Is there anything I should do to prepare?

Question

Finally for the first time in my life I am going to see my father. I'm 15 and I have never met my father. He lives in New York City. I don't know what to expect, he left when I was 3 months. My mother isn't going to be with me so I will be seeing him by myself. the fact that i don't know who my father is has caused depression. By the time I meet him I will be 16, it is going to be next summer in June, what should I expect or prepare for? This isn't going to be a happy meeting, I'm angry sad and who knows what i might say or do.

Also, I greatly appreciate any thoughtful, respectful answers you give, this is really important to me...
In case you need to know, my mom said was a deadbeat... but who knows...

I live in Illinois so I my mom and jerk of a stepdad will be far. The closest family I will have are my older cousins from my dad's side who live in Philidelphia, they will be taking me to NYC.
I don't know if you will find this important but my real father is Costa Rican.

Answer 1

I don't have any experience whatsoever with what you are going to go through meeting your dad for the first time since you were a baby. I do wish you luck with the meeting, though.

I was thinking that perhaps you might receive more feedback if you posted your question on the "Family" thread in Answers:

http://ca.answers.yahoo.com/dir/;_ylt=ApfxSZRJDHrrseCC13TVU83GPhV.?link=list&sid=396546416

Answer 2

Sounds like you're pretty unhappy about your current home life also. I am hoping your unhappiness at home is not why you are going to see your biological father. If so, this trip may turn out unhappy for all involved.

I adopted my daughter when she was 2 weeks old. She was told around age 12 that she was adopted as her friends started asking because some parents knew.

Must have been one of the few times I got things right and she has written term papers about how " Great" mom and dad are. ( and this was before she even asked for a car.)

I think she is somewhat interested in finding her birth mother and we have talked about that also. I would help her through that process if she wishes but I did tell her that sometimes people make their biological parents out to be something more than they are. Her birth mother may not want to have anything to do with her as it was a painful memory or possibly the mother is dead.

As long as you are going into this meeting with a good head on your shoulders about the outcome, I wish you well. If it is from some sense of altruism or from unhappiness in your life, this visit may not change that.