my sister inlaw that is, weve had some 'bad blood' but usualy I can firgive people and move on but her its this never ending grudge, not to menton i feel like shes not my husbands sister but another woman(see my questions) so its like i am competing for my husband with her. its like she thinks she is the winner if that makes sense dont get me wrong I would never come between family just dont know why she is always on my dont trust, hate, list
2007-07-05 09:05:37 · 9 answers · asked by cuetee220 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The bad blood was some (no offense) straight up white trash stuff, we phsycaly fought and me and my husband split up and she took all my stuff that I left at the house, (hear any banjos?) And I dont know whenever I am around her I feel nervous and get angry whenever I talk about her
2007-07-05 09:40:48 · update #1
When you hate her and she hates you who is really the looser in this situation.
Yes, it is your husband. He loves both of you and he should. Make it easy for him, if you love him, and be kind to her. This will make your husband just love you more and more. Try it. You will benefit. I promise.
She is not the "other woman" he has chosen you. She just came with the family package.
2007-07-05 09:15:58 · answer #1 · answered by 4HIM- Christians love 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what has she done to make you feel this way whats the "bad blood" about and why are you holding a grudge? maybe I could answer your Q better if I understood what she has done, she had to have done something....."so its like i am competing for my husband with her" whats that about? sounds like you are jealous of her in some way and that's why you hate her.....would like some more info though. thanx for the added info...well that did clear somethings up....are you and your husband trying to work things out? if so I think you need to talk with him and tell him that even though she is his family you 2 do not mix well with each other and you would prefer to not be around her, you need to respect his relationship w/his sister (how ever disturbing it may be)...if you 2 are not trying to works things out than there is no need for her to be in your life...just stay away form her...good luck to you....
2007-07-05 09:17:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think the sexual abuse the two of them suffered at the hands of the babysitter was awful, and the fact that neither of them told anyone or had any sort of counseling makes it even worse.
The two of them have a secret, and a sexual one, at that. So their relationship may seem a little odd to you. If I were you, I'd find out the name of the babysitter and report him or her to the police....suggest counseling for the two of them (separately) or in some other way try to get this out in the open so that it's no longer a secret.
You can't do anything for your sister in law, but as a wife who knows her husband was sexually inappropriate with his sister (first through abuse and later apparently voluntarily) I would INSIST that HE get counseling, and you could go perhaps for a few sessions and deal with the sister in law issue as well. At least then the two of you could get straight, even if she doesn't.
2007-07-05 09:20:56 · answer #3 · answered by lady_phoenix39 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have you ever tried to be her friend? It might be very liberating for you to invite her to lunch one day, tell her you sense some bad blood, but now that you're family you'd like to put that behind you. I would suggest this... it's better for you, her, your husband, everyone. If she scoffs at the idea, then take comfort in knowing you were the better person.
2007-07-05 09:10:01 · answer #4 · answered by Yogi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is probably a very insecure woman, and she lets that insecurity manifest itself in her relationship with you. Because she is family, you feel like you must restrain yourself around her, which makes things even more difficult. You don't have to like everyone in your family, but you have to find some way to deal with them. Avoiding her, without making it obvious to your husband, might be the best option.
2007-07-05 09:10:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have some things going on inside you.Anytime someone elses weaknesses can dictate your life.If this man loves you,and you love him don't worry about her.If she's single she may just be miserable,and wants company.YOu should be the mature one and initiate a truce if possible.She might have beeen best friends with him when they were young,and can't stand to see someone else to close to him.
2007-07-05 09:22:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most family can read the writting on the wall way better than the spouse. What are you hiding that she feels she knows? Sisters really do want their brothers to be happy.
2007-07-05 09:10:12 · answer #7 · answered by New Nana 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people just give you that vibe. You know the one, they'll stab you in the back if they get the chance, don't let your guard down around them, etc. It' s tough when that person is someone you have to have contact with. Do what you can to minimize it and don't let her bait you. Hang in there! They're her issues not yours!
2007-07-05 09:12:23 · answer #8 · answered by tnk3181979 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is she a protective older sister...maybe that is why she is trying to get between...she might not even be aware of what she is doing.
2007-07-05 09:09:11 · answer #9 · answered by Wolfithius 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋