I lied to my boyfriend about.................!!?

Question

being pregnant back in Feb & now he still thinks I am. I know I should not have done this, I feel like total **** for doing it too, but how do get myself out of it without ruining the relationship? I love him to death & I don't know Y I did it. I guess I just wanted to see his reaction or something.The plan, in the begining was for me to terminate the (fake) pregnancy, & that was what he thought I was going to do. On the day that I told him the abortion appt was, he called me at work & said " I don't hate to say this but, don't go the appt today, forget about getting the abortion, go ahead & have the baby". What am I supposed to do now? How do I get out of it? What are some things I can say? We actually live together, so I have been hiding alot of things from him such as my cycle & etc. I really do want to get pregnant by the way & I have been put on a Med called Clomid to help concieve, but I'm not due to start that until 7/6/07. Can anyone help?? Please B Nice 2 me, I very sensitive.

Answer 1

A lot of people when they believe they are in love with a man will do anything to keep them, even lie about a pregnancy, if they feel they are about to lose them. Or even try to get pregnant to keep them. I know you must love him, but be honest with him. If he finds out you lied to him about all this you may lose him anyway. I know you're probably scared as hell to tell him, you've got yourself in pretty deep. If it was meant to be, then it will happen. But if in the case you just can't bring yourself to tell him, just keep trying to get pregnant, or (another lie here..) you can always tell him that you miscarried. I don't agree with what you did, but I understand since my best friend did the same thing and even my sister. Good Luck to you!!!

Answer 2

You are SENSITIVE? Well, let me be as nice as I can be...

TELL HIM THAT YOU LIED TO HIM! Just be out with it and come clean.

I cannot say that you will NOT ruin your relationship with him. If I was him, from what you have said and done, I would end it with you! You didn't just test him to see his reaction, in fact, you took it to the next level and lied about scheduling an abortion. He has been thinking about this NON-STOP and to know that he came around to wanting this "baby" is so sad! You have done one lie after another and it is time to STOP it!

Telling him is going to hurt him on so many levels. However, continuing to LIE to him will hurt so much more!

I say tell him the truth and then apologize apologize apologize! The chips will fall where they may. If you will lie like this, I don't know what else you would lie about! Also, it sounds like you are trying to TRAP him and that is SO UNCOOL! You are now TRYING to get pregnant by him? OH Come on...perhaps you have some insecurity issues that need to be dealt with before you bring an innocent child into the mix.

Tell him the TRUTH about EVERYTHING (Including the pills to increase fertility)...then you two can decide TOGETHER if you want to continue a relationship, create a child, and co-parent together.

In the future, if you want to know something, then why not just say, "I am curious...what would you think if...." so that you two may have a discussion without lieing and hurting.

Truth

Answer 3

Well your a little to far along to fake a miscarriage now. Considering this is July so that would make you 5 months pregnant.I have to tell you the relationship is probably going to end. Instead of getting on Clomid why not try other medications to help you with your mental stability.It is not ok to lie to someone like this and I'm sure he has been going around telling everyone that your pregnant. You need to tell him that you have lied and see how it goes from there because at this point he will find out!Better you tell him than let it continue to where you cant hide it anymore.Also this is the month your suppose to start showing.

Answer 4

You have to tell him the truth regardless of the outcome; and you need to do it right away. This man is making plans for a future that is based on a lie. This is truly an unforgiveable act and even if he is able to get past it, it will probably take some time before he comes around, so be patient ~ you owe hime that. Clearly he cares about you and the "child" since he didn't want you to go through with the abortion, so maybe it will work out.

Answer 5

You may be sensitive, but what you've done to your boyfriend is pretty darn insensitive.
As the saying goes, you got yourself into this mess, you're going to get yourself out.
I, as everyone else, worry about your maturity and possibly mental health that you told him you were pregnant. This is how stories about women who kidnap children or murder a pregnant woman for their babies starts out. A HUGE blantant lie. You said you did it to see his reaction, now you get to see his reaction when you tell him you made it all up.
I'm not sure if you said it to try to "keep him" at all, but I can almost guarantee that if you did, he'll be leaving for sure this time!
You have to fess up and tell the truth. If you lie again, and say that you miscarried or had a stillborn, he'll worry the entire time if you did happen to get pregnant, not to mention if he attended any appts with you, he might ask your Dr. about your "previous history" and then you'd have to fess up right there in the Dr's office that it was all a lie.
I suggest you confront him and tell him the truth. Be prepared to be single after that. I would never be able to forgive someone who did that to me.
And reconsider starting Clomid until you've had some time to think about it and maybe even considered counselling.

Answer 6

I agree with the others. Fess up. Sit him down and tell him that you have some terrible news and you don't want him to hate you. Tell him that you wanted so much to be pregnant with his child, you told him you were, sort of hoping that if you both believed in it so strongly, it would make it come true. But it's been four months, and there's no baby after all. Apologize profusely, beg his forgiveness.

It was a huge lie. He may not forgive you, or it may take him a long time to forgive you. But it's better to get this relationship back on track than to risk keeping the secret any longer.

Answer 7

You already lied once, and if you are with this guy for the long term, you either have to come clean, or continue the lie - and add more lies to it!

If you can't bring yourself to tell the truth, a tearful confession about a really late period and a false positive pregnancy test should do the trick...

I think you should wait a while and make sure this is a committed relationship before taking the steps you are about to take to have a baby. Get a pet and see how that goes for a year.

Don't ever lie to him again.

Answer 8

First off you have to know that not everyone is going to be nice and you're in no position to ask people to be nice to you...you've done an awful thing.
What in the world would posess you to lie about being pregnant and keep it up this long...if you live together, he has to know somethings not right unless he's completely blind. you'd be around what, 5 months...you'd be showing, he's gotta be smarter than that.
you need to just tell him what you did and come clean. i learned that when you lie about one thing, it haunts you forever because you have to tell a lie to cover a lie and then another and another.....then one day you forget what the original lie was about and tell on yourself. you need to just come clean so you guys can have a fresh start and give him a fair shot at deciding what he wants to do....right now you're not giving him any choices because he doesn't know you're not pregnant and if you lie to him telling him you lost the baby or something then he's gonna feel sorry for you and want to have another which if he knew the truth he could decide if he wants a baby or even wants you for that matter. You're not being fair, he's needs a clean shot at making up his own mind and you not doing it for him.
If i were you i would work on my relationship before working on bringing a baby into a disfunctional situation.

Answer 9

You have to stop hiding things from him if you want to have any sort of decent relationship. I think you really already know what to do. You need to just come out and tell him what happened.

He sounds like a very nice guy and I feel really bad for him. Lying about being pregnant (and to let it go on this long) was a really low down and cruel thing to do. I think you have alot more growing up to do before even THINKING about having kids of your own.

Come clean and hope he forgives you for toying with his emotions. Then, if he stays with you, be completely up front about everything or else you will have a very miserable relationship.

Of course you could always say you miscarried and lie to him some more, but, believe me, you will eventually feel the sting of all the lies later on down the line..... maybe it won't be until years later, but these things WILL come back to haunt you.

Treat this obviously upstanding guy the way he deserves to be treated, with honesty and respect..... you are the one who should suffer the consequences of your lies, not him.

Sorry to be so blunt, but it's the right thing to do. It will be tough, but if you really love this guy, you need to be honest with him.

I wish the best of luck to you!

Answer 10

WOW! You told us the truth but not your boyfriend. See, there is a primitive flaw in what you are doing. What are you going to do if he sees this question?

Since I am male, I will give you my impression of what I see and would like to see.

You probably made this up to keep him in the first place. Telling him is probably sure to run him off. That's okay because it sounds like the ground was shaky to begin with. Let him go.... But let him go so that you don't look like what you look like now. Living with yourself is mandatory, so make it as pleasant as possible. Tell him the truth in the most apologetic way you can. You will feel better and if he stays- BONUS!

Be strong and do the right thing! As you get older you will not want to do these things. It's part of being a young person.

Best of luck to you!!!!

Answer 11

Ok, I am going to be nice but in your situation there is no nice answer.

1st, you set yourself up, you know that, you are a grown woman but you are ACTING like a child by lying to man about something like having a baby. WOW.

So now, you have to face the music and be REAL, grow up and realize that you may loose someone over something STUPID.

2nd, if you are doing things as immature as that, and I am not being mean, just real, you may want to consider not having a baby right now. Real talk, that was nothnig but trifliness and ignorant on your part. You have to grow up, baby.

you are going to have to tell him. There is NO WAY out of this. Even if you did get prego now, the man is not stupid, he will figure out that is a lttle longer than 9 months and he will be asking where your tummy is.

Good luck and word of advice, dont do that **** no more.