all of your answers were wonderful thanks, but some of you don't understand what i am actually oing through! i am 19 weeks pregnant & he still has'nt told ANYONE! and this includes mommy & daddy! i haven't heard from him in 6 weeks. & i ask my self over & OVER what did i do wrong? he never wanted to talk about the baby from the moment i told him! he would roll his eyes to the back of his head when i would show him the ultrasound pics.. i am not suppose to cry or hurt about that?He was always making up excuses why he could't come see me or that he feels sick.. i have been to the hospital 3 times & he hasn't shown up once when i need him.. he sends me strait to voicemail when i call. i went from having the most perfect boy frind to the bigest jerk all in a matter of "by the way i am pregnant" how can he just leave me at a time when i need him the most! i beleived we were perfect for each other until i got pregnant!
2007-07-05 11:05:15 · 17 answers · asked by alatingoddess 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I`m 19 weeks as well. The father did a complete turn around on me . He convinced me to keep the baby and then changed his mind. He broke up with me. We were together 3 years, lived together for 1 of them so don`t let people say its because you arent married. Some guys are just scared, some just losers.
It`s scary I know. put up your email and we can message back and forth if you want. I`m scared too and since we are at the same stage, it will be good for us to have someone to talk to in the same position
2007-07-05 14:13:23 · answer #1 · answered by Ashley 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, do not judge all guys for your boyfriend's mistakes and flaws. Second, when my girlfriend ( now fiance ) told me she was pregnant, I was the happiest man in the world. She is about 25 weeks along and I'm can't wait to see my first child (baby girl).
Now, at 19 years, that's too young but then again it is what it is....It seems like your boyfriend isn't mature enough to take responsibility. He is in denial and he is scared of the fact that he is going to have a baby and scared of the reality that it will bring. He thinks his life is ruined and may have some doubts if the baby is actually his. I can give you a million reasons why he is acting the way he is acting but it's not going to change anything.
You need to concentrate on having a healthy baby...THAT'S IT. If the "little boy" you call a boyfriend wants to "MAN UP" that's great, but for now help yourself and the baby be healthy. Everything will fall into place...just wait...Good luck!
2007-07-05 11:22:42 · answer #2 · answered by bizzle 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Because he's a BOY, not a man.
He is only going to be a BABYZ DADDY and that's very sad but the sooner you accept it the better.
A guy will say ANYTHING to get in your pants and once he's there and everythings goin' his way, things are "ALL GOOD!"...
But when a BABYZ DADDY has to get a job and grow up and be a man, that's a different thing.
Lots of BOYS think inseminating a girl means they're a man.
It doesn't.
A real MAN would marry you first and let you finish college.
Consider placing the baby up for adoption or be prepared for some very very hard difficult times raising your child ALONE.....
VERY VERY IMPORTANT:
Man = Father
Boy = Babyz Daddy
Learn and know the difference between these two ladies......It will save you much suffering and heartache.
2007-07-05 11:16:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
No one truly knows anyone until they live together. The simple fact is that no one, especially men, are themselves until they have no choice. Everything men do is to impress women or fuel our pride. I really don't know how other men act on dates but I will open the car door for you, take you out to dinner every week, and make romantic gestures. And it might be our fault for doing so but women get used to being treated this way and accept this as our one true form. Behind closed door, however, most men are really just trying to get in your pants. I hope I'm wrong about him. Maybe it's just his way of coping with the stress. A baby brings a lot of responsibility and he might not be ready for it. You might have to sit down and ask him if he is committed to your relation ship.
2007-07-05 11:27:29 · answer #4 · answered by firetigerbull 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It maybe be just my opinion but he don't want nothing to do with you when you are pregnant. I feel that he was not ready to be a daddy or father to a child. I am sorry to hear that and he don't know what a beautiful thing birth can be. I may not have had that chance to experience it, but I was told it is a sight to see. If he really loved you he would have been there and asnwered your calls. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-07-05 11:23:57 · answer #5 · answered by newhope_26 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some times I think guys are more scared about things like this cause it changes every ones life I personally made sure my boy friend at the time wanted kids too but we used protection before we got our own place and company. to me ma don't worry about him you try throwing the cold shoulder maybe things will change when that baby comes don't let him see it right away let him wonder he's prob having negative thought all kinds of thought he's confused . worry about your self not him . the baby matters right now dont worry so much it could Hert the baby. remember they feel your emotions.
2007-07-05 11:20:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Show him that you don't need him to bring you down, especially at this point in your life. Prove to him that you can do this on your own, and show him what he's missing out on. He's proving to you right now that he truly wasn't in it for the long haul. I hate that this is happening to you, but its better if it happens now than after you have the baby and he's been around for a bit. If he decides that he has time for you and his child, dismiss him just like he dismissed you. I know it may hurt, and it may not be what you want to do, but in the long run you'll be so much happier and you and your baby will have a healthier life. Hope everything works out.
2007-07-05 17:26:43 · answer #7 · answered by Mommy K 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry about your situation. It is unfortunate. However until you really know a person getting pregnant is very dangerous. Men turn into psychotic little babies when girlfriends get pregnant. Your man is dealing with this in the immature and girly way that he is accustomed to.
Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like you can count on this person for anything, so you'd better start researching your options on the assumption that he is going to bail on you.
FP
2007-07-05 11:09:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Like I said...he's probably too immature to accept the fact that he's going to be a father. You say he used to be perfect before your pregnancy...which probably means he didn't love you in the first place. If he was a good boyfriend...he would accept what's happening and deal with it. All you can do is be happy for what's happening inside your belly! I'm sure you have family who support you. Might want to let him know he doesn't have to be a dad...but he does have to be a father! Child Support!!!!!!
2007-07-05 11:13:37 · answer #9 · answered by merynlos 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
D-E-A-D-B-E-A-T D-A-D
What a horrible hurtful person he is. He is a shallow loser who will never get anywhere in life. All you are doing is making yourself upset. THATS not good. You better remind him too that hes half responsible so when is he going to start coughing up half your rent as soon as the babies born and also when is he going to get a two bedroom apt for him and the baby so you can go out?
BTW. You need to think whose name is goign to be on the bruth certifi. If you put his name on it then he gets to give you permission for everything you do. If you dont then you dont need his permission. Also, I would forget calling him and start getting right in there with his parents. They are the ones who are going to be there for you and who are responsible for making him step up to the plate. They might help you too. Its their grandchild. Time to start involving all the families. This is not ab=out you and him.
\Being immature is no excuse. Im sick of hearing that garbage thats another male stereotype guys use to get themsleves off the hook and lay allo the worlds responsibilities on the poor women in the world who are busy rasing all the kids too. Sc*ew that, Theres no excuse. HES IN and thats it and you are going to need all the help you can get becuase otherwise, he just ruined your life and someone elses.
And dont let ANYONE tell you you shouldnt be allowed out. You should be allowed to have HALF your freedom. He needs to get a 2 bedroom and take the child half the time. Then its equal - ypour both able toget educated,, you both get to have a life. Dont accept anything less. Its half and half all the way. Dont suck in for anythign else or you will be short changing yourself and the baby. Your only hope for having a life is if he has the kid half the time. If its weekends plus tryign to get money out of him you are in for a life of misery. He needs to take himn for half and not give money and you go get a job and go to school. Theres no other way.
Dont go old school like some of us did where we get stuck for 15 years with no boyfriend no freedom and no life. Im telling first hand from experience. You will wak up at 36 and go holy sh*t that was my life - lookign at 4 walls.
2007-07-05 11:09:35 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋