I divorced my ex husband in 2002, I have four kids with him. He has never paid child support even though he was court ordered to do so. He doesn't carry medicial like he is suppose to and the last time that he saw them was in 2003. He was very abusive to both me and my kids and I have all of my kids in therapy because of the abuse that they had to go through. I am now remarried and my husband is wanting to adopt the kids, he does everything for them that a dad does. We are afraid that if we start the adoption the sperm donor is going to find out and come back and try to get visitation rights or worse custody of them? Not because he wants them but because he knows that would get to me. What rights does he have to my children??? Also I recently found out that he has 4 other children, who he does not support and denies that he is the father of...he is a deadbeat
2007-07-05 04:58:55 · 20 answers · asked by Angela F 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The reason why the state has taken the money out of his paychecks is because everytime they find out where he works and sends the order to take the money, he quits the job and goes to working under the table for a while. He moved around constantly so that he can't be found.
To the person that asked why I didn't say deadbeat parents..it is nothing personal. If I was dealing with a deadbeat mom, my question would have been just that.
2007-07-05 07:14:39 · update #1
you might be the luckiest woman on the face of the earth.. you found a man who would take on four kids and support all five of you... he must be a peach...make sure you take real good care of this guy....that is all way past my limits.... especially if theres no support payment coming in... i dont really know what to tell you regarding the past father... the best of luck to you in your adoption attempts...:)
2007-07-05 05:06:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, although you feel he is a "sperm donor", and it surely sounds like that all he is, he is still the kids "father"..you CAN have him jailed for not following a court order, (child support, and health care)..and this will help pave the road for paternal termination..FROM the court!
Take proof of lack of support, your kids therapy records, and hopefully a statement from your kids therapist to the judge in family court asking for termination of his parental rights..do NOT mention the adoption, when his parental rights ARE terminated, you will be free to do as you wish for the adoption...God bless your new husband!!
2007-07-05 05:05:14 · answer #2 · answered by kat k 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Regardless if he is a deadbeat or not, he is still the children father...Unless you know for sure that he will be willing to sign over his rights to allow your new husband to adopt the children, there is really not much you can do...
If he was ordered to pay child support and haven't, then you need to go back to court and hold him in contempt of court for failure to pay child support....
If all else fail, speak to an attorney
2007-07-05 05:05:48 · answer #3 · answered by plumprump26 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women have been known to air the (alleged) dirty laundry on social media, to friends and family, and any other way they can. They will provide statements that-if true-would back up the allegation that the man is a deadbeat. They want others to think he is so they come out looking better. Be aware of that. I don t care who you are, who you know, how you re related to someone. You cannot take anything at face value. All people have agendas and different levels of morality. In other words, don t judge people based on one side of the story.
2015-05-15 06:48:56 · answer #4 · answered by Brad 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will have to be notified, I'm pretty sure. You might want to consult a Domestic Law attorney in your area. Sometimes if the father hasn't had contact in over 12 months, the step-parent can legally adopt the children. Depends on the state you are in. Good luck.
2007-07-05 07:14:36 · answer #5 · answered by stacilynn26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this isn't the answer you want to hear, but in the courts opinion he has the same rights to the children that you have. Afterall, that is their father, even though he is a deadbeat. You will have to go through processess to get him to sign over his parental rights to your husband. And, if you tell him you are going to have him put in jail for not paying his support obligation, that just may do it.
2007-07-05 05:40:53 · answer #6 · answered by green_clovers66 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have a pretty good case for abandonment. Check with a lawyer and see if you can have his parental rights taken away because he has abandoned the children.
Quite frankly, if the scum hasn't paid child support in four years, not only is he not going to get visitation, chances are his butt will be going to jail!!!
2007-07-05 05:07:31 · answer #7 · answered by Rebecca W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Deadbeat or not...he has to sign away his parental rights for your husband to adopt them. you cannot just do it and hope that he doesn't find out. He still has right to the kids. You can talk to an attorney and see what your rights are where he seems to have abandoned them but Iam betting the odds are slim to none that your hubby can adopt without the exes consent. Sorry.
2007-07-05 05:01:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately he is the biological father so he has rights. I doubt that he would want the kids but he must sign over his parental rights in order for your husband to adopt them. You need to contact a lawyer if you don't already have one. Check out your local bar association for your state or city they can give you the names of lawyers that specialize in family and domestic law.
2007-07-05 05:11:22 · answer #9 · answered by alisjohnst 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am surprised you're even afraid about this.
Women seriously have most of the power when it comes to custody and visitation, and in your case, this man has willingly abdicated his parental rights and responsibilities.
File immediatley for all past due child support, and get the government after him. Watch how easy the adoption process will become. Heck, I'm not certain, but you can probaly collect past due support even if your prospective spouse does win adoption.
Don't be afraid at all.
2007-07-05 05:06:27 · answer #10 · answered by purplex62 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If the father has not seen the children for over a year you DO NOT need his consent Even if you was to contact him to get consent and he didn`t sign the judge would more than likely let your husband adopt them because the judge will rule in the best interest of the child
Edit to "DAD" is Worthless a better term?Wather its a mother or father if they don`t take care of their children their "WORTHLESS"
2007-07-05 05:11:42 · answer #11 · answered by michelle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋