you keep to yourself you will completely withdraw from everything so you need to still go around people. Put your negative energy into something positive. I am not sure your age, but college helped me. I chose a small branch campus and studied, the people I spoke to were intelligent conversation. These people became friends, but only to the level I let them. You also need to find peace. You have to be able to find beauty in the ugly and in order to do that you need peace within yourself. You can't allow yourself to feel lonely or depressed. You have to find comfort in your life in order to sail through. I hope this is making sense.

Answer 6

Look at the kind of people you choose for friends. What is the same about them that they all turn out to be jerks? What draws you to that kind of person?
Then look around and try to find people that are the opposite of the people you would usually befriend.
Also join a club or a team where you can socialize without getting emotionally involved (read hurt).

Answer 7

I have felt/feel like this too. As far as your friends, try to find someone who will actually care about you. Be more friendly, get out of your building or go to the movies, and make new friends. Just be friendsly.

If you mean your just like bored, like have nothing to do its just couting away time. I've felt that so much. Find things to do, so its like you're not killing time, your using it.

You have one life.
Even if you have felt like you have wasted as much you've spent.
You haven't. You still have so much more ahead of you.
Try to spend it how you think you would enjoy your life most.

Be you.
You can get good friends.
Who like you for you.
Live life happily.

Answer 8

focus on what you control. Don't worry about society and things beyond your control, focus on your actions and your attitude. besides isn't it just amazing that we are all sharing this great big beautiful mess anyway?

Answer 9

its not ur fault remember that and things might clear up but it is your fault what you do from here on

Answer 10

love yourself. treat yourself with respect and people who respect you and love you will follow.