Can you have a male friend and be married without the sex thing getting involved?
2007-07-05 03:30:08 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes, friendship is the best basis for love.
2007-07-05 03:33:48 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough question, one that I've wondered about myself many times. I think that you can have a male friend when you're married, but there have to be clear limits. Like it's probably not a good idea for the two of you to go out alone, that just appears inappropriate even if its innocent. The best idea that I have found is to include your husband in your friendship with the other guy as much as possible. Being alone with another man is sometimes too tempting, even for people who are in love and would never want to hurt their husband. Also make sure that you don't run to your guy friend every time you and your husband have a problem. Keep your marital spats between you and your husband or you could end up seeing your guy friend as a substitute for your husband or comparing them unfairly, such as "He would never treat me this way if we were married" or "Why can't my husband be like him?" I guess my answer is yes, you can be friends, but only if you are very careful and stick to clear, appropriate guidelines. Hormones are tricky things and can get in the way of a good marriage in a hurry. Just think about how you would want your husband to behave with a female friend, and that will give you a lot of the answers you need. How would you feel if the situation were reversed? I hope this gives you some of the answer that you're looking for. I know you'll make the right decision for you and your husband.
2007-07-05 10:42:21 · answer #2 · answered by Mississippi girl 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, there are sort of secret rules from what I can guess...if you were friend before you got married, its ok as long as your spouse has met them. If you are co-workers, that fine because you don't really have an option there, but keep your spouse in the loop as to your friendship or he/she may become jealous at some point. If you meet them randomly like at a park or something and you are by yourself and so is the other person, its a little suspect because first, people don't usually just make friends so easily by themselves while out in public, and second because if the other person is single, it looks like they are hitting on you. If you have a big group of friends, some single, some married, its ok to hang out with the single non married opposite sex ones, but keep your spouse informed of that as well. These are all just kind of how my husband and I work.
2007-07-05 10:55:49 · answer #3 · answered by its about time 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if you have two people who are wise enough to make sure they are never in situations with the opposite sex where it could turn into something more.
I know that I, for example, will not have another man in my home when my hubby isn't here... the same with him having another woman in the house. We don't go out alone with the opposite sex, we are a couple so we go together.
I personally don't even really develop friendships with those of the opposite sex unless they are hubby's friends. I know men and I talk to them at work, but I don't go hang out after work or do any of that.
It's just being smart enough to make sure nothing could ever happen.
2007-07-05 10:44:22 · answer #4 · answered by az_mommma 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I have several female friends and no the sex thing is not involved.
2007-07-05 10:41:53 · answer #5 · answered by harold 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think of this person the same way as you do your girl friends. I really hope girls and guys can be friends after marriage because one of my really good friends is getting married on Saturday. I would be really upset if i couldnt be friends with him anymore!
2007-07-05 10:46:06 · answer #6 · answered by mable3691214 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sure you can have friends, but you shouldn't be going out with your opposite sex friends alone or replacing the friendship you have with your spouse. Your spouse should be your best friend and confidant.
2007-07-05 10:44:12 · answer #7 · answered by Yogi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, most definitely, but depending on the level of your friendship and how close you become, you might have to establish boundaries that you both agree not to cross.
2007-07-05 10:36:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Um Yes But the guy still needs to pleasure himself when he's think about them when he's alone.
2007-07-05 11:48:00 · answer #9 · answered by NeoforPrissilla 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course, my parents have both male and female friends and it is not like it is against the law plus he cant decide who your friends are.
2007-07-05 10:34:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋