male friend, he basically did stuff to her (except intercourse) while I did stuff to her, my question is; we both talked aboutt his at great length the next day and agreed that we LOVED IT! and want to do it again, she says he is nothing more then a "tool" and if it turns me on too then why not? so should we continue this? I am not jelous, I feel secure in my relationship, he is not the type to look deeper in to it and already said he would never call her when I am not there or try anthing dumb, also he is MARRIED as well and his wife does NOT know and he says he is never telling her....so should we set it up for round two? ps our sex life has been way better ever since this happened and it was good before too but this turned it up a bit for sure.!!
2007-07-05 02:04:33 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
WRONG. Not the extra guy, but THAT extra guy. Bringing an extra person into your bed is a different issue, but helping this guy cheat on HIS wife is WRONG. Using him as a "tool" for your fun is selfish, unless his wife is OK with it. Have you thought about possible problems? VD? Pregnancy? What IF one of you- decides they want to stop- but the other doesn't? If ONE extra is OK, how about more? What if the extra guy brags?
2007-07-05 02:24:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
What if the next time he does have intercourse with your wife and she enjoys him better than you? Your friend may have told you, he won't call or come around when you are not there but if you believe that you are ignorant. Since your friend is married and he doesn't plan on telling his wife what happen thus far (but believe me it will come to light) I don't think you should include him in the act unless his wife knows. She has the right to know and express her opinion. And she has the right to expect her husband will honor his vows and to be faithful to her. And on the other hand, she may want to join in. Why not just spice up your sex life with toys, games, different locations, role playing? I personally do not agree with bringing another person/peoplein one's sex life. That is just nasty. But to each his own. If you feel the need to bring another man or woman in your bedroom......you should have never invited a friend/or someone you are close too. That was dumb and it is going to backfire.
2007-07-05 02:29:49 · answer #2 · answered by Boo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do people get married with the vows forsaking all others? This is a really big bomb that will probably blow up in your face. Some people say it can work, but the pros definitely do not outweigh the cons. STD's (especially aids) and no amount of safe sex is 100%, pregnancy (not your baby or your baby with someone else)., You or your wife finding the partner more to your taste than you or her. Ok- pro- MAYBE find a really fantastic sexual experience. Oh, another con on my side anyway, she maybe fixated on the experience when just you and she are together. Do you want to wonder who or what is turning her on? Experiment with each other. Leave anyone else out of the mix. Just my two cents--good luck!
2016-04-01 08:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Normally, I'd say "well, do whatever floats your boat" - it's not for me personally but everyone is different. In this case, however, your little fling would not be victimless....you and your wife would actively be encouraging a man to basically cheat on his wife which is not good. How could you ever look his wife in the face again? It's wrong to do that to her. I won't even go into the moral or emotional repercussions between you and your wife. I wouldn't do this for the simple fact that it's not right for that guy to be playing around sexually with someone else. His poor wife - what in the world would she think? Look, I don't have a problem with couples who "swing" (which is a lifestyle you & your wife should look into - you are prime candidates) as long as everyone involved are consenting adults who fully understand what they're getting themselves into. You may not have a problem with THIS guy but when you open that door, you might not like what else comes through it.
2007-07-05 02:20:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO! If his wife doesnt know of course not....If you all know and are ok with it then fine but thats not fair to his wife at all. If yu have found out that yu like it then find someone else who is not attached or else another couple cause that is just not fair to that wife and also just cause its going ok now dont mean it will end up that way ......but it may go fine as well when yu add an extra into the bedroom....but things can change so hopefully your relationship is secure enough that it wont.
2007-07-05 04:52:46 · answer #5 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't speak from my personal expirience here, but as i know many couples are doing it and there is absolutely no problem. It depends on too many things in the future, not in the present or the past so you can't realy judge at this stage. When he is married too it'll be harder to eventualy destroy yours and his marriage. So as long as it doesn't hurt anyone there is nothing bad in it. But be careful, just in case and think for his wife too. Have fun!
p.s. If you realy trust your wife, maybe it'll be better if you try with a single man insteed of your married friend. The feeling should be the same w/o hurting anyone
2007-07-05 02:23:15 · answer #6 · answered by Fierna 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you at least you all enjoyed it. Now I'm going to put my foot down, you said that both of you agreed, and your male friend was okay with it? If your male friend was doing it to your wife, don't you think that he's been thinking about it for a long time? Maybe it didn't matter to you nor bothered you but you open the door for someone to cheat even with no intercourse, do you think it's okay with his wife what you guys were doing? And to make matters worst he will not tell his wife about what he did. You let your friend become unfaithful with his wife as long as it gives you pleasure.
I'm glad that you are not my friend, cause I do not know what you are thinking,.......I hope god can forgive all of you...
2007-07-05 03:13:24 · answer #7 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if your wife dumps you you can always ask out your best friend's wife... I wish polyamoury worked, but that seems to be the incredible almost unbelieveable exception in a sea of nasty breakups.
I am sure it spiced up your sex life. But if you want to preserve your marriage, BEFORE you embark on a wild journey of discovery with your wife AND best friend, I'd suggest you and your wife see a non-judgemental counselor, to see if your marriage is REALLY ready for this.
2007-07-05 02:13:23 · answer #8 · answered by SC 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All well and good however it can turn nasty I and a former partner (wife) went into a three some at first it was great but eventually we started to argue du to my wife wanting it more and more the guy was married but as with your friend kept it secret eventually i was put out on the outer its not worth it eventually some one gets hurt usually the husband
2007-07-05 02:11:50 · answer #9 · answered by cormucus 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If your friend was single I would say as long as you all know your limitations then go for it. But, your friend is married as well! How do you think your friends wife would feel if she finds out about this? Maybe she'd like to join in the festivities as well. But, this is wrong because she does not know, so there for he is cheating on his wife. I would stop for now until he's man enough to admit this stuff to his wife.
2007-07-05 02:11:02 · answer #10 · answered by Torey♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋