...... so bad I know I'm going to get a lot of ridicule. I am already beating myself up. Long story short - me and my husband seperated years ago and after we seperated I started dating this guy for 3 years. Everyday my husband would plead for me to take him back (he was a complusive cheater and liar) and finally after 3 years I decided to try and make it work. Problem is I never completely left my boyfriend alone and I just ended up pregnant a month ago. I wasn't having sex with both just my boyfriend. After I conceived I slept with my husband unknowing that I was already pregnant. I am disgusted by my husband sexually and I realized that I dont want to be with him I just dont know how to tell him its finally over and that I'm pregnant by someone else. I also don't want to be with my boyfriend either. I am fine raising this kid alone. I just dont want to hurt hubby and I am so confused I dont know what to do. Any suggestions? I know I'm screwed (literally and figuratively).
2007-07-05 15:16:08 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
For those of you who had negative things to say you act like you never dated someone for a while and then decided you didnt want to be with them. Or that after time things would be different (giving an ex a chance and sleeping with then and then realizing its never going to be the same). You people with the dumb responses have done nothing but made me laugh. I dont regret ANYTHING I have done. At all. So if you have negative things to say say it - its just making me laugh. Its not like I'm screwing every Tom, Dick and Harry while being in a committed marriage. I never slept with my husband the whole time I was with my boyfriend and I never slept with my boyfriend while I was with my husband. I ended things with my boyfriend to try to see if I can make things work with my husband.
2007-07-05 15:53:30 · update #1
Do what you feel is best for you and your child.That has to be your top priority no matter what.You'll be bringing an innocent little child into this cruel world.
You have to be honest with your husband and you'll feel better by telling him the truth.There is no easy way.Just the plain and simple truth.It will hurt him but he will get over it.
If you feel you can raise your child alone,then good for you.No one has the right to condemn you.We've all made mistakes in the past we wish we hadn't.
Make a clean break with both of them and begin anew with your little child.Take care of yourself.
God Bless and Good Luck.
2007-07-05 15:27:57 · answer #1 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I feel for you hun!
Stop beating yourself up about it. If you are fine raising the child by yourself, then I would 'fess up with both the husband and the boyfriend. Better to be up front and hurt someone slightly now than lead both of them on and hurt them terribly later. Sounds like you need time away from both of them to help make your decision. Take that time for yourself and for your soon-to-be child. You sound like an intelligent and caring person and I know that you will make the right decision.
2007-07-05 15:33:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you will have to fess up to both men and be frank with them. I would save up as much money as I could, and try to not let stress get the better of you, for the baby's sake. You can definitely raise a child alone, but make sure this is really what you want to do. Good luck.
2007-07-05 15:22:29 · answer #3 · answered by Lauren 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce your husband leave the boyfriend and start a new life with you and your child. You cant stop from hurting someone in a love triangle someone is bound to get hurt. You don't need to tell your husband you are pregnant just leave him. Wish you luck.
2007-07-05 20:17:49 · answer #4 · answered by MZ. Latina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you at this point don't deserve either one. If you are disgusted with your husband sexually, then you should never have thought about taking him back. If you don't want to be with the boyfriend, then you should not have slept with him, or dated him for THREE YEARS.
2007-07-05 15:31:25 · answer #5 · answered by lonepanther2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce hurts, there's no way to stop that, but staying with him under false pretenses is worse. Sex out of wedlock is wrong and now you are paying the consequences for both your sins. The child deserves a dad too. How arrogant of you to think the child will do well with just a mom.
2007-07-05 15:53:06 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy your life sucks! But who's fault is it? Somebody is going to be hurt and if your not careful it could be you. Tell your husband (before you start showing) that you are done with the marriage for no apparent reason. Tell the boyfriend the same thing.......................... Then move to Mexico!
2007-07-05 15:30:40 · answer #7 · answered by pappysgotitgoinon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW lady.....you give women around the world a good name.
At least you had plenty of fun right? I mean having 2 lovers at the same time sounds great....better than that whole marriage and commitment to one partner.
2007-07-05 15:20:24 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you make my life seem so normal! Dont know what to tell ya except I would definately leave your husband. Sounds like you were never really ready to be back with him.
Good luck to you and your baby! It isn't going to be easy being a single parent!
2007-07-05 15:29:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should leave both of them. You do however need to be honest with your boyfriend and let him know that you are having his baby. He needs a chance to be in his kids life. Be clear that you do not want a relationship with either one.
2007-07-05 15:21:25 · answer #10 · answered by screwed 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋