For you Hard-headed yet curious men...?

Question

What was the best method that your parents used in trying to teach you something?
I am having a seriously hard time trying to teach my curious son things that are potentially dangerous.
I had just spoken with him about power lines and the first thing he did last night when we got out of a car was touch one. Luckily it wasn't a live wire. I didn't see it when I parked there otherwise I obviously would'nt have. There has been many storms and one was blown down. Still I nearly had a heart attack and cried about the what if's until I fell asleep.

He has just turned six and seriously wants a spider to bite him so he can be spider-man. We read books on spiders and that has helped. But in General what do you think could help me?

The way I did handle the situation was first I made him sit on the couch so I could calm down a bit. So when I did spank his little butt it wasn't out of anger. Then I spanked him. Then we cried. Then I explained to him that I would never tell him something to be mean to him. I asked him how did he expect me to teach him anything if he disregards what I say to him. Then we cried some more.
I am fortunate that he wants to be a teacher when he grows up.
He then told me he would make sure everyone knew not to touch a powerline.
Still these were consequences of touching them. I obviously failed in trying to teach him beforehand and we just surely lucked out.

Answer 1

This is a tough one. Basically it is a question on his part to trust you, rather than experiment. With my five, I told them what the real world consequences would be if they disregarded my safety instructions and then if it was not a big safety issue, I let them choose. For example, if they wanted to put their finger into the birthday candle. For things that could kill, I make it clear they must obey.

The secret is to not go to the well too many times. If one try's to control everything, then the kid doesn't learn to make good decisions. So as they got older, I gave them more freedom. And if everything is decided by the parent, they will start disregarding instruction. In other words, always say yes, unless there is a strong reason to say no.

Answer 2

As far as power lines you might want to contact the local power company and see if they have a video regarding what happens when power lines get touched. The local fire department might have something as well. It is like having a baby crawling around the house they wont know it is time to not touch the socket until they get a shock. But grabbing power lines is a lot more than a little shock so it may pay to make the extra effort to get the DVD from the power company if you can

Answer 3

Help you? Take a class in early childhood development at the local college. Kids can't reason at that age and you need to enforce your guidance to him with an occasional hand-to-butt reminder. Apparently he not only wants to be spider-man but he believes everything he sees on TV. Maybe you should monitor more of the fantasy crap you let him watch until he is able to understand it is not real.

Answer 4

I'm sorry he scared the crap outta you . . I know how that can be.

My son ran into the street after a ball one day without looking. Fortunately no traffic was coming, but he didn't check that first.

I threatened him. I told him I'd break his leg to save his life if I had to. I'd rather have him crippled than dead.

You might just need to whip him. Then talk to him and tell him how it badly hurt you to have even thought of losing him had that been a live wire.

Answer 5

i was quite possibly the most curious child ever. What my dad what was told me the truth about everything and then said "do you still wanna do that" sometimes the answer was yes and he let me do it, and i learned the hard way. sometimes it takes a few minor injuries or a trip to the emergency room to teach you, i learned my lesson when i flew accross the room when i was playing with the cord to a fan after swimming and went flying accross the room when i plugged it in.

Answer 6

Well first and far most PLEASE DON'T LET A SPIDER BITE HIM!!!!!. And the most important thing kids are curious i have two of my own. But they know that they are the child and i am the parent. And what i say goes. So unless it's completely harmless let him kill his curiousity. But if it's dangerous step in and be a parent.

Answer 7

Tell you son it has to be a radioactive spider, specially charged in an accelerator. Those are hard to come by.

Try not to use fear or guilt on him, those lessons might work in the short term, but they produce psych problems later on.

Answer 8

It seems like he needs to know the difference between what is and what is not everything that you see is not good and everything you read is not real. though superman can fly can you. distinguish the difference between real and fake fact and fiction. And that what you say is for his own well being and should not be questioned or tried.

Answer 9

You didn't say how old he was, but you just have to hope that there aren't any potentially damaging things around. Seems like one of the lads who have to experience things for themselves.

Answer 10

My mother always said hard heads bring soft behinds. That cured me of a lot of stupidity. Not all of it, but most of it. You seem to have it in hand. You talked to him and if he doesn't understand now, then you just have to pray for God to look after him. After all, God looks out for children, fools and old folks.