I try my hardest to do what he wants me to do and be who he says he wants. He has had dozens of women in his life and I have only been with four men in 13 years, so he has MUCH more experience than I do. We have different values and different views on everything, especially raising children and religion. He is constantly looking for ways to cut me down and blame me for the household issues. He often ignores our daughter and calls her a mistake. He says he will be a better father when she is two and three and older instead of a baby like she is now. One of his ex wives says he treated their kids the same way, that's just who he is. He always tells me he wants this or wants that but when I try to do what he wants he finds someway to make me feel like its wrong. He used to say he wanted to marry me but now all he says is that I make him crazy. We only make love once or twice a month now instead of the two or three times weekly that it used to be. I love him but I don't know what to do.
2007-07-05 06:32:39 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Leave him Hun, its not worth the hardache he will bring when married,you more than likey will divorce anyway. Being with someone is about being in love and good,even though we all tend to have are spats from time to time . You need to understand there will be another man for you,dont get all wacked out thinking there wont be--take care of your daughter and you and the rest will take care of its self
2007-07-05 06:40:17 · answer #1 · answered by keithleyjustin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all your main priority should be your child not some guy you love... New life is not a mistake your brought in this world for a reason. A reason we might not know why anytime soon.... He has history of these things, He won't get better at all things might worsen just the fact that he was the same with his ex... Your not a teen anymore to hope cry or wish a man will change his way of being your a parent if he treats you & your DAUGHTER bad.. That itself answers your question unless you don't care about yourself or your offspring.
2007-07-05 06:45:58 · answer #2 · answered by Djuarez83 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through. I have to say that I was in a similar situation and just like you I thought that with time things were gonna get better. You have to know that there is nothing wrong with you. You said that's just the way he is and if you can't tolerate it then don't. If he was the same way with his exes what makes you think he's gonna be different with you. I don't want to get to deep into things because I don't know everything about you too but I don't think it's worth you staying in this relationship. Again I'm sorry if that's not the answer you wanted but I have to be honest and tell you the truth. LEAVE HIM like probably all his exes did.
2007-07-05 06:43:28 · answer #3 · answered by vee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should never be with a men if he treats you bad. you should think about your daughter shes learning and right now she is watching everything that is going on you may love him but your more initialed her and what happens to her then you are to him. it don't matter how many people or experience all you need to care about is that little girl you should never let no man make you feel bad or treat you bad stand up to him and tell him be here now for us or not at all if he say he wont's to be with you then you tell him he needs to step up and act like and man and be with you like a man and women should be not like he is now and keep eye out for the first little bit because he will go right back to the way he was. if he does then just pack up you stuff and leave he'll find out that he's whats wrong in the relationship
2007-07-05 06:53:58 · answer #4 · answered by sweetcup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he could be abusive to a baby shows what a**hole the guy really is. What kind of person is mean to a baby. Trust me if he is mean to her now he will continue to be mean even when she is older. You will have to leave eventually unless you want your child to grow up being emotionally and verbally abused. Think about how much you are hurting right now and imagine how much pain your daughter will be in when she is old enough to understand what he is doing to her. I hope you can find strength and courage to stand up for yourself and your daughter, you both deserve better.
2007-07-05 06:47:26 · answer #5 · answered by Ad101 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do women fall for the bad guys, youre not suppose to do what the man saids 24/7 of your life, you say you try to please him but you shouldnt have to do that. does he ever do anything for YOU? doesnt sound like it, you have to get out of that relationship and be with someone who will treat you the right way, i bet it doesnt feel too good when a man just yells crap in your face making you feel terrible and calling your child a mistake, if my boyfriend told me that i would have left him on the spot, the only mistake is HIM.
and you should put your daughter first she doesnt derserve to be around the kind of environment.
2007-07-05 06:42:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you still with this jerk? He is verbally abusive and it is only a matter or time before it turns physical. You need to think of your daughter and leave him. I wouldn't even think about marrying him if I were you. Ya you love him but if he treats you this way what kind of example are you setting for your daughter. Take a stand and don't let him treat you this way, you deserve better!
2007-07-05 07:13:47 · answer #7 · answered by hazeleyes1279 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you've pretty much answered your own question. You havent really given any evidence that shows why you should stay with him. If he treats you and your daughter badly why the heck are you with him? It makes no sense..why would you put your daughter in an unhealthy situation? Your setting a bad example for her. So stand up for yourself..and be with someone who apreciates you and loves you truely!
2007-07-05 06:41:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So he treats you like garbage, is bad to his daughter and his other children and he has no values or faith. He doesn't touch you except once or twice a month and basically says your marriage and family together is a mistake. What are the qualities that you love???????
2007-07-05 06:50:04 · answer #9 · answered by Jeff D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you continue to love someone who is mean to you? Perhaps you love what you would like him to be. Any kind of abuse, whether physical, emotional, or verbal is a deal breaker! He is already backing out of commitment. And when you are of different faiths, you have a real problem. You might need to move out and move on while you are still healthy enough to go. You and your child deserve better treatment and I wouldn't wait till she's older to see if she gets it.
2007-07-05 07:04:22 · answer #10 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋